


F(r)iendly Competition

by Omoni



Series: Random Undertale Stories and Drabbles [25]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alphynecentric, Alphys/Undyne-centric, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Depressed Character, Canon Lesbian Couple, Depression, Established Relationship, F/F, Frisk "I want to stay with you" ending, Jealousy, Lesbian Sex, Post-Canon, Premonition, Suicidal Ideation, Suicide Attempt, True devotion, fears of infidelity, post-true pacifist ending, trigger warning: suicide attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-04
Updated: 2019-12-11
Packaged: 2020-11-15 11:01:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 18
Words: 43,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20865116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Omoni/pseuds/Omoni
Summary: Post True Pacifist, "I want to stay with you" ending, and contains all the spoilers.After three years of blissful marriage, Undyne and Alphys have been working at Toriel's skill for most of those years, and Frisk is growing up into the ambassador they'd all dreamt they would be.After Alphys has a dream about Undyne cheating on her, she is convinced that it will come true. Undyne is sceptical - until the woman Alphys dreamt of suddenly appears as a new teacher for Toriel's school. Suddenly, Alphys is terrified that she will lose Undyne - and as a result, Undyne ends up feeling the same way for her.Co-written with GemR: full credit goes to her for the story idea, as well as a great deal of the dialogue. She doesn't have a screenname (yet), as this is her first story. Give her love in the comments, please!Please read the tags, absorb the warnings, then Enjoy!





	1. Chapter 1

It began with a dream.

One so real that there was no doubt about it: it was premonition.

And Alphys knew: she _had_ to pay attention.

* * *

_She felt hot and cold with anger, humiliation just around the corner._

_Three years. It had been three years since they got married, longer, still, if including their very first day, which they did._

_ Almost to the day, they'd been together for three years, and those years had been perfect, like a dream come true._

_Undyne was a wonderful wife. She was patient, kind, and compassionate. She had trouble sometimes understanding body language, as well as missing facial cues that she shouldn't miss._

_But with Alphys, it was like magic, how easy it was to understand her._

_ And Alphys found herself similarly ensnared, her heart pinned to the wall of her insides with a bright blue spear…_

_Three years of love and devotion._

_Now gone._

_Because now, Alphys watched in horror, stopped cold in her tracks, stunned._

_Undyne was before her, just standing outside of a local bar. _

_That would have been find if she'd been alone, or with friends Alphys knew, but that was not what was happening._

_A stranger was kissing Undyne – and Undyne was kissing back. _

_Alphys could see, even this way, that the stranger was beautiful. She was a kind of monster that tended along the lines of herself and Undyne: they were like anthropomorphic versions of smaller, regular animals. _

_This stranger was a lioness, her fur short and honey-golden, a kind that looked soft, with a mane of long, white-blonde hair - hair Undyne held. Her round ears were pierced in a few places, and they sparkled with earrings made of precious stones. S_ _he was tall, too; tall, and muscular, and yet also deeply feminine, in a strong, stoic way, like Undyne was. She wasn't slim, but Alphys knew: she had washboard abs. She could see them through her tight, midriff-baring shirt…_

_And inside, she felt her heart suddenly break in two, then fall to the floor of her soul, the spear remaining stuck in the wall above it._

* * *

“Undyne…”

Undyne's twitching ears woke her, especially when they finally translated what she was hearing into speech: Alphys, calling for her in her sleep.

Likely thanks to another nightmare.

Unfortunately, that wasn't unusual. Alphys had too many nightmares, usually of her past work in the True Lab, as well as what happened while the world was engulfed in that white light. She had been encased in a bell jar of a deep, lonely sadness, and she had yet to fully emerge from beneath; it had been there before Frisk had even known, themself.

It was depression, and not one formed from her past actions, not completely: rather, it was a chemical imbalance, Alphys had explained once, one that made her brain work differently, and thus it affected her personality. She was easily sad, easily hurt, and had a great deal of trauma, especially in regards to failure and abandonment.

Undyne didn't care; she'd never cared.

Not even when they’d just been friends, and she figured it out on her own, months before Alphys had the courage to tell her.

Undyne loved Alphys, and made sure to tell her every day. She loved Alphys, and never wanted to go anywhere or be with anyone else in the entire world. She'd married Alphys because she meant it, meant every single vow, including sickness – and death.

Nothing would make Undyne leave Alphys.

_Nothing_.

But this dream had been far too real, and had reeked of premonition.

Monsters knew that dreams often held a magic of their own, and sometimes gifted – or cursed – a selected few the gift of foresight.

But often, later, there were always regrets. They couldn't change it. Even knowing it did nothing to stop it. 

Alphys had had dreams like this, before. She had, and they'd come true.

And now, trapped within another, it didn't matter if she heard Undyne’s voice beside her: she knew it would come true.

No matter what.

Undyne, oblivious, did what she always did whenever she found Alphys trapped this way: she slid behind her and wrapped around her, holding her against herself. She started to pet Alphys, to soothe her into waking up – and calmly – so that she awoke feeling safe.

When she leaned in to kiss Alphys's cheek, she found it already wet with tears, and that surprised her – she'd never done it, before.

This was serious.

“Alphy?” she called softly. “Wake up, baby. You're okay. It's not real. _I'm_ real, and right here, okay?”

Alphys went quiet, then twitched a little, especially the next time Undyne said her name. Her eyes then snapped open, and she woke up just as abruptly. She gasped, then shut her eyes and choked off a sob, just barely doing it in time.

“Hey…” Undyne called gently, kissing her cheek and finding it wetter. “You okay? What was _that_ about?”

Alphys opened her eyes again, as the question brought the images she'd dreamt of back to life, and she didn't want to see them, ever again. She shook her head and stayed silent, despite the fact that she started to tremble.

“Alphy?” Undyne repeated, worry starting to gnaw at her gut. Usually, all it took was a kiss, just one, to get her to talk, to spill all her pain and grief and then be rid of it all.

“No,” Alphys asked out, instead, her voice breaking. “I-I can't…”

“Yes, you certainly can,” Undyne corrected firmly.

“No, I'm sorry, I-I… _can't_,” Alphys repeated, covering her eyes and wishing she could claw them out; even open, she could still see Undyne... kissing… _that_ _woman_…

"Why not?” Undyne demanded, her voice sharp. “You've always told me before"

"I don't w-want to upset you,” Alphys admitted at last.

"Upset _me_? _You're_ the one crying!” Undyne pointed out. “C'mon, Alphy, it's just a dream; it's not real! Tell me, so I can help!”

"No, let it go!” Alphys pleaded. She even tried to wriggle out from her embrace, about to offer to sleep on the couch, when Undyne's answer made her freeze.

"Hey, no secrets between us, anymore, remember?” Undyne murmured, her voice now soft – and worse for it. “If something ever makes you cry, even if it's just a stupid dream, I wanna know, because I wanna help!”

"You don't want to know _this_, and _I_ don't want to talk about it!” Alphys said, a plea hidden within her words.

Undyne heard it, louder than she did the words Alphys spoke, but by now, she was worried. She sat up, gritted her teeth, and rolled Alphys over onto her back.

Alphys went still, her eyes going wide. In the dark midnight light, and without her glasses, she could barely see details of Undyne's face. When she moved, she leaned over Alphys closely, so that she was certain to see Undyne's face more clearly, and it worked.

Alphys swallowed hard; Undyne looked _terrified_, now, and it made her heart wrench.

“Alphys,” she snapped, clenching her teeth for a moment. “Please, for _fuck's_ sake, just tell me!"

Alphys closed her eyes, trying to cover her own mouth, but Undyne pinned them down, and she finally gave up, and her eyes met Undyne's.

Suddenly, the hurt and horror she'd experienced in the dream resurfaced, and she just blurted it out. _"You cheated on me!"_ she cried, her voice breaking.

_"What?!"_ Undyne cried, blinking hard with surprise.

That was the _last_ thing she'd ever expected to hear.

"In my dream, you cheated on me," Alphys clarified, before she moved away and curled up into a ball, facing away from Undyne, now.

"Alphy, c'mon,” Undyne pleaded, sitting up, again. “You know I'd never do that to you. _Ever_. It was just a stupid dream! The _idea_ of me cheating on you is stupid on its own, let alone a dream! Least of all in reality!”

Alphys didn't move, save to curl her tail around herself tighter.

"Alphy, please turn back around and look at me?”

Alphys shut her eyes and swallowed hard, but still refused to move. She wanted to, yearned to, but punished herself and kept herself still.

Undyne sighed, then laid back down and curled back up against Alphys, spooning her back again. "It's just a dream; that's all,” she insisted. “Brain fiction, fucking brain _farts_! That's all dreams are! Why would I want anyone else when I already have you?"

"Because you can do _better_,” Alphys muttered, the idea of it making her flinch, her heart aching sharply.

"There _isn't_ better,” Undyne answered, hurt and anger making her voice low. “I married the _best_. I'm in bed, _holding_ the best in my arms, right now!”

Alphys had gone very still, so Undyne continued.

“No one else will _ever_ lie in these arms, never – except you - _only_ you." Undyne whispered it, then leaned down to kiss the curve of her neck softly.

"I don't want to talk about it anymore,” Alphys answered, her voice meek and continuing to plea. “C-can we please j-just go back to sleep?"

"Of course, sweetie," Undyne agreed, giving her neck a final kiss before holding her tight. "I'm right here if you need me, if you wanna talk about it, okay?”

“Okay,” Alphys whispered in agreement, closing her eyes and leaning back against her wife, deciding to focus only on her, just her alone.

Undyne smiled and kissed her cheek, then rested her cheek against Alphys's shoulder and shut her eye.

In moments, she was sleeping, again, her grip on Alphys staying firm and close.

But Alphys couldn't get back to sleep; those images kept plaguing her mind, as if on replay. She turned around to see Undyne still deeply asleep, and she just… watched her sleep, thinking how lucky she was to have her, that Undyne was her wife.

_Do I even deserve her?_ she wondered, her pinned, aching heart threatening to shatter.

Right then, Alphys decided she didn't care if she did, anymore; she would make the most and the best of every moment she got to with her, from now on.

Just in case


	2. Chapter 2

The next morning, Undyne awoke alone.

She turned over sleepily, her hand blindly reaching for Alphys – then landed upon nothing but sheets, now cool. Her eye snapped open, and she saw no sign of Alphys.

She'd clearly been gone for a while. 

Undyne bit her lip, a wave of worry making her stomach clench, but that was also when she suddenly heard a crashing sound, coming form down the hall – one that was followed by a soft-spoken curse and self-shushing noises.

Undyne relaxed, then, as she recognised all of those sounds, and she smiled instead, lying back down. She listened harder, her ears twitching, and could hear more movement, but no more cursing. She shifted a little, then inhaled using her gills in order to smell.

She blinked and smiled wider: breakfast foods.

_Alphy is cooking!_

Undyne blushed deeply and suddenly buried herself beneath her blanket, closing her eye. She couldn't help it: the idea of Alphys being so sweet and so selfless made her feel _so much_, but since she was used to keeping it hidden, she literally hid herself from it.

All while grinning with a schoolgirl blush, her entire body awash in excited tingling, and it took all she had not to start giggling like crazy.

Alphys did not cook. She didn't usually do things like this – not and make it into something. She either did it and hid, or did it and pretended she didn't. Very rarely did she do it openly, thus inviting compliments.

Because Alphys didn't know how to handle compliments, even with Undyne.

And that was the point.

Alphys was inviting compliments, because she knew how much doing so meant to Undyne.

It was so sweet, and Undyne loved her for it.

But... why?

Why did she think she needed to do this?

Undyne didn't have time to think on it, as at that moment, the door creaked open, and Alphys poked her head in – her expression falling once she realised Undyne was awake.

“Did I wake you?” she asked, walking in with her arms full of tray. “I’m so sorry! I-I tried to st-stay quiet, but…”

Undyne stared at the tray, her heart pounding with shock. A plate was stacked with perfect - if a little messily-shaped - pancakes, smothered with maple syrup and chocolate chips. There was a huge glass filled with a multifruited, almond milk smoothie, placed beside strong black coffee, and two slices of buttered dark rye bread.

Upon seeing all of that, Undyne realised just how long and hard Alphys had worked on it, and her eye went back up to her wife's face, her own drawn with worry. Alphys was walking over with a slump and a pout, fussing over Undyne and apologising for what Undyne felt was no reason to apologise…

So she reached up and took the tray, in the middle of Alphys's latest sentence, and silenced her. Their eyes met, and Undyne set the tray beside herself, before reaching for Alphys’s hands, instead. She pulled on them, and Alphys stumbled over, dropping into the space between Undyne's side and the edge of the bed. Undyne looped her arms around Alphys's waist and hugged on, and Alphys found herself blushing deeply, but with a shy smile.

“Hi,” she whispered, when Undyne said nothing and just looked into her eyes. She reached up and touched her cheek, and Alphys smiled wider, leaning into it and closing her eyes.

Undyne felt her heart thud harder against her ribcage, and she bit her lip. "Alphy, my god...” she whispered.

Alphys's eyes snapped open, and her smile vanished, but Undyne touched the other side of her face and smiled gently, rubbing both of her cheeks and trying to keep the colour within them.

“Breathe,” she added, and Alphys laughed weakly, shaking her head and closing her eyes, sniffling - while breathing, again. “It's okay. It's a _good_ thing. You're beautiful, and I'm proud to be your girl.”

Alphys stared at her, her eyes wavering, just like they did mere years before, on their wedding day, when Undyne said that yes, she would.

“You're my wife,” Alphys answered softly, her own hands going up to touch Undyne's – and Undyne felt her fingers tremble.

“Is that a question?” Undyne teased lightly, but Alphys nodded a little. _“Yes,_ baby! I'm your wife! You're mine! And you are _so sexy right now!”_

Another burst of shy laughter, and Alphys was scarlet, trying to hide behind Undyne's hands. “Oh, you'd say that to anyone who feeds you food in bed!” she teased.

But Undyne heard it: a note of doubt – of _self-hatred_.

_“No,”_ Undyne answered firmly, her hands tightening their hold, and Alphys's eyes met Undyne's again, their colour dark with silent fear. “Alphy, what's _with_ you?”

“It was that… _d-damned_ _dream,”_ Alphys confessed. “I'm… still spooked.”

Undyne's stomach sank, but at the same time, she actually figured that was the case. “It wasn't real, Alphy. And it _never will be.”_

Alphys stared at her, then, her own heart aching. She couldn't help it; she realised, in that second, that she stood at a crossroads.

Tell the truth, and put Undyne on alert... and worry her for no reason, making her paranoid over something that might not even happen in the first place...

Or say nothing, and just enjoy what she had, and forget about what _could_ have been... and instead focus on what _really is,_ premonition be damned?

_It might not even happen,_ she kept thinking, more than anything else. _And if it doesn't and I worry her, I just look scared and untrustworthy…_

_That's it, then._

“You're right,” Alphys murmured weakly. “I'm sorry. I-I… s-sometimes I just…”

Undyne smiled and pressed her forehead to Alphys's, her eye glinting, and she smiled. Alphys stared into it, letting its gentle calmness permeate into her soul.

“I know,” Undyne whispered, and Alphys knew it to be true. If anything, Undyne was the _only_ one who would. “And I will _always_ be here to reassure you of reality. Got it?”

“Y-yes, so long as you don't starve to death, and eat!" Alphys agreed, her soft laugh, after, finally real. “I worked _hard!”_

“So I see!” Undyne cried, her eye going back to the tray. “And that was why I ‘my god'ed!”

“Then prove it with an empty plate,” Alphys repeated with a nudge. “I'm going to shower. When I’m back, it better be empty!"

Undyne grinned wider, all teeth, and Alphys's cheeks when redder, even as she moved out of her arms.

“You got it,” she agreed.

Alphys bit her lip, about to say something else, before she forced herself from the room, her tail rigid.

It made Undyne giggle softly once she knew she wouldn't be heard – but all between mouthful of delicious pancakes.

She now had a better idea, thanks to that tail.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW - sex

Alphys was still shaky as she showered, her mind half back in bed with Undyne, the other still scared and caught in a nightmare.

The feeling was so conflicting that it made her feel cold, even with hotter water, and she wished her mind wasn't so _broken_…

It wasn't her fault, anymore than it was Undyne's. Her mind was wired the way it was and that was that. Like being yellow or liking someone regardless of gender, it was just who Alphys was.

But premonition was something that all monsters shared, and she felt guilt bite into her. If she simply told Undyne that part, if she said it was premonition, and that was why…

_But if it never happens, why bring it up at all?_

Alphys sighed. She conceded to the second voice. She always did. She always chose the one path that meant the least conflict; she was a coward in that regard.

She didn't want to lose Undyne, no matter what; driving her away thanks to paranoia was the worst possible thing she could ever do.

She _thought_; in fact, it was something else altogether, but she had no way of knowing it until much too late.

For now, she simply dwelt on it, worrying more and more, until she suddenly wished she could go back to bed...

When suddenly, the door opened, and the curtain was ripped aside.

Alphys shrieked and jumped back, grabbing Undyne's shaving razor and brandishing it like a sword.

In reply, Undyne laughed and plucked it from her hand, taking hold of that hand, instead, and pulling herself into the bathtub using it.

Alphys stared at her, finally _seeing_ her, and the moment she understood what Undyne was doing – and indeed, what she was _not_ wearing – Alphys began to pull on her, bringing up another laugh from her – and making Alphys grow dizzy with sudden, excited heat.

This happened often between them, but not always because of Undyne; while she did start things the majority of times, Alphys had her fair share of marks on the wall, and had proven herself to be _very_ thirsty, indeed – and for Undyne, alone.

This time was no different. In fact, thanks to the circumstances, this time was almost _inevitable_.

Alphys snaked her slippery arms up and around Undyne's slender neck, her hands burying into her water-thickened hair and grabbing hold. Undyne’s eye closed halfway when she felt that, swallowing hard, and Alphys licked her own lips – and tugged, very gently, on Undyne's hair, watching her face closely.

Undyne's eye fluttered closed, her cheeks flooding with red and her entire body shuddering with shock. She moved deeper into Alphys's arms, burying her face into her wife’s neck, and even as she felt Alphys tug again, trying to gently pull her away, Undyne refused – and instead sunk her teeth into Alphys's shoulder.

Alphys gasped and jerked back, her eyes wide but blind, and her hands fumbled, seeking steadier hold. Undyne hurriedly reached up and pulled those hands from her hair and slid them to her own back, and instantly, she felt Alphys's claws bit into her skin – just as Undyne's fangs bit into Alphys's.

Monsters could be rough with sex, their nature making it almost inevitable, even in the most kind and gentle of the species. While humans could be just as rough – if sometimes rougher – monsters were not only _better_ at it, but better at it with _each_ _other_. Their very nature, the evolution it required to survive the circumstances they did, required a sharper edge in order to survive those harsh, inhumane (literally) conditions.

Therefore, monsters knew how to take pleasure in rough play.

Between the two of them, this wasn't even their roughest; _that_ had involved the Dreemurr's guest bathroom and a generous bottle of human champagne one hazy New Year’s Eve.

But still, when Alphys shrank down and tilted her head back – and to the side, exposing more neck, Undyne growled when she grazed her teeth higher, feeling Alphys's claws scrape down her back. They always tried very hard not to break blood, especially in visible places and on school nights, but sometimes, turtlenecks saved a great deal of questions, instead of bothering with such effort.

Undyne pressed Alphys harder against the wall, feeling her wife's body welcome her, relax around and with her own, and it felt wonderful. She held Alphys close, her sharp bites becoming gentle, loving nibbles, and Alphys moaned, her hands going down and smoothing their palms over Undyne's backside – and then grabbing hold.

Undyne grunted, heat making her wet in deeper places, and she knew she couldn't take much more of this. But before she could take charge, Alphys did something completely unusual: she reached up and grabbed Undyne's head, then pulled it from her neck, so that both her eyes met Undyne's.

When they did, both were trembling and panting with need, both so eager that Undyne couldn't hold back a few impatient growls, her heart racing the longer Alphys looked at her.

But then… there was something _else_ in Alphys's eyes, something Undyne couldn't quite catch, and she wasn't sure if it was sadness, fear – or an emotion she had yet to know, even after all of this time with her.

Alphys stared at her, holding her face between her hands, and said nothing for quite some time, Undyne emulating her in her shock.

Then, Alphys whispered, “Undyne, I love you. And that also means I trust you. Do you understand me?”

_Now_ Undyne really did understand: Alphys was still haunted by that dream, but also felt guilty about it – about doubting _her_, Undyne, and her fidelity, over a silly dream – and was saying sorry.

Undyne didn't want a sorry, didn't need one – but she _did_ need _Alphys_.

As soon as Alphys saw that desire, one she _still_ barely understood or accepted, she knew she could do what she yearned to and know she was free of guilt. With a wild smile, she grabbed Undyne’s shoulders and turned them both around, so that Alphys was the one who pinned Undyne against the wall. Alphys was right against her before she could even catch her breath, but when Alphys kissed her and continued to steal that breath, she no longer cared.

Alphys reached between them, and anticipation made Undyne squirm, opening her thighs so that Alphys could touch between them as fast as possible – and in seconds, Undyne got her wish, and felt Alphys dip two fingers slowly but firmly between the soft fur and slick folds hidden there, and Undyne had to grab onto her, her knees becoming jelly the second she registered that sensation.

For quite some time, Alphys simply took time and pleasured Undyne this way, eager to watch her _feel_ it, to be able to hear her whisper for Alphys, to feel her body tighten or buck and sway against Alphys"s own, especially her hand.

Soon, Undyne's shaking hands began to wander, and when she lowered her head to capture one of Alphys’s nipples between her lips, her own hand was now between Alphys's legs, and it was Alphys who almost collapsed, that time.

They laughed, the feeling both thrilled and silly. But when Undyne tried to take charge, again, Alphys kept her in place, making her eye blaze with a heat so rarely seen – but so delicious to be the target of.

Undyne pulled at Alphys, spreading her own legs and leading Alphys completely between them, shifting their limbs into a complicated but pleasant tangle once they could find a way how.

It was only when Undyne set her foot upon the ridge of the top, and sat Alphys straddled upon it, did they find equilibrium – because at the same time, Undyne could shift herself forward, too, and feel friction against one of Alphys’s legs in the same way - with Alphys's hand helping if need be.

But again, Alphys simply slid herself along Undyne's thigh, until they were pressed as close against the other as possible.

And only then, when she was certain that she had control, did Alphys begin to move.

Undyne cried out, grabbing her and holding onto her tight, burying her face back into her neck and resuming her biting – but harder. Alphys grunted, her eyes rolling up and closing and her head tilting back, before she moved one of her arms back under Undyne's and sank her claws into her back, her other hand at Undyne's thigh.

Undyne laughed hoarsely, shivering, and before Alphys could even try to bring her hand between them, Undyne began to move them _both_ faster – and suddenly, the game grew serious - and her hand, needless.

The entire time, they clung onto each other, as if they stood upon a cliff and needed to keep stuck this way until they were rescued – only their bodies danced beneath the cooling water, bringing cries and moans and scraped skin and scales…

But most of all, it brought pleasure, _deep_ pleasure, a kind that Alphys loved, _always_ loved, and even _craved_ at times.

Even when Alphys had already come once, and Undyne knew it, they didn't stop, shocking Undyne. Alphys simply slowed a little, then, when she could, moved fast, again, making Undyne laugh with joy and join her – until this time, it was _she_ who felt that bliss, that joy, that seconds-long high…

Then, as if dropped, the two clung tight as their body’s sagged against the other's, both panting for breath and feeling _very_ hot, despite the now-cold water.

When they noticed, both chuckled weakly, but didn't move – _couldn't_ move – until their hearts allowed their breaths to slow alongside them. Then, gently, they helped each other actually shower, using each second to relish in how pleasurable simply _touching_ each other was, now.

They never stopped touching, kept their bodies pressed close, and when they were done, and the water was off, they hugged tight, all in silence.

Undyne was silent for a good reason, but it wasn't for the same reason as Alphys. She knew that Alphys had likely initiated that sex from guilt, but while she also knew that Alphys never had sex without wanting to, she could still sense that guilt.

Alphys felt that she had no right to mistrust Undyne.

But Undyne knew it wasn't like _that_, not really. Rather, it was more like Alphys knew that Undyne never would, but was so used to betrayal that she still tried to protect herself from it – even when there was none to be found, only _implied_ – and usually at a stretch.

Undyne actually knew, even if Alphys did not, that Alphys _did_ trust her. She knew, because Alphys trusted her with her _body_ – and that was _not_ something one did if they mistrusted their partner or expected them to cheat.

No, Alphys was just spooked, and Undyne understood that.

Even as she felt Alphys slowly begin to comb Undyne's hair with her claws, making her sigh deeply, she understood.

She always would.


	4. Chapter 4

Once they were dressed and ready to go, as they did very morning, Undyne and Alphys walked to school, and thus, to work.

This brilliance was thanks to Frisk, and likely Frisk alone. They'd worked hard to make it so that the monsters seemed less like invaders and more like immigrants, content to live apart but together until the humans grew more accustomed to their return.

As such, what looked like segregation in disguise was actually progress, because Frisk also made a point to live within the growing town, one slowly building out and around MT Ebott. Because they did this – _and_ chose to live with Toriel as their mother – the humans found no reason _not_ to visit. In turn, this allowed monsters to visit human places, and pretty soon, things began to mingle.

When monsters began to permanently move above, they'd chosen to build their houses close together, both accustomed to their new shared lives and eager for safety in numbers. This also meant, however, that Frisk had to work with the humans to give them the rights to that land. Doing so meant making it at least a tiny little village, and that meant several things needed to built: a post office, a municipal building, a general store – and a school.

Toriel was beyond delighted when she was told the school was _her_ job, and she proved herself beyond worthy of the appointment. Despite no longer being a Queen in name and title, she was one within those walls – and soon, their town – and slowly, the school became their unofficial epicentre. For decades, she had always played pretend Headmistress, so once she became one in truth, she shone – and ruled.

And soon, Asgore won back her heart.

That had also been thanks to Frisk – but also Undyne, who was tired of both listening to him whine about it, as well as constantly crashing at her place and clamjamming her and Alphys without realising (til too late). They'd helped him break through Toriel's stubborn wall, and once she'd ripped into him for his sins, she also cleaned his wounds – and asked him to come home.

Just like that.

By now, their relationship had blossomed, and as the two approached the main pathway to the school, they could already see Asgore at work: this morning, he was cleaning and trimming the sidewalks.

Alphys hesitated when she saw that, her hand gripping onto Undyne's tightly. The entire walk had felt wonderful – _normal_ – and had allowed Alphys to completely forget about her horrible dream, enough to pretend it had been nothing more but stale cola.

Upon seeing Asgore taking special care to maintain the sidewalk, however, she felt that nervousness come back, and she only knew why when she heard Undyne voice it.

“Yo,” she called to Asgore, bringing Alphys with her as she grinned and went to him. He smiled back and stopped, sighing in relief, before Undyne let Alphys go to hug him, and he, to hug her.

“Howdy,” he replied cheerfully, patting the top of her head before letting her go.

Undyne's grin widened as she pulled back, her arm still around his waist, and their eyes met.

“How are you two today?”

Asgore's eyes met Alphys's, and she jumped, blushing. She looked away, closing her mouth.

Undyne, luckily, missed it. "Great!” she replied. “Why are you doing that? Are we expecting guests?”

Asgore smiled – but he also looked up, humming nonsense under his breath before winking to Alphys – who tried to wink back (and failed).

“Come _on,”_ Undyne growled, her eye narrowing and her nails sinking into his back. Since he wore only a light coat over a lighter shirt, the old king winced and chuckled, tapping her feet lighting with the bristles of the broom.

“Who can say?” was all he'd reply, even when she resorted to nagging – then whining.

Each time, Asgore tried to bring Alphys into what was obviously a game, but all Alphys could feel, with each answer, was increasing dread.

She didn’t want an answer. She didn’t want to hear it.

“Undyne, we'll be late,” she broke in quickly, her eyes going to her wife's.

Undyne looked back and frowned, wanting to pout, but she paused, instead, her frown worried. Alphys looked pale and uneasy, like she wanted to bolt.

She nodded, giving Asgore a loud kiss on his cheek – making him blush and laugh shyly – before she took Alphys's hand back and led her back down the walkway, the area as close to spotless as possible.

Once inside, Undyne stopped Alphys, pulling her into one of the empty classrooms and closing the door. She turned to her, taking her hands, and looked into her eyes, her own flicking between them.

“Alphy,” she murmured, squeezing her cold hands. “What’s up?”

Alphys swallowed hard. She didn't want to be _that_ kind of wife, the kind constantly paranoid of being cheated on, the kind that was guarded and jealous of her wife's beauty.

She wanted to be _proud_ of it, not afraid of it.

She wanted to feel lucky, not _dread_.

“The-the dream,” she stammered without meaning to, disarmed by how Undyne looked at her – always looked at her.

Luckily, all Undyne needed was that, and her eye relaxed, as did her expression. That made sense, she knew. Alphys was sensitive, somehow seeing Undyne as some kind of exotic beauty, and she didn't get it. She knew that she looked like what she was: a beaten-up old soldier, one riddled with scars made preparing for a war that never happened, and now never would – and was _glad_ of it.

But she knew Alphys did not see her that way. _She_ saw beauty where Undyne was convinced none existed – just like Undyne saw beauty within Alphys, where _she_ seemingly knew none could ever exist…

It wasn't fair, Undyne knew, and she hated it. It was the only thing she hated about Alphys: her own hatred for herself.

“I know it _felt_ real,” Undyne whispered, dropping to her knees before Alphys and keeping hold of her still-cold hands.

Alphys bit her lip and tried to pull back, but Undyne refused to let her, and pulled her back – to herself.

“I _do,”_ Undyne insisted, once Alphys was safely still within her arms, and she looked up at her. “I know what dreams like that can do to a mind. But it _wasn't_ real, baby. It wasn’t, and it _won't be,_ okay?”

Alphys closed her eyes, her throat closed up with tears.

She wanted to believe that, so much…

“Hey,” Undyne called, her voice wavering with real worry. “Alphy, I mean it. Do you hear me?”

“Yes,” Alphys agreed weakly.

“Then believe me,” Undyne concluded.

Alphys stared at her, her eyes searching Undyne's, and all she could see was her beloved's sincerity. It made her tear up, and she nodded, almost dropping to her own knees – only to find herself caught by Undyne and held close.

“I got you,” Undyne whispered, and Alphys nodded again, closing her eyes. _“I always will.”_

This time, Alphys chose to believe her, and she clung tight.

* * *

_“Durrhurr,”_ Alphys sighed, her voice flat with annoyance – mostly. “Very cute, human, but you still have to raise a hand before speaking - even if all you say is rubbish.”

Frisk laughed – as did the rest of the class, and as a result, so did Alphys. It was a good joke, one that Frisk had caught her in, and even _she_ could appreciate it. Besides, she knew Frisk, knew the human teased only with love, and never venom. She would always reply in kind, which was what made their relationship so much fun in the first place.

“Does anyone have a _real_ answer, one that _doesn't_ insult me?” Alphys asked mildly – and just as she planned it, the bell rang as a response. Even more laughter followed, lifting her heart. She nodded and waved at her students her dismissal, and they left, most with smiles upon their faces.

Frisk stayed behind, their eyes dancing bright. “Lunch?”

Alphys grinned, lighting tapping their nose with the stack of papers she held. “Lunch,” she agreed.

The two packed up their things, Alphys locked the classroom up, and together, the two walked down the now-crowded hallways of their somewhat-modest school – by now, to them both, a second home.

This also happened almost every day, Frisk's insistence to eat lunch with their monster friends, especially over any other friends they made from their peers.

Frisk was an odd human in that regard, keen on the company of adults above those their own age (save perhaps a monster kid of two). It was fair; their mind was rather far ahead than most humans their age, whether from experience, self-education, or both: it didn't matter. Their company was always welcome, and not _just_ because their last name was now, legally, Dreemurr.

Frisk was genuinely fun company, so to spend lunchtime with them was never a chore, least of all to Alphys. Even now, she could still glance at the human and feel _awe_ at the reality that yes, this person was indeed her friend, despite how gross she'd treated them as a greeting. Now, she felt that Frisk was one of very few people who actually _saw_ her as she was, and still somehow loved her for it. That kind of thing was rare, and she knew how painful it was to lose.

She didn't want to lose Frisk, too.

Undyne greeted Alphys around the corner by scooping her up into her arms – and Alphys let her, throwing her arms around her in return. This was also rather routine, but especially today, that made it no less fun.

Lunch was well-met that day, save the distracted look on Toriel's face as they ate and conversed together. She kept checking her phone and answering messages, her eyes flashing with keen excitement each time, but whenever questioned, she refused to say a thing, instead smiling mysteriously and pressing the phone to her lips.

It was Alphys's only warning, and she had no notion of it until much too late.

* * *

Strangely, not long before the end of lunch, Toriel disappeared. Even Asgore was surprised, and he knew more than all of them combined.

But soon, after the bell rang, and they'd parted to make way for classes, they heard her voice over the PA: _“Good afternoon, everyone. Please make way to the gymnasium in an orderly fashion with your next period's teacher. There is an assembly in fifteen minutes. Thank you, kindly!"_

That was it.

And while it made Alphys’s students murmur excitedly and scramble to their feet, she felt the blood from her face drain away, replaced with nauseated dizziness. Half-heartedly, she called out to her unruly students and imposed order, before carefully leading them out of the classroom, joining the similar lines of students exiting in the same way.

Already waiting there was Undyne's class, having gone their first and found their own lesson cancelled rather suddenly – including Undyne. She met Alphys at the back of the gymnasium once all the students had filed in and sat down, and Alphys only noticed once she felt Undyne's arm slide around her shoulders and pull her close.

Alphys bit her lip, but also leaned into Undyne's embrace, unable to mask any of her feelings, now. She was shaking, her mouth dry and her eyes wide, because despite her height, despite the heights of others, and despite the distance, she had somehow caught a glimpse, of a figure seated behind Toriel, barely visible for that purpose…

…and felt her entire heart drop into her stomach, where it was now being slowly eaten up by anxious reflux, making her queasy.

“Hey,” Undyne whispered, worry striking her when she saw Alphys's face, as well as felt her trembling. “What's wrong? Was your food bad? Are you okay? Should we leave?”

But Alphys only heard the first question, because as Undyne asked, Toriel had stood up and walked to the podium, where she took hold of the microphone set up and adjusted it, then cleared her throat into it. The sound instantly silenced everyone, even the teachers, as it always would. It was Toriel, after all.

“Hello, everyone!” she greeted happily, her bright red eyes going over the mass of faces before her and lighting up with delight. “I'm always happy to see all of you together, to see how we as a group have grown up here! Progress is something to always be celebrated, and progress is what has brought you all here, today.”

Alphys stared at her, mentally pleading with her to stop, to cancel the assembly, to please at least let her run away and hide, and take Undyne with her…

“As we grow, so do our needs, and as such, I have been granted an opportunity, a unique one: the chance to not only hire another teacher, but one meant for a specific, newly-historical subject, one that could _only_ be taught here, under this roof, and within these walls.”

By now, even Frisk was staring at Toriel with surprise – something that further shocked both Undyne and Alphys.

Had Toriel not even told _Frisk_ what this was about? Or had she left details out, to surprise her adopted child?

“A new teacher?” Undyne was muttering.

On her other side, Papyrus, who'd finally caught up to her, leaned closer, then nodded.

“Did _you_ know about this?” she asked him when he did.

He shook his head, and she frowned, looking disappointed.

Alphys, however, looked ahead, her vision becoming bordered with darkness. She stared at Toriel, barely felt Undyne touch her shoulder or ask her the same things.

_No,_ she begged Toriel, instead. _Don't do this to me. Please don't do this to me._

_Don't prove me right!_

But Toriel did.

“Therefore, it's with great honour and pleasure that I introduce our latest addition to our staff, Professor Lindsey Sekhmet.”

As Toriel spoke, a figure rose to their feet behind her, and Alphys suddenly went cold, her breaths stilling within her chest.

The person was a monster, similar to herself and Undyne, in a way that she looked almost humanoid, save for the features of an animal, this one a lioness. She was covered in short, honey-coloured fur, fur that was accented by the smart, well-cut suit she wore, its colour a blueish grey. Her face was also leonine, her rounded ears poking out from long, wavy golden hair, like a mane that spilt well over her shoulders. She was tall, slender, and graceful, and her smile was wide and well-fanged, and as she approached the podium amidst polite applause, she moved with easy grace.

In short, she was _beautiful_.

Alphys stood with her eyes wide, so wide they hurt, but she couldn't look away.

_This can't be real_, she begged silently, barely hearing the woman begin to speak, despite being painfully aware that even her voice was wonderful: deep, velvet, and melodic.

_This can't be real!_

_ Wake up, you fool! _

_Wake up, wake up, wake up!_

But she did not.

There was no question: it was her.

The woman from Alphys's dream.

The woman whom she'd seen kissing Undyne.

_I was right._


	5. Chapter 5

The entire time, Alphys said nothing. She did nothing. She barely even remembered if she could think or not.

All she could see was the woman standing at the podium, kissing her wife – and her wife reaching up with both hands, as if to grab hold—

“Alphy.”

She closed her eyes, but didn't answer, even when Undyne's fingers dug into her shoulder – hard. She'd said her name four times, already, and each time, Alphys found no words coming to her lips.

Undyne was starting to worry, and rightfully so; she was barely listening to what the professor was saying, and thus missed a crucial piece of information that would have benefited them both had she heard it first.

All she could hear was the way Alphys breathed: shakily, fast, and without pausing; all she could see was how pale Alphys's complexion became, the longer the new teacher spoke.

In many ways, Undyne didn't want to ask, didn't want the answer to what she _needed_ to ask. She was scared to, as if caught doing something wrong, when in truth, she'd done nothing – and neither had their new staff member.

But she also knew Alphys, better than she knew anyone else in the world, by now – even Papyrus. She could see the answers all over her face.

So she went quiet and simply moved closer to Alphys, making sure that she knew she was there. Alphys twitched at first, as though about to move, but when Undyne's hands held onto both of her shoulders, she sagged, and was soon leaning against her, shivering.

By then, the speech had ended, and the entire room erupted into rather cheerful applause. Both women looked up, surprised to find that many pairs (and other various numbers) of eyes were on them, and instead of enjoying the attention, like they knew they should, it only made them both feel worse.

But before they could even talk about it, Toriel was dragging them toward the staff room, eagerly chatting with Papyrus, who was still at Undyne's other side. She heard nothing, could only hear Alphys's teeth start to click together, and she wondered if she needed to get Alphys to the nurse's station – or a hospital – instead.

By the time she'd decided – _hospital_ – she found herself led away from Alphys, and Alphys moved to sit down by Asgore, who'd clearly caught her mood and wanted to help.

Undyne almost snarled at Toriel to let her go, as she wanted to be the one to help Alphys, when suddenly, she found herself face-to-face with the source of her wife's sudden grief.

And when her eye darted between the other woman's pair of golden eyes, she found herself disarmed; she found no threat within them, no source of fear or dread or reason to fight her. Those eyes warmed up and widened, and before she knew it, her hand was suddenly held.

“Hello!” she said, smiling widely. “You're Captain Undyne!”

Undyne nodded, then seemed to snap awake. She blinked hard, then stood up taller, smoothing back her ponytail and grasping onto the hand that held her own in return.

“Hey,” she agreed, “welcome to the school. You met everyone yet?”

Lindsey nodded slowly, her long hair curling forward around her face, and a few strands got caught in her whiskers – without her notice; she was smiling too hard.

She also had yet to let go of Undyne's hand.

“I've been waiting to meet _you_ most of all,” Lindsey elaborated, her voice deeper than it had sounded over a speaker, and more melodic. “For reasons I’m sure Queen Toriel has already told you about.”

“Headmistress,” Toriel corrected, reminding them both of her presence. “And actually, I've left that for _you_, Lindsey: that is, if you don't already know?”

Undyne shook her head. “Know what? Am I fired?” She narrowed her eye at Toriel. “Did you hire her as my replacement?”

Instead of being offended, Lindsey laughed as though charmed, and Undyne looked back at her, more confused than anything else.

“I’m not here to teach gym,” she corrected. “I'm hear to teach _you_.”

Undyne stared at her. “You're here to do what now?”

Lindsey laughed again, and this time, Alphys raised her head. The entire time, she'd held it in her hands, her eyes closed and her mind trying to defend her ears, so she wouldn't have to hear the words that would seduce Undyne away from her.

But of course it failed, and when Alphys heard this, she startled Asgore beside her, who'd been trying to get her to talk to him.

Alphys rose to her feet, deciding that she needed to hear this, although with each step, she felt her body grow shakier and shakier. She couldn't help it; the closer the got, the more beauty she saw, and beside Undyne, even she could see that they both shared a similar kind of it: wild, fierce, and untamed, matched peers in all, especially looks…

Undyne, the second Alphys was close enough, yanked her hand free of Lindsey's and grabbed one of Alphys's, pulling her close.

Alphys raised her chin to look up at her, to at least meet the source of her foretold future agony in the eye, to at least see her enemy as who she _really_ was: someone sneaky, vindictive, and _evil_…

But Lindsey greeted her with a warm smile, reaching out to shake her hand, too. Granted, it was with less enthusiasm, but at least Alphys was already used to that, accustomed to being secondary to Undyne's popularity.

So, as evenly as she could, Alphys met her gaze right on and said, “Miss Sekhmet, what was it you said you were hired to teach?”

“It's Lindsey,” was the answer, “and like I said--,” and here, her eyes returned to Undyne's and remained there. “—_you_.”

“We need more,” Undyne answered.

Lindsey nodded, dropping Alphys's hand and reaching into one of her coat pockets, bringing out her phone. “I _should_ start from the beginning,” she was saying, her fingers – thick, lightly-padded fingers with sheathed claws at the tips – flying over her phone's screen. “You see, it was you... two... who inspired me to become a teacher in the first place – you, Captain--,”

Her eyes went back to Alphys's, just long enough to add, “—and enough to know who _you_ are, too: the Royal Scientist, Alphys.” Her eyes darted back to Undyne's, and she grinned. “I'm a _huge_ fan.”

“Really?” Alphys blurted out.

"Definitely,” Lindsey agreed. “It's an honour to be working with the former Royal Scientist and the Captain of the Royal Guard. It's like a dream come true!”

Alphys couldn't stop herself from making a face at that last comment, hoping it was _anything but_ a dream come true. She turned away to hide it, pretending to cough, before she looked back.

"Well, _that_ was a while ago; things are different now, and better for it," Alphys murmured, holding onto Undyne’s hand a little tighter.

"It's still amazing to think I'm talking to the same warrior I'll be teaching a lesson about,” Lindsey replied easily.

"_Whoa_, wait, _that's_ what you meant? You'll be teaching a lesson about _me_?" Undyne demanded, looking shocked by the very idea of it. “Wasn't it supposed to be _history_?”

"It _is!_ Your story is an inspiration to monsters everywhere, and has changed the course of our personal – and now, with the humans, _collective_ – histories, forever," Lindsey explained, looking pleased that she was finally able to. “You worked your way from _nothing_, Captain, to become the most powerful monster in the entire Underground.”

“I wouldn't go _that_ far--,” Undyne tried to protest, blushing a little; she hated being complimented so publicly. "Asgore--,"

“And yet you still had the strength to know not to kill when you had the chance,” Lindsey was concluding. “You're a role model, a living historical figure, and I meant it: it's an honour to be able to tell your story as a lesson."

Undyne felt herself blushing deeper at this, and she looked down at her feet. shifting from one, then the other, a bit awkwardly. She had no clue what to say to such a thing.

Luckily, she didn't have to; Toriel had returned, taking hold of Lindsey by her arm and whisking her away to meet the other teachers around the room.

Briefly, Alphys caught Lindsey looking back over her shoulder, looking past herself - and right at Undyne, her expression obvious and clear.

_Longing_.

But before Alphys could say a word, she'd turned around, and the opportunity was lost.


	6. Chapter 6

During the day, amidst all of the excitement, Undyne let herself forget the badness of the morning, instead focussing on her growing excitement. She couldn't help herself: the idea of someone like Lindsey not only admiring _her_, but enough to want to teach future generations her life story… it was flattering. It was interesting.

It was _exciting_.

And Lindsey was a fun, friendly person. The rest of their group took to her almost as quickly as Undyne had, and it didn't go over her notice. In fact, she let that safety cloud her worry over, and instead of grey, she could only see silver. They, too, were excited for Undyne, and she felt pride, a kind she hadn't felt in many, many years.

She’d missed it, deserved to feel that way, she knew. She relished in it, had fun with it.

And she used it to let her forget.

But Alphys, watching from far away, sometimes literally, sometimes only in her dark imagination, did not forget. _She_ watched her friends – her chosen, beloved new family, loving them like she never knew she could love _anyone_ – fall charmed under the newcomer, and it hurt her. She felt as if she were being challenged, as if having Lindsey here brought into question her own rights.

And that charm was almost powerful enough to make Alphys actually believe she should just surrender and spare what would clearly be a fight.

Except… Lindsey showed no signs of such a thing. She showed no indication of wanting to take over, lest of all anything Alphys was in charge of. She seemed genuinely interested in Undyne, as a subject as well as a person, as a woman as well as a monster, and though Alphys was certain she would, she saw no threat anywhere in anything Lindsey did, that day.

So she let Undyne forget the morning, the night before. She saw Undyne's eye gleam with pride as well as shyness, and was happy for her, knew she deserved such worship, and didn’t stand in Lindsey's way.

Her first mistake.

* * *

That night, when they sat down to eat, Undyne chattered excitedly, her eye bright and her cheeks pink, her hands moving between mouthful of dinner and words.

"Can you _believe_ that?” she cried, “Lindsey is gonna teach a lesson using _my_ life story?! I mean, damn – I've met a couple of fans, before, sure, but _this_?”

Alphys braced herself.

However, Undyne surprised her. She frowned a little into her plate. “It's a bit much.”

Alphys sighed. She knew that look, knew what it meant, and thus knew what Undyne needed; support, _unmitigated_ support, and she knew she could give it honestly.

Despite her fears and misgivings, she still wanted this for Undyne, and knew Undyne deserved it.

She just wished it was someone _else_ teaching it.

Alphys looked down at her half eaten plate of food, feeling her stomach curdle, before she barely choked the words out. "She's right, Undyne: you _are_ a role model.” She inhaled, and suddenly, the words were easier because they were real. “You _do_ deserve this, Undyne.”

"So are you, Alphy, and so do you!” Undyne suddenly protested, looking genuinely offended. “You are just as much a role model as I could ever be!"

But Alphys was snorting, shaking her head and shrugging. The idea was ludicrous to her.

"Yes, you are,” Undyne insisted sharply, as if Alphys had spoken aloud. “You're a inspiration to nerds, everywhere!”

Alphys knew Undyne was teasing. She really did – especially when Undyne laughed and planted a loud kiss on the very tip of her nose before resuming her meal.

But it still hurt.

And though she tried to keep it to herself, she didn't even make it to bedtime before she spoke up.

It was her second mistake.

* * *

As they were lying down and about to shut the lights off for bed, Alphys suddenly spoke out, her voice sharp and angry, “I _warned_ you about her.”

Undyne blinked, her eye widening from the tone of her voice, until she finally understood the words that were being said. “Wait, what? So you're saying that _she's_ the chick from your dream?”

_“I warned you,”_ Alphys insisted, refusing to look at her, now. She’d had to put up with listening to people wax on about how _wonderful_ Lindsey was, including during the entire duration of her own dinner within her own home. She honestly felt like she had held her tongue for _too_ long, and was angry that Undyne not only forgot, but seemed upset that she was being reminded.

“Alphy, you met her, same as I did,” Undyne said, keeping her voice even, though inside, she was hurt. She thought Alphys was happy for her. She had said she'd deserved it, after all. “She only has _academic_ interest in me! I'm like an _anime_ to her.”

Alphys felt her cheeks burn. “It's _not_ the same thing. Undyne, she looks exactly like the woman who kissed you in my dream. It _was_ premonition; we both know it, now!”

“Did we really meet the same person?” Undyne answered, feeling anger spark up within herself. “She had nothing but nice things to say about you. And okay, yes: you clearly had a premonition about her. But are you sure that – maybe? – that same inkling got mixed up in paranoid dreams of your own?”

“I… I-I'm _not_ paranoid!” Alphys snapped, her tail flicking angrily, now. She had turned her back to Undyne as she'd spoken, and was glad she did.

“Then what is this, Alphy?” Undyne cried, that hurt making her anger spread. “I thought you were happy for me. I thought you agreed I deserve this. Are… are you _jealous_ or something?”

Alphys felt her whole body flush with furious heat, and her tail went rigid, feeling her hands start to tremble alongside that anger. It choked her, silenced her, and in turn, it spurred Undyne on.

“That's it, isn't it?” Undyne snapped, sitting up and turning to her, angry that she wasn't even facing her. “You _are_ jealous! I know you have your issues, but _this? This_ was a side of you I _never_ thought you had!”

Now Alphys was the one hurt, again, and her eyes burned, filling with humiliated tears. Perhaps she was jealous, but not of Undyne's success, like she thought. She _was_ jealous, because she knew that if Lindsey wanted Undyne, and Undyne wanted her, then Alphys had no hope of competition. She was not beautiful, not even pretty. At best, she could be called cute, and that was at the _very_ best.

If one wasn't Undyne, that was.

“Alphy!” Undyne cried, reaching out and grabbing hold of her shoulder hard. “Don't you trust me?!”

“Of course I do!” Alphys burst out right away, her voice broken and choked – but still understandable. “It's not about trust!”

“Then what is this about, Alphy?!”

Alphys tried to explain. She tried to find the words. But instead, all she got out was, “I'm scared!”

For once, it was the right answer, as Undyne immediately lost her anger, seeing it as the truth – and feeling her heart ache in response. She knew Alphys had a painful past, knew it was so hard for her to trust, and knew how easily it was to find the very act of trusting scary.

So she went quiet, and instead of saying a word, she simply curled up behind Alphys and held her close, her arms wrapped around her waist and her legs around one of her own.

Alphys burst into tears, the feel of that physical comfort like a punch to the gut, and she grabbed hold of those arms hard, burying her face into one forearm and crying her heart out, yearning to keep Undyne's arms around her forever, no matter what happened…

Instead, she cried herself to sleep, and with a heavy heart, Undyne turned the lights off – and held her until she, too, had fallen asleep beside her.

* * *

Later that night, the same dream returned, and Alphys managed to startle herself wake without waking up Undyne at the same time. Her jump did make her wife stir, but when Alphys used it to slip out of her grasp, Undyne was none-the-wiser, and fell back asleep, oblivious.

Trembling and soaked in cold sweat, Alphys grabbed a spare pillow, her phone, and her glasses, before she quickly darted out of the room and closed the door behind her.

Without looking back, she tiptoed to the sofa, pulled it out into a couch-bed, and curled up upon it, shivering with chattering teeth despite feeling like she was burning up with fever.

_Again, that same passionate kiss…_

_Again, Undyne's surprise, her reaching up, her hands shaking…_

Alphys buried her face into her pillow and started crying, making sure to be as quiet as she possibly could, her entire body breaking out into more cold sweats and blazing heat waves. She couldn't bear to sleep in the same bed with Undyne, not after such a horrible conversation, and even though all she wanted was Undyne, she knew better than to go back.

This was better. She was punishing herself, not Undyne.

She _thought_.

* * *

The next morning, Undyne woke alone, only this time, she was not greeted with any delicious smells, or any sense of happiness. She reached out and felt Alphys's side of the bed was cold, and her eye opened.

Her stomach sank, momentary confusion slowly giving away to dreaded memory and understanding: the fight last night, the one that had her accusing Alphys of jealousy, and in turn making her cry herself into exhausted sleep.

It wasn’t as if they'd never fought before – all couples had their share of spats and blow-outs, and as gross as they could be romantically, they also knew how to fight.

But Alphys had never run away, before.

Undyne felt nausea sweep through her, and she scrambled to her feet, throwing herself out of the bedroom and darting out into the hallway, her eye suddenly on the door, her mind Underground—

Until Alphys raised her head, and Undyne turned toward it – and found her on the sofabed.

Relief warred with anger inside of Undyne for a moment, but when their eyes met, relief won. She went right over, moving to lie down next to Alphys, and her wife sat up, throwing the couch's blanket over her own shoulders.

Undyne knelt beside her, instead.

Alphys didn't move, didn't even look up at her.

Undyne reaching over and touched Alphys's pale cheek, leaning forward to kiss her lips, but Alphys moved her head away, and Undyne merely kissed cheek.

Alphys couldn't look at her, anymore, after that, because when she saw that look upon Undyne's face, she saw it aimed not at herself – but at Lindsey, as if the other monster sat behind her. She stared down at her hands, focussing on her wedding ring, but those images replayed, and she shuddered, sniffling hard.

The cold shoulder increased Undyne's fear as well as hurt, and she didn't even know what to make of it.

Of all the years she'd ever known Alphys, she'd never treated Undyne like this, before, and it was a side of her she didn't like – because it scared her.

“Alphy,” she whispered, as if to speak normally would make her vanish. “Why are you out here? Were you sick?”

It was a fair question: they'd bought the sofabed specifically for Alphys to use when she needed to either stay up later than Undyne, or if she was “sick” – what she called her depressed insomnia. Either way, she woke Undyne before she left, so she would know.

That was what made _this_ instance so strange.

Alphys shook her head, before nodding – then wincing, lowering her head and hiding her face behind her hands.

“I dreamt it, again,” she then whispered back, her voice breaking. “You, her… passion… me, aside… _Undyne_…?”

That last word was almost a question, masked within a sob, but Undyne understood it, anyway.

This time, when she tried to get closer, Alphys let her, so that in no time, she was holding her close – and Alphys clung tight.

“Undyne,” she blurted out, “Please, listen to me, please! Don't… don't trust her! If you do, what I saw will… what I saw--!”

“Alphy, we talked about this last night!” Undyne protested. “Yes, I agree that you had a premonition about Lindsey, but come on! I love _you_! Why the hell would I ever kiss anyone else, least of all some hyper fangirl?! The rest of what you saw was _fear_, Alphy! _Just_ fear!”

“No!” Alphys protested, and this time, she raised her head, her desperate eyes going to Undyne's. “Undyne, _please_! I don’t want to lose you! I-I know I’m not good enough, that I don't deserve you, but-but, _please_\--!”

“Alphys, shut up,” Undyne growled. “Stop saying shit like that to me. God, I _hate_ it!”

Alphys flinched.

“You deserve me, and you're good enough for me!” Undyne corrected angrily. “_I_ decide these things, too! And if you want me, and you're not gonna hurt me, then perfect! We're on the same page!”

“But, the premonition--,”

“It was mixed up in a dream,” Undyne insisted, “and it _won't happen.”_

_“Yet,”_ Alphys added dejectedly. “It hasn't happened, _yet_. It hasn't, but it will, and the wait is _killing_ me, Undyne!”

Her voice broke, and she lowered her head again, her shoulders shaking.

“No, Alphys, it _won't_ happen!” Undyne finally shouted, losing her temper. She was frustrated and hurting, and needing this to stop.

_Didn't Alphys just say that she trusted me?_

“It won't _ever_ happen! How can you believe a stupid fucking _dream_ _over me?!”_

Alphys went still and silent at that, stunned. She didn't know how to answer that, and she looked away, ashamed. She wanted to believe Undyne, and in her heart, she did. But she didn't trust _Lindsey_, trusted her even less knowing that she was real, and would be close to Undyne for months, now.

If anything, Alphys felt as if the _more_ she spoke, the more she set out to self-fulfill her damned vision, herself. She knew she was being awful, was pushing Undyne away instead of keeping her close, like she really wanted, and she hated herself for it.

But she saw no other way.

Undyne was about to speak, the quiet starting to be too much for her, but instead, Alphys again burst into tears – just like she had the night before: with violent, gut-wrenching cries of dismay.

Undyne bit her lip and swallowed her words, instead moving to comfort her wife, but inside, her insides felt hot and jagged. She felt angry, still, that despite _claiming_ to trust her, Alphys clearly did not, and Undyne knew she deserved to be trusted.

She didn't like that Alphys chose to believe a stupid dream over herself, but she didn't bring any of it up.

Instead, Undyne simply held Alphys to her in silence, slowly rocking her to comfort her through it.

She knew that if she said anything, now, she would only make it worse.

And that was Undyne's first major mistake.


	7. Chapter 7

Things did, somehow, seem to come to a kind of equilibrium with time.

Lindsey fit right in, both charming and genuine to everyone she spoke to, and the students looked up to her, as she spoke to them the same as she would to adults. In her spare time, she would either stay after school and volunteer for after-school programmes, or, when schedules aligned, spent time in the teachers' lounge with Undyne, learning more about her.

Those moments had been the hardest to calm down about.

The first time Lindsey asked, Alphys had been there, and she’d almost lost her temper, certain that it was a trick.

Undyne knew her wife, and knew how sensitive she was during this time, and suggested that Alphys joined them, so that she could add things to her story that Undyne might have missed.

And because Lindsey took it in stride and with no protest – and later, after, even a thank you – Alphys eventually had to admit that if Lindsey was up to something, she didn't seem quite poised to do it just yet.

A few times, Alphys would sometimes stumble into these meetings, as if _forgetting_ about them, or as if needing something urgently, and she expected to walk into her dream – her _nightmare_.

Each time she opened the door, she felt herself start to go numb – only to find the two women a table apart, a large spread of papers between them.

Neither ever looked guilty, and Undyne always lit up and invited Alphys in - and Lindsey agreed.

So eventually, Alphys managed to stop. She trusted Undyne, and needed her to know it.

But soon, after a week, Alphys noticed a change, and it alarmed her: no matter where she went, if she went to find Undyne, Lindsey was always there beside her.

At first, Alphys swallowed the first reason Lindsey provided, as Undyne not only confirmed it, but it did make sense: she was shadowing Undyne for a day or two, to make a record of her common daily activities, so that she could then compare them to what she now knew had been Undyne's old routine.

It did make sense, and though Alphys still felt sick whenever she saw her there, she believed her.

And because she trusted Undyne, she made no word of protest. She watched in silence, sometimes without being seen, as Undyne and Lindsey conversed, or Lindsey sat in the back row of Undyne's health class as she taught, in order to make notes of that, too, or when they walked between classes and chatted like old friends, about things Alphys and Undyne did not: sports, exercise, cooking, weapons-making…

Undyne seemed to be so happy to have a new friend, especially one that she could speak to as an equal. Sure, sometimes Lindsey complimented her to the point of making her blush, but it wasn't anything that made Undyne feel hit on, and she certainly didn't sense that kind of interest from Lindsey.

But soon, when Lindsey's time began to _interfere_ with Alphys's, Alphys could no longer stay quiet about it.

By the middle of her second week, Lindsey was eating lunches with them, she and Undyne spending their spare periods together, or even staying _after_ school.

Then, Alphys came home one night and found Lindsey _there_, sitting at her own table, eating food that was meant for _herself _and Undyne…

And that night, it broke Alphys's hold over her temper. She couldn't be silent, anymore.

By now, she could see it as plain as day within Lindsey's eyes: _she_ liked Undyne, _very_ much, and was clearly trying to get Undyne's affections in return.

* * *

“I'm sorry, _what?”_

Alphys bit her lip but didn't turn around, her hands buried into her pyjama drawer. She held onto several bunches of soft material within them as she struggled to repeat herself, as calmly as possible.

“I s-said,” she mumbled, “when are you going to tell her you're married? And married to me?”

Alphys knew it was a mean question, an unfair and hurtful accusation, but she was so angry by this point that she didn't care.

If it hurt Undyne, she reasoned, maybe she would understand how hurt _Alphys_ was feeling.

“That's what I thought I heard,” Undyne answered, her own voice low and quiet. “But I didn't think _my_ wife would _ever_ have to ask me such a stupid question, let alone in a way that makes me think she won't believe whatever answer I provide.”

Alphys flinched; she deserved that. She lowered her head, swallowing hard to prevent another lump from forming in her throat, and instead, her eyes filled with tears.

“I-I'm sorry,” she burst out, meaning it. “But what am else am I _supposed_ to think, when I come home and find her sitting in my own seat?!”

Undyne bit her lip. The truth was that Lindsey had invited _herself_ over, had made it seem like she'd only needed to stay a moment, but instead, she kept finding reasons to linger, until it was too late to put dinner on and _not_ ask her to stay.

Undyne knew it had been a bad idea, and had felt rather gross agreeing to it, but she still liked Lindsey, and wouldn't of minded her over for dinner - if she'd been able to plan for it. Though she felt trapped, she went along with it, because she didn't want to lose a friend over her own presumptions.

Besides, Lindsey had been so _casual_. She always was. She wasn't flirty, like most people tended to be around Undyne, but she also wasn't afraid to be honest, or tease Undyne, or even just randomly compliment her.

Undyne had honestly thought Lindsey would have been done her research by now, and now saw her a friend instead of a mere fan.

But that wasn't the right answer, Undyne knew. Not right now, and not like this.

“Alphy,” she began softly, and Alphys slowed her breathing as best as she could to hear her, _wanting_ to hear her – wanting to be told she was _wrong_, to be _comforted_…

“I'm sorry,” Undyne murmured, meaning it. “I should've texted you or something. I didn't think much of it, and I keep forgetting why you do. All she really wants is to be a good teacher, Alphy. It's like meeting a celebrity, and I know you get _that_.”

Alphys sighed. Of course she did; despite her somewhat-despised status by the general human (and some monster) populace, she was still know as one of the Ebott Seven: the seven people who broke the barrier and changed the world forever. 

Alphys was a celebrity, too.

But _this_ didn't feel like _that;_ not to Alphys. It felt deeper, more personal. She knew it wasn't just fear that made her see the affection within Lindsey's eyes, whenever they landed upon Undyne…

_Almost like… a hunger… a desperate, urgent hunger…_

Suddenly, she felt Undyne's hands upon her shoulders.

“Alphy,” Undyne whispered softly, her lips like feathers atop her head. “All _she_ is to _me_ is a fan, and that's all she's _gonna_ be, okay?”

But Alphys had to ask, anyway. “What about friends? You seem more like friends.”

Undyne bit her lip, then sighed. “Okay, yeah,” she confessed. “We're friends.”

She’d known it was a bad time to say it.

She had, and she said it, anyway.

It made Alphys grow cold, her vision darkening and her hold on her pyjamas growing tighter, harder, making claw bite through fabric and into skin…

“But that's _it_, Alphy,” Undyne was saying firmly, her hold on Alphys’s stiff shoulders moving down, slowly, along her arms. “_Just_ a friend, a fellow monster with a weird admiration complex. Once the sparkle wears off and she realises how boring I am, she'll find someone shinier and have a new topic for next year."

Alphys choked a little, a sound mixed between a weak laugh and a shaky sob, and soon, Undyne's hands found Alphys's, and were pulling them free – and into her own.

“_You_, my love,” Undyne whispered, as she turned her wife around to face her – and then hold her close. “You are my sun, my only source of light and warmth, and that's how I _want_ it to be.”

Alphys closed her eyes, burying her face into Undyne's chest and pressing her cheek between her breasts, listening to her heart.

Undyne smiled warmly, taking this as a good sign, and she gathered Alphys closer – and brought her to bed.

And for the rest of the night, Lindsey was completely forgotten.


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning was Thursday, and Alphys woke to both relief – _and_ nausea.

She frowned, realising the nausea had woken her up, but when she sat up and sipped some water, it gradually passed.

Gently, she woke up Undyne for the day, and when Undyne's eye opened and saw Alphys, it lit up – and Undyne grinned.

Instead of speaking, she simply grabbed Alphys's shoulders and dragged her back into bed.

Needless to say, both were late that morning, and it was worth it.

* * *

But that night, by the time Alphys had staggered in through the front door, only on her feet because Undyne kept her that way, she knew: she was _sick_. She shivered, coughing into her sleeve, and it sounded both dry and wet.

Undyne's heart wrenched, especially when Alphys almost fell over from the force of that cough, and at once, Undyne went into nurse mode. She scooped Alphys off of her feet and carried her into bed, buried her under some covers – and declared her too sick for school, and for the rest of the week.

Alphys burst into tears, dismayed by this declaration.

Tomorrow was the first game of their sporting season, the first time their little school was not only big enough to _have_ a sports team, but one that human teams from human schools were willing to compete against.

Undyne had been fighting for it for the entire time the school was open, and now, finally, she was _there_. They'd even spent the entire damned day together, whenever they could, to prepare for it.

Alphys was just as excited as Undyne, simply because she was excited _for_ Undyne.

The mood was slightly dampened when Lindsey joined in a few times, but each time she approached, Alphys sensed nothing threatening about her, and that look she'd sworn she'd always seen in those golden eyes was missing.

It allowed her to relax. To enjoy and have fun.

To let her guard down.

And now, not only was she sick and miserable, she would also be missing the biggest day in her wife's entire new career because of it.

Undyne bit her lip, then sat down on the bed in front of Alphys, grabbing onto her hands tight. “I'm staying home, tomorrow,” she added, her chin held high.

Alphys glared at her, shaking her head – then stopping herself, holding her head in her hands until the dizziness stopped. When it did, she felt her face being taken hold of, and when she looked up, Undyne stared back at her, her eye blazing bright and her face set.

“Fuck it,” Undyne added, her voice sharp. “Alphy, Asgore or Papyrus can fill in for me. It's just one match. I can catch all the rest.”

Alphys shook her head again, feeling miserable. “_N-no_,” she snapped. “Undyne, _no_, are you _kidding me?!_ You've been waiting – _fighting_ – for this, for over two years, and now that you have it, you're going to _waste_ it on _me?!”_

Granted, Alphys's words were slurred and mixed with stammers, sniffles, and coughs, but Undyne still understood, and had opened her mouth to protest.

Instead, Alphys covered it. “No!” she cried, keeping it in place. “I know it's easy to say it's just one stupid baseball match between kids, but it's _not!”_

Her other hand moved to touch Undyne's cheek, and her eye softened.

“I know it's so much more than a stupid game,” Alphys insisted. “Not only is it _your_ game, one you built from _scratch_, all on your own, but it's also _Frisk's_, too! You have to be there, because without you, people will be forced to wonder how serious you – and thus, _we_ – are about this peace!”

Alphys ran out of breath and coughed, pulling her hands back to cover her mouth, but Undyne remained silent, stunned. She looked at Alphys as if she had never seen her before, and perhaps she hadn't – not like this.

After almost two weeks of not wanting to leave Undyne alone or be apart, here Alphys was, insisting she abandon her and not look back.

_Okay, maybe not exactly like that,_ she corrected herself, _but still. She has no clue what she's saying, and yet I also know she really does._

When Alphys was calm, she found Undyne holding _her_ face, instead, and their eyes met.

Undyne stared into Alphys's face, her heart swelling with love from the mere _sight_ of it, and in the best way. She smiled, unaware that she did, simply because, despite her increasing illness, no matter what, her Alphy would be and always was so _adorable_.

“You are so amazing,” Undyne answered in a hushed whisper, as if awed. “How the _hell_ are you with _me_?”

No. There was no _as if._

Alphys's eyes filled with tears, and she covered Undyne's mouth again. “No!” she repeated, her voice breaking. “Stop it! I'm not—this isn't some stupid _noble_ thing—I just want things to work out! We worked _so hard! I want this to work!”_

Alphys suddenly found herself breathless and on her back, and before she could say a word, she felt Undyne beg her, “Make love with me. Now, please?”

And of course, Alphys nodded, her body welcoming Undyne and needing her just as much – if not more.

But in the end, it still changed nothing.

* * *

Despite her jokes (and best efforts), Undyne woke up without any sign of being sick – and Alphys woke with them all, barely able to get out of bed.

Again, Undyne declared she was staying home, but again, Alphys pushed her out the door, and admittedly, once out of it, the excitement reunited with Undyne and reminded her _why_.

Undyne practically flew to the school, making it there an hour early – and even then, she found that the place was crowded, and that a great deal of the crowd was made up of humans.

“Holy _shit_,” she whispered to Papyrus, the second he'd caught up with her. “Is this for real?”

“THERE'S A REPORTER COMING IN AN HOUR,” was Papyrus's answer, making Undyne's question seem even more relevant. “FOR THE _LOCAL_ NEWS. I KNOW IT'S NOT NATIONAL OR INTERNATIONAL TV LIKE EVERYONE EXPECTED, BUT--,”

“Are you _kidding_ me?!” Undyne repeated, but this time in a different way. “This is _awesome!_ Get the kids ready if they're here, and I’ll be there as soon as I'm ready!”

And she bolted, right to the lockers and into the staff change room, where - for almost three weeks now - she'd hung her own coach uniform, one she'd looked at every day since she got it, so happy and excited…

Once it was on, she felt like she was wearing a new set of armour, and she grinned at her reflection.

It faltered a little when she wished Alphys was there, so to help both herself and her wife, she snapped a selfie of herself and sent it to Alphys, with zero context.

Almost immediately, she got back, _“Do NOT come home wearing anything else!”_

And she both laughed and cried, her feelings so mixed up that she had no choice.

But later, she forgot. 

* * *

They lost.

Undyne didn't even care. She went into it knowing it was going to be the outcome, and she continued not to care.

When the final inning ended, and the scoreboard revealed just how thoroughly they'd been pounded by their human opponents, she _still_ didn't care.

She was still so proud, so _happy_. And those feelings were ones that her monster students felt the most, and knew that they should feel the same – and soon did.

When Undyne hugged each one, she meant it with all of her heart, especially whenever she added, “We _were_ awesome!”

Because to her, they _had_ been. They had done it. They had succeeded in completing the game, with no major mishaps, and any minor ones were quickly resolved with quickly applied humour and wit, from both sides.

Undyne had honestly wondered if it would have gone well had her team won, instead, but decided not to dwell on it. They had meant to lose, but that didn't matter. They still got to the end.

And Undyne couldn't of been prouder.

The promised reporter even took a picture of both teams, and when placed together, both seemed to share the same amount of happiness and pride.

It made the humans wonder about monsters more, wondered how such a race could be so cheerful when so cleanly beaten.

In other words, everything that Undyne had hoped for – despite losing – had happened.

She still won.

* * *

Undyne was still so elated, so high on success, that she danced around the change room, slowly undoing each piece of her uniform and hanging it up carefully, admiring it despite the new stains and smells.

She was so happy, so hyper, that she missed it when the door opened – but did not when it closed. She froze, save her ears, which twitched, and she waited a moment, then called, “Yo, occupied. Get lost.”

The last thing she wanted was anyone to walk in on her right now – dancing in her underwear around her uniform like a witch around her hearth – so she used her worst voice, hoping it was just an errant student and would be scared away.

Undyne listened, biting her lip and tiptoeing over to her bag of civvies, just as she heard more footsteps – and saw someone turn around the corner.

It was Lindsey.

Undyne stared at her, freezing in place with shock. She had no clue why _anyone_ would walk in knowing she was here, let alone why it would be _Lindsey_.

“Uh,” Undyne breathed out, her hands reaching into her bag desperately for her shirt – _anything_ to cover up. “Hi…?”

Lindsey nodded, smiling a little. It wasn't unusual; she always smiled whenever around Undyne, but for some reason, it didn't feel the same. She looked away, instead focussing on getting dressed, again; after all, they were both women, so why would a little flesh be a big deal between them?

_Indeed_.

And yet all Lindsey did was… _stand there_, leaning against the doorway, her arms crossed and her eyes sharp.

And she kept smiling. All in silence. Like she was waiting for Undyne to get dressed before saying a word.

Undyne didn't like it, but she said nothing, and kept her own gaze averted, moving to try and hide as much as she could. Her face burned, but not with the usual kind of shy or charmed flattery.

She felt _uncomfortable_, and suddenly all she wanted was to go home. Her victory buzz was long gone.

Finally, when she was fully dressed and pulling her hair back into a ponytail, Undyne finally met Lindsey's gaze – and found it _burning_ _bright_.

Like she'd planned it that way.

Like she'd wanted to see catch Undyne unawares.

_But Lindsey isn't like that with me,_ Undyne reasoned, before she finally managed to speak.

“What's up?”

Lindsey leaned away from the door, standing up tall and letting her hands drop to her sides, her smile widening.

"I just wanted to say congratulations about the match,” she said, at last, her voice smooth, like Undyne had never heard it, before. “You guys did great!”

"Great?” Undyne snorted, but she smiled in spite of herself. “We _lost_, remember? But thanks…” She looked away briefly. “I appreciate it.”

_"Everyone_ knows your kids lost on purpose – so not to embarrass the humans.”

_Damn_.

"That obvious, huh?” Undyne sighed, grabbing her purse and throwing it over her shoulder with a sigh. “Hated doing that, but it's their first game. Therefore, it's the only freebie they're gettin'."

Lindsey watched as Undyne stretched up to pull her coat out of her locker, then close it, before draping it over her arm, looking back to her with what she hoped was a dismissive but polite look.

Instead, Lindsey simply shoved her hands into her pockets, her eyebrows raising. "I bet you'll whip their asses, next time,” she answered.

"Hell yeah, and they won't see it coming," Undyne agreed, flashing a big grin.

"So do you want to go get a drink with me to celebrate, my treat?"

Undyne's smile twitched, and inside, her stomach sank. 

_Is she asking what I think she is? _

"Uh… thanks, Lindsey,” Undyne murmured, “but I should get home. Alphys isn't feeling very well, today, and I've been away too long from her, already. She needs me. I gotta go.”

"Oh, okay,” Lindsey replied, shrugging casually, completely unruffled – as though she didn't get what Undyne was actually saying. “Raincheque, then?"

"Erm,” Undyne mumbled, looking away, before she finally managed to gather up the courage to try and move past her. “Uh, yeah… sure, whatever.”

“I look forward to it,” Lindsey answered cheerfully.

And for some reason, it made Undyne feel like dirt.

* * *

Undyne got home to find Alphys heavily asleep – and still looking rather ill.

Undyne leaned down close and touched her forehead gently, and it was hot and slick with sweat. The second she was touched, Alphys stirred – then started mumbling in her sleep, clearly still caught by the fever and hallucinating.

"No…” she whimpered, even as Undyne reached p to touch her face and calm her down. “No, _please_… get away from my wife!"

“Alphy, wake up, baby,” Undyne called quickly, tapping her cheek lightly. “Wake up, it's just the fever--,”

"Undyne!” Alphys gasped out, reaching out blindly for her. “Please, I-I love you… Please, _please_, don't do this, _don't leave me_…!”

Undyne raised her voice, tapping her cheek again a little firmer. "Alphy! I’m here, I’m right here with you, lovey, wake up!”

"No, Undyne!” Alphys cried. “I'll be good, I'll be _better!_ Please don't leave me, don't… _please_…!"

"Alphys, _wake up!"_ Undyne snapped out, before sitting down on the bed and taking hold of her shoulders, shaking her gently. “Alphys, can you hear me?! Can you _see_ me, Alphys?!”

Alphys jerked, fighting her for a moment, before she gasped awake – only to find Undyne holding her close. She cried out wordlessly, and Undyne pulled her close, just as she flung herself into her arms, bursting into sobs and clinging onto her tight.

"Shh..." Undyne whispered, rocking her slowly and kissing her between every few words. “I'm here, Alphy… it's okay, it's just a dream, okay? I'm right here, with you. And I'm not going anywhere.”

Alphys heard her and buried her face into Undyne's shoulder.

Undyne repeated herself, several times, and soon, Alphys calmed down.

There was a small silence, before Alphys whispered, “I-I'm sorry. It-it's the fever… the nightmares feel so _real_…”

“I know,” Undyne agreed, kissing her to prove it. “It's okay. I'm here. I'm home, now, and I’m gonna nurse you now, and you can't say no, this time.”

Alphys laughed weakly, and with that, Undyne truly felt that things were – and would be – okay.

Especially when she asked her next question.

"How…?” Alphys murmured, raising her head to meet Undyne's gaze. “How did it go?"

"Great, thanks!” Undyne replied happily, glad to have something nice to talk to. “We went in knowing Toriel wouldn't let us win, so we threw it. But it worked, Alphy: the humans have agreed to have matches with us, once every month!"

"That's wonderful!” Alphys cried, her face lighting up and her hands going to hold her wife's now-beaming face. “I'm so proud of you! You're _amazing_, Undyne!”

But then, to Undyne's dismay, her face fell. “I'm so sorry I wasn't there,” Alphys choked out. “I'm so sorry I was stuck here, sick and stupid.”

"Hey, no, Alphy!” Undyne protested, pressing Alphys's hands to her face. “Do you not think I understand? It's okay; you can't help being _sick!”_

Alphys knew she was being honest, but she still felt – and looked – like she had reason to be ashamed.

But that was when Undyne took hold of Alphys's face, and pulled it up to her own. “That's enough,” she said firmly, and Alphys's eyes wavered. “You wanna know what I want you to worry about? _Nothing_.”

Alphys spluttered out a weak laugh, and Undyne smiled, kissing the tip of her nose. “Now, we got all weekend to make you feel better, so let's take advantage of it, shall we?”

And when Alphys caught the mischievous look in Undyne's eye, she felt all of her feverish terror vanish away. She nodded, and when she smiled and saw Undyne's own smile brighten, she already felt better.


	9. Chapter 9

Despite herself, Alphys still found herself watching Lindsey – and closely, especially whenever she was around Undyne – over the next few weeks.

After she recovered from her flu, Alphys returned to school feeling vulnerable, like her time was limited, somehow. From the very second she set foot into her classroom, again, she felt uneasy, and she wondered if she was still sick – only to immediately know better.

Yes, she was still spooked by the nightmares she'd had while sick, especially when they'd bled into waking hallucination and make her believe it was real. She knew it was therefore somewhat natural to feel this way.

But once Undyne dropped her off and Alphys watched her go, she saw Lindsey suddenly appear from around the corner and greet Undyne, before the two disappeared around another corner, chatting the entire time.

And when Alphys saw that, she nearly sat down on one of the students' desks, like she were about to faint. Luckily, she did not, because once she was shocked by the impact of her rear on hard wood, she reminded herself that she still trusted Undyne, and nothing had changed that.

Sadly, what had also not changed was that she did not trust Lindsey.

* * *

Undyne, however, didn't see Lindsey the same way Alphys did.

At first, she'd honestly wondered if Lindsey were some pathetic loser, to have such an interest in someone like herself, but Lindsey managed to word it in a way that finally made sense to Undyne, in a way it never had, before.

“Undyne, don't you see just how many people you inspire? How many _different types of peoples,_ both human _and_ monster?”

When Undyne had frowned, Lindsey sighed. “Undyne, not only did you fight your way to the top, but you did most of it _disabled:_ half-blind and weakened. You persevered, and became the best warrior in the entire Underground, second only to Asgore – and even then, you felled him, too!"

“Okay,” Undyne murmured. “But--,”

“As well as to women, everywhere,” Lindsey broke in quickly. “Women, both human and monster, and people, especially athletes, with disabilities... A warrior, trained from birth to _kill_ all humans…"

Undyne flinched.

Lindsey went on. "And yet, when given the chance, you did not. You threw away your _life's goal_, and all for _peace!"_

“Well, have you met Frisk?” Undyne had laughed, a trace shyly. “They're pretty convincing…”

But those words had stuck with her, and soon, she started to see Lindsey as a peer, then a fellow – and then, just like she'd told Alphys, a friend.

A _lonely_ friend, one who really seemed genuinely admired Undyne for who she was, and yet could still treat her kindly and without too much awkwardness.

Even Papyrus and sans were gradually won over by Lindsey; she was courteous and kind with Papyrus, taking him seriously, as well as clever and punny with sans, winning him over like a puppy with treats.

Only Alphys – and Alphys, alone – was left completely uncharmed.

After the next week or so after their first game, Undyne had finally lost her understanding as to _why_ Alphys still felt that way about Lindsey. Save that one awkward moment in the change room, Lindsey had done nothing to warrant any suspicion, and yet Alphys remained aloof.

It especially grew to upset Undyne when she realised just how much Alphys would have really enjoyed Lindsey's lessons, or contributing to that history with her own shared memories. Even Toriel had expected that from Alphys, knowing very well by now just how deeply Alphys's adoration for humans lay.

But still, after three weeks, Alphys remained cold and closed off, clinging to Undyne's side whenever the three shared space, together, her eyes sharp and dark and almost always on Lindsey's every move.

Then, the movie night happened, and there was no going back.

* * *

At first, it had been casual, something to celebrate the weekend's beginning with, as Lindsey invited almost all of the teachers out for a movie night, together. She wanted to celebrate her first successful month as a teacher.

Most were thrilled – until the movie itself was revealed, and it turned out that a great deal of them, despite being monsters, were... squeamish.

“A… a horror and gore flick?” Toriel said, her had going to her chest, her eyes wide. “As in, blood and guts _on screen?_ Goodness, no, I do _not_ think so!”

Asgore, to everyone's surprise, shuddered and looked away, and that seemed to set the tone for almost everyone else: if the _King_ was strong enough to admit he was a coward in the face of gore, then so were they.

By the time the Friday in question rolled in, only Undyne had shown up in the teacher's lounge, her face bright with excitement and expectation.

Lindsey turned around when she burst in and blinked – before lighting up, herself.

But Undyne looked around a few times, her eye flicking hurriedly, before her smile faded and her eye returned to Lindsey's.

Before Lindsey explained, Undyne sighed and grabbed a phone, and sure enough, there it was.

_“Undyne, I am NOT going to movie night with you! You know how I feel about people melting or being lit on fire and burning alive!! That's the movie's whole selling point!!!”_

Undyne sighed again; she _had_ forgotten that Alphys hated horror, knowing all too well how much of her true life had been _worse_ than any horror flick, but…

_“Alphy, nobody else showed up,”_ Undyne texted back quickly, just as Lindsey moved to look around, as if checking for hiding teachers. _“It's just me and Lindsey.”_

There was a long pause, then, one that had Undyne's heart pounding with fear and dread, especially once Lindsey had stopped her search and was now standing in front of her, waiting to speak.

But then, _“Undyne, I know you've been dying to see this movie, and you would have seen it alone, otherwise. At least this way you can split the cost of the food – or sneak as much food in between you as you can. Don't worry: I trust you, Undyne. Just text me once you're done so I can unlock the door for you. I love you.”_

Undyne felt her throat close up a little, and she smiled. She was so proud of Alphys, so _genuinely_ proud of her; she knew how hard it had probably been to type that, and so calmly, too...

_“I'm proud of you,”_ Undyne quickly typed back, _“and wait up for me. I'll make it worth your while.”_

A pause.

Then,_ “Yes please!!!”_ followed by a winky face blowing out a heart.

Undyne chuckled, holding her phone to her chest for a moment, before concluding the conversation with, _“I love you. Ttyl.”_

Then, she looked up at Lindsey and grinned. “It's just you and me,” she admitted, shrugging. “Guess we're the only gross people.”

Lindsey laughed. “I'm happy to be in such disgusting company, then.”

Undyne laughed in return, and as she pocketed her phone, her heart lifted.

Surely this meant that things were finally looking up, right?

Right?

* * *

Alphys snarled and threw her phone across the room, her voice breaking as her eyes filled with furious tears. The phone bounced onto the floor, but luckily didn't break.

She didn't care, either way. Thanks to using it, she had likely just thrown her own _wife_ into the arms of her worst enemy.

She choked out a sob, then curled up in her reading chair and hid her face in her arms, unable to stop her sobs, now.

She ignored her phone's chimes. She didn't want to read them.

She was too scared to.

And her tears only stopped once she fell asleep, exhausted by them.

* * *

The movie was _incredible_.

Yes, it was true that the bits that Alphys had fearfully mentioned _were_ included within the movie, and its rating reflected that. However, Undyne was the type of person who could see gore and guts and not be bothered by either, instead simply seeing it all as part of the story, no less important than a love scene or an action scene.

It turned out that Lindsey had the exact same perspective, something that clearly surprised Lindsey, herself, but Undyne was thrilled by it. Finally, she had someone she could go to these movies with; she _hated_ going alone, afraid it made her look creepy, like a serial killer in training, getting _ideas_…

But when she saw Lindsey's eyes gleam in the same way she knew her own did, and over the same scenes, Undyne knew she found her horror soulmate at last, and it made her laugh – especially when Lindsey suddenly shrieked, startled out of nowhere by a jump-scare. Undyne saw it coming a mile away, and it was no less hilarious.

Once it ended, the two were so hyped up on the movie's induced adrenaline that both agreed that the evening wasn't over, yet. But when Lindsey suggested a bar, Undyne countered with a coffee shop – _her_ treat – and Lindsey agreed.

It was another bad sign, Undyne knew, one she also knew she shouldn't ignore – but she ignored it, anyway. She couldn't explain it, even to herself, and especially after that shared coffee.

Over Undyne's sweet espresso and Lindsey's ice-brewed coffee, the two chatted further, at first about horror movies (what made a good one _good_; the _proper_ use of jump-scares; how sex should _actually_ be utilised, instead of as cheap wank-appeal; and so on), then about horror _novels_...

Quickly, and after three more espressos, Undyne discovered that she and Lindsey were _very_ alike, indeed. A small part, the cynical part, wondered if it was yet again the sign of an over-hyper fan, but she didn't sense that Lindsey was lying; she seemed _genuine_ in her preferences, and her surprise that Undyne shared them was too real to be fake.

The cynical voice didn't speak, again, and instead, Undyne let her optimism speak above all else. She’d always wanted a friend who was like herself: a warrior _and_ a woman, a geek _and_ a jock. Lindsey was all of those things, and Undyne found herself truly liking her, and as a real friend.

Therefore, one could imagine her desperation over the idea that her own wife disliked her new friend, and a deeper desperation to correct that dislike, as soon as possible.

* * *

That night, Undyne walked in and found Alphys in her chair, but with nothing in her lap and the TV off, her phone on the floor. She had curled under a blanket and, in the cooling night air, had hidden her face beneath it to keep warm.

For a moment, Undyne stood there and looked at her, a smile coming to her lips the closer she got, and she knelt down beside the chair, her heart racing. She reached up and carefully pulled a bit of the blanket down from Alphys's face, so eager to speak to her...

But Alphys jerked away and buried herself deeper, instead, shivering, even in her sleep.

Undyne moved to wake her – then stopped. Instead, she simply picked Alphys up, blankets and all, and carried her to bed, tucking her in and snuggling up beside her. She _had_ wanted to have sex, but it didn't matter; either way, she was always happy to come home to Alphys, no matter the reason or context.

But it did push back Undyne's chance to win Alphys over to Lindsey's side.

Yet another mistake.

* * *

Alphys did eventually catch on, and once she did, she maintained that she still trusted Undyne, she always would, and _nothing_ would change that.

But whenever she was around Undyne and Lindsey, she went silent, clinging onto Undyne and sometimes staring Lindsey right in the eyes, as if to challenge her, right then and there, for Undyne's heart.

Because that was exactly what was happening.

And Alphys could see it as plain as day.

Lindsey _was_ falling for Undyne, and Undyne was either oblivious to it – or hiding it. Undyne acted like she was merely happy to have a friend like Lindsey.

But Alphys knew better.

Whenever those eyes landed on Undyne, Alphys did _not_ see friendly or familial affection. She did _not_ see the calm attention from a peer.

No; every time the three met up, it felt awkward, because only Alphys could see it: Lindsey's infatuation for Undyne was not only _real_, but _growing_, and well beyond _any_ kind of platonic feeling.

But Alphys said nothing.

Even when her heart screamed at her to threaten or snarl, to defend what she felt was rightfully hers, to challenge Lindsey over the right to love Undyne…

She said nothing, swallowing each bitter thought, and each time, she felt herself poisoned more and more.

And she let it happen.

What else could she do?

* * *

By the end of the next week, Lindsey had called in her raincheque, and had requested Undyne out for drinks – and this time, she meant drinks.

Undyne of course accepted, but she also did exactly what Lindsey hadn't expected: she brought Alphys along with her.

At first, only Alphys could tell that Lindsey was pissed, her eyes narrowing and shooting hatred at her whenever Undyne wasn't looking, and the entire time they shared drinks and snacks at Grillby's, together.

To clearly get even, Lindsey began to flirt with Undyne, something that made both Undyne and Alphys turn red – but for different reasons.

As mentioned, Lindsey _was_ a charmer, and always knew the right words to say in order to get the responses she wanted back. Undyne kept trying to laugh it off, to redirect the conversation _away_, but Lindsey would drag it back.

And soon, Alphys was looking away, practically shaking with unspoken fury, her silence muting her.

Pretty soon, it became too much for Undyne, and awkwardly, she scrambled to her feet and escaped to the washroom, pretending that she'd had too much beer (she'd barely finished her first glass).

She threw herself in and locked herself into a stall, then sat down and used the toilet – while also struggling to calm down. Her heart was _racing_, and she couldn't shake the blush from her face.

And she refused to leave that stall until she had.

Alphys, by then, had had to listen to the constant torture, only to have it conclude with Lindsey openly watching Undyne walk away and vanish into the bathroom. She sipped her drink as she did, but her eyes never left Undyne – or, more specifically, her _backside_. Her eyes were dark, hungry… _predatory_….

And Alphys had seen the entire thing.

Lindsey then turned back toward the table – only to find Alphys right in her face, her eyes blazing with rage, her face flush with that anger she was finally allowed to unleash.

"Just what the _hell_ do you think you are doing?" she demanded between her teeth, standing up and holding herself up upon her palms, keeping them pressed to the table. It was the only was she could be taller than Lindsey, and she needed all the help she could get.

"Excuse me?” Lindsey replied calmly, her eyebrows going up as her drink was lowered down.

"Don't play stupid,” Alphys snapped. “I-I know you _fancy_ Undyne! It-It's all over your face!”

"We're just friends,” Lindsey answered, and even Alphys knew she wasn't lying.

"Maybe, but _you_ don't w-want that, do-do you?" Alphys pressed. “You want _m-more_ than friendship! Don't you?!”

"And what about what _Undyne_ wants?” Lindsey muttered calmly, though again, she glared. “Shouldn't _she_ be able to hang out with whomever she _wants_ to? And without her wife becoming hysterical with jealousy?”

_"Of course!”_ Alphys cried, slapping her palms down onto the table. The dinnerware rattled, but she ignored it. “Lindsey, _fuck's sake!_ Back off, and-and stop... stop _perving_ on _my wife!"_

Lindsey stared at her for a moment, slowly sitting back in her chair, before she got up and walked out, right out of the bar, and in complete silence – and just as Undyne left the bathroom to see her go.

Undyne, confused, forgot to look behind her and at Alphys, and instead, she looked ahead, and toward Lindsey. She quickly chased Lindsey outside to check on her, trying to call her back. 

And all while leaving Alphys behind, looking both annoyed – and deeply hurt.

* * *

"Lindsey, wait!” Undyne called, trying to catch up to the other woman, whose legs were somehow longer than her own. “Wait, dammit! What happened? What's wrong?"

"Ask your wife!” Lindsey snapped back.

Undyne almost tripped, but kept following her. "Alphy? Ask her what? Why? What did she say to you? _Slow down!”_

"She doesn't want me to hang out with you, anymore,” Lindsey answered, finally starting to slow down, and long enough for Undyne to catch up to her – and stop her.

"Lindsey, fucking stop!” Undyne cried, grabbing her by the wrist and yanking her back. “Jealous? Alphy is jealous? Why?"

Lindsey paused, then moved her hand down – and grabbed hold of Undyne's hand.

"Because…” Lindsey stammered, her face averted – though her grip was sure. “Because she knows that… that I like you… Okay?”

Undyne stared at her, frozen in mid-step, now, completely thrown by this.

Lindsey took advantage of it and took hold of that hand between her own. “I'm sorry, Undyne, I can't hide it any longer,” she suddenly confessed, her voice softening. “I _like_ you, Undyne. And I know you feel the same way about me, too."

And before Undyne could react at all – she didn't even have time to breathe – Lindsey moved closer, taking hold of Undyne and pulling her close...

And Lindsey kissed her, catching Undyne completely off guard, and her arms flailed up with shock, her hands shaking.

And at that exact moment, Alphys walked outside to find them.

And she did.

Alphys saw _everything_.

As soon as Undyne's brain processed what was happening, she brought her hands up and took hold of Lindsey's face, jerking it away to stare at Lindsey with stunned shock, her mouth open…

…only to see Alphys standing behind her, seeing the expression on her wife's face, before she turned and ran away, leaving both Undyne and Lindsey behind.

It had happened.

It was over.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos to Glavenus for getting this right.
> 
> TW: read the tags.

Alphys hadn't meant to give chase.

Not really.

Not when her mind caught up with her too late, and couldn't stop her in time from stumbling outside after Undyne, her heart in her throat, her mouth open to scream at Lindsey—

\--only to stop, her eyes widening, the second she realised what it _really_ was that she'd walked in on.

Lindsey _was_ kissing Undyne…

And Undyne was reaching up with both hands, her fingers shaking, as though to take hold of her face...

Undyne was clearly just as passionate as Lindsey.

And it was that, and that, alone, that made Alphys turn around blindly, and start running away, as fast as her legs could possibly carry her, from Grillby's.

From that kiss...

From her loss...

She didn't look back, blinded by tears – and she didn't hear anything but the sound of her own breaths, ones torn out of her with every sob, coupled with the sound of her stumbling footsteps upon painful concrete.

She didn't even _feel_ anything, save pain, so much pain, so brutal and consuming, and in so many places, all at once...

And soon, the sound of her heart shattering within her breast was all she could focus on, even as the world blurred past her and she saw nothing, no one...

Just her heart, beating painfully, trying to stay together while already being in pieces...

That, she heard above all else.

* * *

Undyne's stomach became cement, the second she realised what was happening, and she froze, her eye flaring with shock, before she reached up with shaking hands and grabbed hold of Lindsey's face, painfully aware of what Lindsey was doing to her – and how her own body was reacting to it.

And when Lindsey suddenly found her _hair_ grabbed, her face violently yanked away from Undyne's, and the kissing stopped. She went still and silent, her eyes wide and shocked, even in the darkening evening.

Because Undyne wasn't even looking at her.

The second she was free of Lindsey, Undyne shoved the lioness aside and started after Alphys, calling her back.

_"Alphy!_ Alphy, no, it's not what it looks like!” Undyne screamed out, barely able to keep track of her wife's retreating back; she dismayed that she could be outrun so quickly, and by _Alphys_…

But that wasn't why Undyne wasn't already running after Alphys; Lindsey was holding her back, keeping hold of one of her stolen hands between her own, and when Undyne pulled on it, Lindsey held fast, her face both hurt and angry, now.

_“No!”_ Undyne cried helplessly, just as she watched Alphys throw herself onto a bus. _“Alphy--!”_

Her voice broke, and she reached out with her free hand, as if mere inches away from touching her, from reaching her…

"No...!" Undyne pleaded, her vision blurring with panic. _"Alphy, come back!!”_

It was too late: Alphys had boarded, and was out of sight.

Undyne screamed out wordlessly in frustration, tears filling her eyes, and she finally tore her hand away from Lindsey's, shock slapping her across the face and making her back away.

What had just happened began to sink in – including just how upset Alphys was, now, as a result of it.

Furious, Undyne rounded on Lindsey and reached up, shoving her back by the shoulders, and Lindsey stumbled, her face falling further with dismay and shock of her own.

"_Why did you do that?!"_ Undyne snarled at Lindsey, her voice breaking.

When Lindsey hesitated, Undyne reached up and grabbed onto the front of her shirt, about to shake her.

Instead, Lindsey plucked them off and moved back. "I _told_ you,” she snapped back, her own eyes filling with tears, now. She clenched her fists, her eyes fixed on Undyne's. “I have feelings for you, Undyne – _and don't you pretend that you feel nothing in return for me!!”_

Undyne stared at her, shock making her blood turn to ice. "As a _friend_, yes, but I'm _married_, Lindsey!"

Lindsey snorted and rolled her eyes, so Undyne added, “_Happily_ married!"

"Oh?” Lindsey snorted again, her hands now on her hips.

Undyne had to restrain herself from slapping her, especially when she kept talking.

“For how long, Undyne?” Lindsey wondered, her eyes boring into Undyne's, truly wanting an answer that would appease her. “How long will it be, until you realise _I_ can make you happier than _that lying lizard_ ever could?!"

Undyne jumped with shock, especially when, to emphasise it, Lindsey went back in to kiss Undyne, again, even going so far as to take hold of Undyne's hips, to pull on them and bring her closer.

_"Get off of me!”_ Undyne cried, slapping those hands away, her voice now high-pitched with terror.

Her mind had caught up with her actions, and she suddenly realised what had just happened – and what it _really_ meant, now.

_What have I done?!_

She shoved Lindsey away, but that didn't deter the other woman; she simply dove in for another try, just managing to shove her lips up against Undyne's a second time, before Undyne again shoved her back – and rougher.

_“Leave me alone!”_ Undyne shouted, her voice shrill and echoing in the growing dark of evening.

She raised her head and looked around quickly, her ears twitching, before she remembered that Alphys had grabbed a bus, and was now way ahead of her, or any way of guessing where she was headed.

Dread filled Undyne's stomach. “Oh, god… I gotta find her," she rasped out, before she sidestepped another lunge from Lindsey – and instead began to chase that bus.

And Lindsey remained alone, standing in the dimming light, completely silent.

What was done, was done.

* * *

"Alphy!” Undyne shouted into her phone, her voice breaking yet again. "Pick up!!

She’d found the bus route and was sprinting along it, her eye sharply ahead of her and constantly making out the distant red lights of the bus's taillights, using them as beacons.

The entire time, she kept her phone to her ear, hanging up and calling back the second it was necessary, and leaving more messages on her phone until the memory was full.

“Alphys, _pick up, dammit!_ Answer your _fucking_ phone! Please! _Please?!”_

After several more attempts, all she got was an error message, then disconnection.

Now, she knew it was serious.

* * *

Undyne finally made it back home, but Alphys wasn't there, like she'd thought. There was no sign of her: no purse, no coat, not even keys.

"Fuck,” she panted out, before she called out: _“Alphy!_ Are you home? Where did you go?"

A thought answered her quite abruptly, and it horrified her instantly.

"No, oh, _god_, please..." Undyne whispered, frozen by that fear. “Alphy, please, _don't be there_…”

But despite her plea, she darted back out of their apartment, making her way straight for the Underground, anyway.

* * *

Once at the abyss – that double-waterfall platform where Alphys had stood when they'd first met – Undyne searched _everywhere_, even rummaging through and upturning several of the piles of rubbish around the dump.

With each disruption, Undyne shouted for Alphys, screaming for her, begging her to just come out, to just listen… to come home...

But all she heard in reply was herself, in her own pathetic echo.

For a moment, Undyne paused at that edge, her heart sinking as she looked over it. She was very, _very_ worried, now, but she also didn't want to seriously consider that Alphys had done what she was truly dreading: that her wife had jumped over this very edge, and all because of an oversexed fan who'd pretended rapport with Undyne in order to get into her pants…

_No,_ Undyne growled to herself, tearing her gaze away and turning around, to start anew. _I can't think like that._

_ She's somewhere else._

_ She just has to be…_

_But where...?_

Sticking to the Underground for now, Undyne used familiar and well-worn pathways to Alphys's Lab, the ones she'd used and shared during their friendship when she came over to Waterfall for a visit. Already, those days seemed like ancient history, and yet it was mere years ago – not even out of single digits.

Time made no sense.

Undyne then snuck around to the side of the Lab, where Alphys had shown her a hidden entrance, once to be used “in case of emergencies, only” (which Undyne translated to “use for escaping confrontation” once she knew more about her).

Undyne searched for a moment before she found the hidden latch, and she pressed down, opening a hidden hatch door. She went through it, then made sure to lock it behind her.

Just in case.

She quickly searched the Lab, finding both levels empty, and she even went to the security console and checked the many cameras, using them to search, too, but she found no trace of her wife on any of the screens.

She sighed.

_That leaves the True Lab, then._

Using the second hidden switch, this time in Alphys's restroom, Undyne made her way into the True Lab, her heart falling the second the doors opened to cold, stale air.

She shivered, despite having been here many times before. She had never been down there alone, before.

_It's scarier alone,_ she learnt.

She also knew it meant she owed Frisk an apology (she'd called them a wuss for finding the place eerie and unsettling). But she didn't have the luxury to linger on that fear, and instead, she broke into another run, searching every room and corner she could find – until she finally found something.

There, on one of the beds, was a note with Undyne's name on it, and in a beloved, barely-legible hand. She opened it, and found a hastily-written letter, one that made her almost faint – especially when she realised what it meant:

_“Undyne,_   
_I knew this would happen, one day – and not just because of that premonition. I just always knew that, some day, you'd finally realise that you could do better than me – that I was never good enough for you. I never understood why you settled on me, but I was so thrilled to be with you that I refused to question it any longer._   
_Now, I’m questioning. So now, I’m stepping aside._   
_I hope I made you happy during the time we were together, even if I wasn't enough to make you happy for long._   
_I don't want to hold you back any longer._   
_It was selfish of me to think I could marry you, knowing fully well you deserved better than me._   
_Now, I want you to move on, and be with Lindsey, someone who can give you so much more than I ever could._   
_I want you to always know that it's okay, and I understand._   
_Undyne, I forgive you._   
_I understand, and I want you to be happy._   
_I just can't bear to watch you be happy without me, with someone else..._   
_So please, forgive me for this horrible weakness, this ruthless decision I've made._   
_Please understand that I'm doing this because I love you, enough to want to set you free, because I know that's what is best for you, even_ _ if doing so is giving you to someone else as a result._   
_I love you, Undyne. I always will._   
_Love, your Alphy. Xx”_

Undyne was shaking by the end, tears streaming down her face and dripping onto the paper. She dropped the letter and moved down the hall, following both her hearing and her smelling (she finally caught Alphys's scent from the letter), and it led her to the Lab's bathroom.

Without waiting, Undyne opened the bathroom door and rushed in and toward the bathtub, one close with a curtain, and knelt down beside it. All Undyne could see, at first, was a dark, limp shadow behind it, and she let it fool her, just for a moment, that she was mistaken. She refused to raise her hand, to pull the curtain back, to make solid those shadows, until she finally realised what _else_ she was smelling, and knew she had to.

With a sudden cry of fear, Undyne hurriedly yanked it back.

There, curled up in the tub, was Alphys.

Her arm was stretched out ahead of her, her hand curled around the drain, and the sleeve was pulled to above her elbow.

And the inside of her arm was cut open, lying in a growing puddle of blood, one that dripped slowly down the drain.

And Alphys didn't move. She didn't even make a sound. 

_"Alphys, no!"_ Undyne croaked out.

She started moving forward, to pull her wife free – before stopping herself and getting back to her feet; she knew she needed to pause, to breath, to _think_.

She wanted to save Alphys, but she had to do it _right_.

Undyne looked around the tiny room, then threw herself at the sink and cupboard beneath it, opening it and rummaging until she found a few spare face cloths and two towels. She grabbed it all and ran back to the tub, climbing right into it, before she reached around Alphys – and her blood – and moved to wrap the first towel thickly around that cut on her wrist, pressing down on it tight. Then, her other hand trembling, she pulled her phone free from her back pocket and shakily dialled the emergency line – it took _three_ fumbling attempts – and called for an ambulance, and why.

The operator on the phone was kind, but Undyne didn't hear anything. She was crouched around Alphys, unable to see her face too well (she'd hidden it behind her other arm, one crooked around her face, and pressed it into the floor), and she made sure the towel remained in place, desperate to stop the bleeding until help arrived. Focussing on that took all of her attention, so as soon as the operator confirmed that help was coming, she went deaf.

By then, Undyne was in shock, trying her best to hold it all together but knowing it was impossible feeling like this. All she wanted to do was drop the phone, pick Alphys up, and go home and to their bed, to pretend this entire thing was a nightmare, and wasn't happening, so they could wake up and be happy, again...

But when the operator suddenly _shouted_ at her _not_ to move Alphys – or else Alphys would "bleed out and die, so _stop!"_ – Undyne froze, _that_ scaring her more than her yearning to pretend all was well.

She settled to her knees and hunched over Alphys, hugging onto and over her like she were her wife's blanket, and this way, she could finally see what Alphys's face looked like.

Only to wish she hadn't.

Alphys didn't react or respond to anything Undyne was doing to or with her, and this time was no exception. It wasn't hard to see why, even in dim light: she'd already lost a _lot_ of blood, and her face was already deathly pale – and nearing grey.

When Undyne reached up and gently pulled one eyelid up, she saw that Alphys's eyes were greying out, too.

Alphys was dying.

And all Undyne could do was hold her and sob, plead and beg her to come back, wake up, say something, _anything_… so long as it meant the end of _this nightmare..._

"Please, don't die,” Undyne was begging her, _“Alphy, oh, god, please, don't die! Don't let her die!” _

She choked on her words, moving closer to touch Alphys's greying cheek, and again, there was no reaction.

_“No!”_ Undyne spat out stubbornly, even as she cried. “No, Alphy, I _can't_ lose you, _do you hear me?!”_

By the end, she was shouting, desperate for a reaction.

“Hey! Alphy, _you can't leave me!_ Don't you _dare_ leave me!”

But still, all Alphys did was lie there, her eyes closed and already sunken in, and Undyne broke down, at last. She held Alphys as best as she could through the wait, gently rocking the two of them together, even as she worked to prise the now-red towel off, to throw it aside and replace it with the last one...

And after that, the rest was a series of blurry memories.

She remembered thinking, _Please hold on, please hold on, please hold on…_

She remembered fighting, with someone she didn't know, who was pulling on her, but if she moved away, then no one would be compressing Alphys’s wrist, and she would die…

She remembered being pulled to her feet once finally out of the tub, of being pushed back when she tried to fight her way back in…

She remembered them taking the towel away, and her protesting with dismay, because now Alphys would die for sure…

Tubes, bags of liquid, bags of blood.

Needles, syringes, tubes, catheters...

A breathing mask, a blood pressure armband, a pulse-tracker...

She then remembered being in the ambulance, suddenly and completely alert as if slapped, and she blinked hard, unable to see clearly until her eye found Alphys.

Again, it was a struggle not to surrender back into the fog of shock, seeing her wife lying motionless like that, but Undyne fought it back, and then, she could finally _see_.

And what she saw made her weep.

Alphys was lying in a stretcher, hooked up to blood and oxygen, the mask covering most of her face and making her look way too ill and small.

Undyne now noticed that there were three other monsters with her: the driver and the two medics, who flanked Alphys near her head, so that Undyne was forced to sit at Alphys's feet.

She didn't care. She watched in empty silence as Alphys laid before her, her wrist now heavily bandaged and draped over her stomach, her face completely grey and spreading down her neck and shoulders as her wife watched in silent horror…

But Undyne didn't leave her.

Even when they made it to the hospital, a small clinic they _called_ a hospital because it was the only one meant for monsters, Undyne remained stuck to Alphys's side, refusing to leave her.

The entire time.


	11. Chapter 11

Undyne was terrified, waiting alone in the small chapel in the corner of the clinic, where the Delta Rune was painted in full display, surrounded by three rows of candles; some were lit, but most were not.

Undyne had lit one, and was standing over it, now, feeling the heat of the small flame making the skin on her hands tingle, but she ignored it, refusing to pull them away from the flames. She stared into the one she'd kindled, her vision blurring, prisming, then clearly, before repeating, over and over, as she wept.

She didn't pray. She wasn't religious. Most monsters weren't, instead more prone to keen optimism and eager anticipation, refusing to give into the dark humour of the helpless as much as she probably could – or should.

But all the same, over and over, she repeated, _Please save her, please save her, please save my wife, please save my Alphy, I'll do anything, I didn't want this…_

_Please save her…_

Right now, she was alone, her entire body on edge and reacting to the slightest of sounds, waiting only for the sounds of the chapel's door opening, of Alphys's doctor, coming to get her…

It had taken four long and excruciating hours before Alphys was stable; that horrible grey that had spread to her fingers was apparently finally gone, replaced by pale but normal-coloured flesh. She was in post-op, and Undyne was waiting to see her, once she was stable enough to.

It had been close, they'd said to her, once the doctor was able to update Undyne the first time.

Covered in Alphys's blood, Undyne had paced and paced before the doors they'd barred her from, doors she'd screamed at to go through, not wanting to leave Alphys behind… not wanting to be left behind...

But those doors did open eventually, and the doctor came out and sat down, then said, “Captain, she's alive. And only thanks to you.”

Undyne had simply stared at them. Her hands felt itchy, the blood on them drying and flaking off, and her clothes felt heavy and gross, but she honestly didn't really feel it, beyond a second of notice.

The doctor gestured to her to sit, and she did in silence, her lips trembling.

“Captain, she's alive,” they'd repeated, and Undyne struggled to accept that. “But thanks to you. If you hadn't found her when you did, if you hadn't used those towels, she would be dust, and long before she got under my hands. _You_ saved her life more than _I_ did.”

All Undyne could do was stare. “It's my fault,” she croaked out. “I drove her to it.”

The doctor blinked, then looked up and waved a nurse over. When their eyes met, again, the doctor's concern had been clear.

“Captain, this isn't anyone's fault. She's safe, and now you can relax. You can get food, change your clothes, or go home and sleep for a bit, until we call you back, once she wakes--,”

“No, I’m not leaving,” Undyne had snapped, about to stand up to prove it, but the doctor's nods stopped her. “Fine, sure, I'll get changed, yeah…” She added that hastily, when she saw the look on the nurse's face at the sight of her clothes. “But I need to be here when she wakes up. She can't be alone, not anymore, she needs me, and I need to show her that--,”

“Okay,” the doctor broke in softly, stopping Undyne's babbling. “This is Eunice, and she's going to get you set up with a shower and some fresh scrubs, while we clean your clothes, okay?"

And Undyne had stared. “You can do that?”

They both nodded, so she agreed.

Eunice led Undyne to a staff locker, then made sure it was empty before grabbing Undyne some oversized maroon scrubs, a zip-up hoodie, and tiny toiletries. She showed Undyne how the shower worked, then took her bag of bloodied outerclothes and left.

At first, Undyne showered while still wearing her underwear, needing to at least rinse them off, first – before she'd noticed the giftshop set of underwear tucked in with the scrubs. She peeled the sullied set off and tossed them aside (later bagging them in plastic and shoving them in her purse), then showered the rest of herself off, desperate, now.

She'd watched the blood swirl around the drain, and her body shuddered, before she suddenly felt herself get sick, then start heaving. She hunched over, shoving her hair back quickly, then threw up, feeling what she thought was the last of her adrenaline leave her. She dropped onto the floor and threw up every bit of food left within her, and couldn't stop until she was empty, sobbing, wishing she could go back...

_Blood. Alphys's blood. Dripping down the drain. Not at all where it belonged…_

When she managed to stop, she was cold and sweaty, the water lukewarm. There was no trace of blood or vomit by the time she came back to her body, and she trembled, pushing herself back up to her feet to wash up properly, something she did automatically, as if in a trance.

By the time she'd dressed in the scrubs and combing her hair back, she was exhausted. All she wanted was to go home, curl up with Alphys in their own bed, and just fall asleep, so that when she woke up next, this would all just be a memory, and of a bad, bad dream, not reality...

But when she'd raised her head and looked at her reflection, her face looked back, and she knew: this _was_ real. This was _too_ real.

And she wished it wasn't.

Now, she stared into the flame until she saw nothing else, and simply waited.

By the time she was about to leave and return to the waiting area, Eunice was just outside the door waiting for her.

Undyne stopped, her heart skipping with fear, until she forced herself to actually understand the expression on the nurse's face: calm urgency.

“There you are!” she said, and Undyne went up to her in silence, nodding. “Come with me.”

She was too tired, too scared to protest or ask why, so she just nodded again, following Eunice in complete silence, her eye still seeing the negative of that flame upon its cornea.

They walked down a dark, dim hallway, flanked with rooms full of people, sick and dying monsters, most sleeping or unconscious. The sounds of weeping, of dismay, mixed with life-support and machinery, were all Undyne could hear, and she was terrified of what she was being led to.

But when Eunice opened a door and gestured for her to go in, Undyne obeyed, her entire body starting to refill with adrenaline from a source she never even knew she had.

Once she was inside, the door closed, and she was alone.

Only, no: she wasn't alone. There _was_ someone in the room, a patient, and Undyne moved toward them, where they laid in a cot behind a privacy curtain.

Undyne watched her hand rise up and take hold of the edge of the curtain, then slowly pull it back, as if watching someone else.

Alphys laid there, lit up dimly by a sole lamp overhead the bed. She hadn't reacted to any sounds that Undyne made, and it was obvious why: she was still gone, still far away, and even though Undyne now stood beside her body, she had no clue where Alphys's mind was – or if it would come back.

The doctor said it would, that she'd suffered no brain-damage thanks to Undyne, but now, she wasn't so sure.

Alphys _was_ hooked up to tubes and machines, just like Undyne had seen on the way, except at least Alphys looked _alive_. Her right hand rested upon her stomach, one fitted with an IV port, and from it she received blood and clear liquid, from bags hanging beside her on a long pole with wheels.

Undyne stared at the blood for a moment, her stomach curdling, before her eye moved back to Alphys's face.

She was still pale, even in this light, but her complexion was one of someone living and improving, not dying and near death. She breathed slowly and softly; a transparent tube circled around her head and hooked into her nostrils, and Undyne followed it to an oxygen tank. It didn't breathe for her, however; she did that on her own. It puffed out controlled doses for her to breathe in, herself.

“Alphy?” Undyne suddenly whispered, and even her whisper sounded much too loud.

Alphys didn't react, like she'd hoped.

Undyne then sat down, her legs giving out and her rear luckily finding a chair on its own, and she pulled herself closer to her wife's bedside, her entire body aching with grief.

At this side, lying flat beside her, was Alphys's left hand – the arm thickly bandaged, the bandages clean and fresh.

Undyne stared at that hand, watching her own reach out to take it into her own, and found it freezing cold. She bit her lip and to it into both of her hands, one trying to rub warmth into it, the other holding it tight. She felt Alphys's wedding ring bite into her hand, and she went still.

The ring was stained, sticky with dried blood that was missed by the staff, but she still wore it. It still remained on her hand, like it always had since Undyne had placed it there.

Even dying, thinking she'd been betrayed, certain she'd lost her wife forever, still Alphys had kept wearing that ring, even as it, too, grew heavy with her own blood.

Undyne wore its twin around her neck – Alphys's was silver, while Undyne's was gold – as she used her hands way more roughly and didn't want to damage it, ever. She valued that ring, not because of its price or how pretty it was, but what it represented. During any special occasion, she made the exception and wore it on her hand, and Alphys always noticed and lit up, making Undyne pleased she did.

It was a simple piece, made of solid gold or silver, and shaped into the symbol of infinity, an eight on its side, but its meaning was anything but simple. They'd chosen it both for simplicity as well as depth, and to make it clear how serious they were for each other…

_How could I have been so blind, so stupid?_

Her eyes filled with tears, and she lowered her head, starting to weep softly, pulling that hand up to her own face and pressing her cheek against it, careful of the bandages. She shut her eye tight, listening to the machines and trying to accept their meanings.

But it didn't matter. It was all far too late.

_She'd warned me,_ Undyne thought. _She'd warned me over and over, every time that dream came back and she saw who she saw, and I ignored her, anyway._

_I couldn't see past my own vanity, my own superiority complex, thinking that even if it did come true, I wouldn't be so stupid as to let it get that far…_

_Never once did I think I wouldn't have a choice or say in it. _

_Never once did I think I would lack control over something so intimate._

But she had. She hadn't been prepared. She hadn't even known it could happen to her. It never had, before_._

_And she still saw it,_ Undyne thought in dismay, shame making her wish she could puke, again. _She saw it all, and misunderstood, and tried to kill herself because she couldn't bear it…_

_But…_

Undyne inhaled shakily, trying to slow her breaths. She knew, truly, that she wasn't truly to blame for this. She hadn't asked Lindsey to kiss her, hadn't even led her on to do so. She'd always made it clear that her heart was Alphys's, and had been certain that Lindsey had known that, too.

But clearly, she hasn’t known it at all.

Instead of getting mad, of getting angry, of demanding answers, Alphys had taken all that she'd seen at face value and concluded that it meant the worst.

And at her worst, there was nothing worth living for, anymore.

_We've been together for three fucking years,_ Undyne realised, _and friends for longer! And yet she didn't even wait, didn't let me speak! She just… accepted it!_

_What will it take to get her to see the truth? That she's my equal at worst, and I never want to leave her? _

_What do I gotta do to prove it to her?!_

_Then she went to go die, all alone, and leaving her last words behind, declaring that she finally accepted that she's worthless to everyone…_

But the dreams hadn't helped. Clearly, the universe had been desperate to spare Alphys this, and kept warning her over and over to stop it before it happened.

Undyne understood how powerful premonition was, and how leaving it ignored could cause the mind to fray.

Clearly, alongside Alphys's insistence that Undyne deserved better than her, and would step aside to do what she thought would ensure Undyne's happiness, the premonition – and Lindsey's actions alongside it – had blinded Alphys to the truth, as well.

_But suicide?_

Undyne hadn't seen that coming. She knew Alphys had depression and anxiety, trauma and PTSD, but save occasional self-injury and self-abusive language, she'd never really seemed _suicidal_.

_And yet, _Undyne knew,_ if I’d been in her exact situation, and she’d kept shrugging me off, I dunno what I would have done…_

_Hell, I would have beat the shit out of Lindsey for that change room stunt…_

_I didn't even see Lindsay’s true feelings, that's how stupid I've been. I thought she'd fucked off after that bullshit in the change room, and let that false sense of relief cloud everything else._

Looking back on it now, Undyne saw how blatantly obvious Lindsey's affections had been. And yet clearly, only Alphys had noticed, and everyone else was just as charmed as she.

“Oh, Alphy,” Undyne whispered weakly, her voice breaking several times. “I'm so, so sorry…”

But Alphys didn't answer. She didn't even react.

And it hurt.

Undyne cried, resting her head upon the side of the bed and beside Alphys's still-cold hand, seeing nothing but blood.


	12. Chapter 12

Undyne didn't know that she’d cried herself out until she started awake from it, as if slapped. She blinked, then raised her head, wondering what had clearly startled her into waking.

Until it happened again, that was: the feel of Alphys's fingers twitching within her own.

Undyne's eye flared and she looked up, and to her joy, Alphys's eyelids were fluttering, and alongside a soft, surprised moan. Her eyes flickered opened once before shutting tight, and she flinched away from the light, even it far too bright.

“Alphy?” Undyne breathed out, before she sat up and cried out: Alphys had turned her head toward her voice and squeezed her hand. _“Alphy!_ You're awake?!”

Alphys blinked hard, then managed to keep her eyes open, just a tiny bit. She barely had time to figure out what she was seeing before she felt herself embraced, and hard. She coughed a little and winced, the gesture jarring her arm, but the second she understood what it was, she whimpered without control and reached out, before burying her face into a familiar shoulder, one she desperately needed…

“Oh, god…” Undyne breathed out, burying her own face into the top of Alphys's and closing her eye tight, rocking them both slowly without realising it. _“Alphy,_ you're okay… you're awake… oh, _thank you_…”

For a blissful moment, Alphys was confused. She managed to blink her eyes open again, finding that with practise, it became easier, and frowned, still trying to make sense of where she was.

“U-Undyne,” she rasped out, her mouth dry and tasting like gross. “Wh-where… what…? Where am I…? Why are you here…?”

Undyne went rigid in her arms, and Alphys blinked harder, her mind starting to lose hold on the curtains it kept trying to keep over her eyes.

Slowly, even as she felt Undyne start to cry in response, Alphys's own mind was consumed with memory, and she had her answer before Undyne could even remember how to word it.

* * *

Alphys had run, blindly, with pain in her chest, and turned in the exact opposite direction from where she'd begun, and all without even knowing where she was even planning on going, or even _how_.

When her eyes suddenly sharpened through a slow fog of shock, she realised she was sprinting toward a bus, one that had seen her and clearly thought her merely a truant regular. It stopped, and she leapt on, her hand full of coins that she didn't remember taking out. She overpaid the driver, thanked them, then hurriedly ran to the back, where no one else was.

She then burst into tears, covering her face and pleading with the universe to just let her have this moment to herself, without any recognition, so that she could lick her wounds in peace. And, probably to make for how much it had already been fucking with her, lately, the bus remained empty until she reached her stop.

And she threw herself out of the bus, not even sure of where she was – until her eyes focused, again, and she saw it: the entrance to the Underground.

Inside, Alphys felt her heart's remains die, and she knew what she had to do, and why her body had brought her here, long before her mind had caught up.

_I can't die at home,_ she thought suddenly, _because that's too cruel to Undyne. She loves that place._

Then, she backtracked. _I'm dying?_

_Yes,_ she agreed. _You're dying. You've overstayed your welcome._

_I have?_

_If Undyne can't even love you,_ that cold voice reasoned, _then there's no reason to live, is there? _

_All this time, you know you've lived for her, because you don't know how to live for someone you hate – including yourself._

_Oh…_

It made complete sense to her. She saw it as logical, as perfectly rational, and it calmed her down, long enough to know what she needed to do, how, and where.

So she went. And found herself back in the bowels of the True Lab.

From there, like Undyne, things became fragments, blurry and feverish and unreal – and also too real.

She'd found herself in the room full of beds, before she reached into her coat for her usual pad of paper and pen, grabbing both. Then, she sat down on one, ignoring the slight cloud of dust that puffed up, and began to write...

She didn't remember what she wrote. Just that it was true and real and had to be done. She knew she couldn't just leave the world without explanation, despite her time in it being over...

Then, she watched her feet move, watched her hand open the bathroom door, absently listening for the usual spoon amalgamate to appear and pester her...

It didn't, so nothing stopped or slowed her down. She went unimpeded as she squatted in front of the sink cupboard, opening it and finding a spare claw file, before taking it and closing the cupboard...

_It's clean_, she remembered thinking. _If I die in a bathroom, and if someone somehow does find me here, all they'll find is dust and blood, and that will be easy to wash away._

_It's a clean way to die._

After that, she remembered nothing.

She didn't remember walking into the tub, closing the curtain, and sitting down in it, playing idly with the file, before digging it into her arm...

She didn't recall how painful it had been, and yet how horrifically satisfying it was, to watch the blood well up, then spill over…

_Darkness. _

_Cold. _

_No sounds, no smells. _

_Emptiness._

_Relief._

Then, slowly, as if her mind was being slow-dripped back into her skull, she began to feel, again. She smelt fresh oxygen, felt the sting of an IV, felt her arm throbbing in time to the tinny sound of her heartbeat, one monitored at her side…

Then, the feel of warmth beside her, holding her hand tight, and then…

* * *

_Undyne_.

“You…” she was saying now, into Alphys's neck, which she could feel was wet with tears. _“You… you tried to kill yourself!”_

Her voice cracked, and she held onto Alphys tighter. _“Why did you do that?!_ Why? Don’t _ever_ do it again, do you hear me? _Do you, Alphys?!”_

Alphys was stunned into silence, her brain screeching to a halt and giving her no words to say to this.

When it had gone on too long, Undyne started to pull back, to raise her head and look into Alphys's face, and she knew she was going to be asked again – and still had no answers to give...

The universe gave her another break, as just at that moment, both Eunice the nurse and her doctor walked in, stopping all conversation between them – especially when the doctor stopped and gaped at them for a moment, clearly surprised by the sight.

“You're awake?!” the doctor cried, smiling for the first time since Undyne had met them.

They and Eunice rushed forward, as clearly, despite the late hour – Undyne only knew that it was still dark out – that they'd stayed to see it through.

That meant a lot.

Alphys, however, blinked hard. She started, then she looked guilty. She opened her mouth, then closed it, instead.

The doctor went to her side, and Eunice when to Undyne, looking happy.

The doctor leaned down and examined Alphys, asking her a great deal of questions, including ones she answered sarcastically, like her name and address.

In any other context, it would have made Undyne laugh. She would've at least smiled. But when she saw that relief in the doctor's face, especially when Alphys began to snark, she instead felt cold, and realised what it meant.

_They hadn't expected it,_ she thought, her hands holding onto her own knees tightly, now, sitting to the side and shaking with emotion, even as she watched in silence.

_They hadn't expected Alphy to wake up._

_They're just as surprised as Alphy is._

And that was the worst hurt of all: that Alphys was surprised that she was still alive.

“You're lucky to be alive, Doctor,” was what Undyne heard next, confirming her fears and making her want to slap someone. “If I may be blunt--,”

_“No,”_ Undyne snapped, but they didn't hear her.

“—we honestly weren't sure you would make it through the night. It was that close a call.”

Undyne flinched, lowering her head and closing her eye, even as she felt Alphys look at her; she couldn't bear to see her wife's expression at that, didn't want to know what she would find within it: relief, or despair.

“It was?” Alphys answered, instead. She watched Eunice reach up and exchange a bag on her IV, and when she saw what it was, her stomach lurched: it was blood, a fresh bag of it.

It started to drip right away, and Alphys couldn’t stop watching it.

“Yes,” she heard the doctor reply. “You are very, _very_ lucky that your wife found you when she did.”

A chill swept through the room, and Alphys flinched.

There it was: full confirmation of what Alphys had done, as gently-said as possible, but no less painful for any of them.

Alphys's eyes left the drip and went back to Undyne, just as Undyne raised her head. She looked so scared, so weary, her eye filling with tears the second Alphys's met it, and she could see how traumatised she was, how badly this had hurt her, and how huge a toll it had taken out of her.

Alphys felt fresh guilt sweep through her. She hadn't wanted to put Undyne through that, which was why she’d hidden so deeply in the first place. She’d only written the note after realising that she might be looked for _eventually_, and wanted to explain the stains she'd likely of left behind.

And least of all had she thought _Undyne_ would be the one to find her....

“I…” Alphys whispered, before she choked on her own dry throat and coughed, then went into a fit, losing breath and thought and wishing she could pass out from all of it…

But the doctor and Eunice took good care of her, and had her settled down and calmed before she could even attempt it. They'd not only given her something to drink, but had managed to sedate her while she was distracted by it, so that once she was done drinking, she could barely hold the cup up, herself.

That was the cue for Alphys to sleep, and again, Undyne was advised to leave.

“No,” Undyne pleaded, her eye bright with fear. She didn't want to risk leaving Alphys alone, again, sedated or not. “Please… let me stay. I'll sleep when she does. I promise.”

Alphys stared up at her, a rekindled warmth spreading through her when she heard this – and when the doctor allowed it, she smiled, that warmth spreading, especially when Undyne smiled back.

Once they were alone, again, Alphys was almost asleep despite herself. She knew she had to explain her actions, but she was also a coward; she didn't want to talk about it at all…

But then she felt Undyne grab hold of her and pull her against herself, and Alphys woke up; Undyne held her tightly, almost painfully so. She broke down, the second she felt Alphys hug back, and started crying, unable to stop, unable to let Alphys go…

She'd been so close to losing her, closer than she'd ever could have _imagined_.

_Her own damned doctor had been shocked by this recovery; that was how close it had come…_

_“Alphy…”_ she sobbed, almost incoherently.

Alphys held her close, reaching up to pet her hair, sliding her claws through the still-damp ponytail slowly. Her fingers shook, but even when her arm grew tired, she didn't stop. She would when Undyne did.

It honestly shocked Alphys, and it was that shock that kept her awake and alert. She hadn't expected to be saved, hadn't expected to be _found_, but above all, she hadn't expected to be grieved over.

Undyne's grief was so heavy, so immense, that Alphys couldn't even properly fathom it, least of all now. She misunderstood it, saw it as a sign of something far worse, and she suddenly knew what she had to do to make it stop.

It was the only thing she could think of, and that was perhaps the saddest thing of all, above all else.

“Undyne,” Alphys whispered softly into her ear, feeling it twitch against her lips from her breath.

Undyne took a breath, held it to listen – only to wish she hadn't.

“Undyne, I'm so sorry that I did this to you,” Alphys whispered, feeling Undyne's hands grip onto her back harder. “I'm so sorry I h-hurt you. I... I _c-can't_… I-I k-keep h-hurting you l-like this…”

Undyne opened her mouth to interrupt, to stop her, to defend herself, but she was too late.

“S-so… the only solution is… th-that… I'll… I w-want… I-_I c-can't take this, anymore…!"_ Alphys keened out, her voice breaking, before she shut her eyes tight and turned her face away.

“I-I want… a d-divorce.”

Undyne went still in her arms, as if still holding her breath. Indeed, she wondered if she would – _could_ – ever breathe, again, after hearing such a thing come from her own wife.

But when Alphys started to cry, too, her tears the kind one makes when their life is truly over and they know it, Undyne knew that she _hadn't_ misheard her.

Undyne raised her head. _“What?!”_ she shouted, sitting up and moving her hands to Alphys's upper arms, holding them both tightly, so that she wouldn't be able to run away, this time, forgetting how impossible that was to begin with... “You want a _what?!_ Alphy, _are you serious?!”_

Alphys didn't open her eyes, didn't move her head back. “Yes,” she agreed weakly. “I can't bear to m-make you so miserable any-any longer… y-you _don't deserve_ th-this, _any_ of this…”

Undyne's eyes filled with furious tears, this time. “And so _these_ are your solutions?! _Divorcing_ me? _Killing yourself?!”_

Alphys flinched at that, especially when Undyne's voice broke.

“You really think _any_ of that shit is gonna make me _happy?!”_ Undyne continued, wishing Alphys would at least look at her._ “What on earth and below has gotten into you, Alphys?!”_

"I-I want to-to... to _free you,_ from being stuck with me,” Alphys whispered. “You deserve better, Undyne, better than me, and always have--,"

“No!” Undyne snapped out, her grip on Alphys's arms tightening. _"Shut the fuck up,_ Alphy, shut up, right now, and just--!”

Alphys sighed. "Undyne--,” she tried.

_"No!_ Shut up and _fucking listen to me!”_ Undyne screamed out, her temper snapping at last.

Alphys went very still, and for a moment so did Undyne, afraid that she'd gone too far.

But then, slowly, Alphys turned her head, and when she opened her eyes, they met Undyne's.

Undyne took this as what it was and continued. “What is it going to take to _get_ _this_ _through_ _to you?"_ she wondered. "That I love _you_; I live with _you_; share a home with _you_; share a bed with _you_; married _you_…!!"

Alphys was breathing quickly, weeping as silently as she could through this, but she didn't interrupt – and she didn't look away.

Undyne softened her voice a little. “Alphy, don't you get it, yet? That you are the only one I _ever_ wanna be with?"

"But…” Alphys blurted out suddenly, unable to keep it in. “But _why?_ You can do so much better! We know that for certain, now!!"

"And what _is_ better, Alphy?” Undyne demanded. “C'mon, tell me: who do you think is so much better than you, than what I _have_ with you?"

_"I'm_ a mess Undyne,” Alphys answered, closing her eyes at last and lowering her head, ashamed completely, now. “I'm a-a fat, depressed l-loser, one who is only dr-dragging you down. You have a-a chance, now, to be with someone b-better… and I want that for you, too..."

Undyne stared at her, hurt beyond all measure, now. "You _want_ me to leave you?!" she cried, her own voice a whisper, now.

_"I_ want…” Alphys began, before she cut herself off and covered her face with her hands. “I-I w-want… you-you… t-to be _happy_, Undyne…”

Now Undyne was starting to get it. She didn't like it, but at least she got it.

"Can't I decide for _myself_ what makes me happy?” she wondered, making Alphys blush a little_. “You_ do, Alphy. You always have, and I wouldn't be happy with anyone else but you, and regardless of what you saw."

Alphys raised her head, then, her eyes full of tears but also bright with anger. “Oh? Then why _are_ you kissing other-other women? And w-with passion like _that?!”_

Finally, she had gotten it out, and it felt good.

It also felt very bad, because it made Undyne's expression fall, and her hands moved away, instead going into her own lap and tangling together within it.

Alphys opened her mouth, about to apologise, but Undyne was already going on.

“That wasn't what you think, Alphy," she answered calmly, though her voice did waver. "I don't care who else there is, because there is only _one you_, and I'm so lucky to have you. So please, Alphy, _please_…”

And here, Alphys felt her own hands taken back by Undyne, only she held them gently, and with a softness that made Alphys tear up – and look up.

Undyne stared back at her, her expression broken and pained, memory and reality warring within her, and for a moment, she feared this wasn't real.

But then, she felt Alphys squeeze her hands, and her mind snapped back, the feeling too incredible to be made up. It made her brave, and she finally found the rest of her words.

“Please, don't ever do _this_, again,” she pleaded. “Don't leave me, Alphy… _please_… especially over something I didn't even _want_…”

Alphys blinked, looking up at her, but Undyne was burying her face into one of her palms, and she bit her lip.

_“Please_, Alphy,” she repeated, knowing she would until she got the answer she needed. “Please… _please don't leave me_…”

"Undyne,” Alphys broke in, and she went quiet, to listen. “I… I won't ever leave you,” she said, and when she did, she knew she meant it. “I'll _never_ leave you, least of all like _this_, ever again.”

"Promise me, Alphy.”

"I promise...” she agreed, her voice soft but also sure. “I _promise_ you, Undyne. I promise… I... I prom... I... Undyne..."

Undyne looked up, then, and saw that Alphys was struggling to stay awake, to make sure that Undyne knew before she surrendered, and it was difficult.

"Thank you, Alphy,” Undyne whispered, smiling for real – and at last. "Thank you, Alphy… thank you so much…”

Alphys smiled back, her eyes lighting up for a moment, especially when Undyne moved to take hold of her, again – and she hugged on, happy to be in her arms.

They held each other for quite some time, long enough for Alphys to nod off in Undyne's arms – with Undyne close behind her – before a nurse interrupted to check Alphys's vitals.

Luckily, they could do it as she slept, and once it was over, the nurse promised them privacy every two hours, unless they called. Undyne agreed.

Once they were alone a final time, Undyne pulled up the fold-out chair, curled up in it, then leaned over and snuggled up as close to Alphys as both her chair and Alphys's cot would allow. Alphys slept through quite a bit of fussing, but soon, once she was certain that Alphys wouldn't disappear, Undyne fell asleep beside her.

Alphys didn't wake for the rest of the night, and Undyne was glad of it..


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the one scene that wasn't planned. But it popped up, and I don't regret it.

That first night, Undyne forgot everything and everyone else. She could only focus on Alphys, waking every time she moved or made a sleepy sound, or especially when a nurse came in for rounds or to change Alphys's meds.

Alphys slept through it all, but Undyne did not. She slept fitfully, had no dreams or nightmares, but couldn't stay asleep.

Therefore, it was with surprise that she found herself being gently woken up with a hand to her shoulder, startling her. She blinked hard, finding Alphys's doctor there.

“Captain?” they said softly, smiling. “It's morning.”

Undyne stared at them. She didn't even feel hungry, yet knew she was. She swallowed, and knew she needed water – and perhaps coffee – before she could even try to think beyond much more, her brain fuzzy and her skin itchy.

“Captain, would you like me to call someone for you?” the doctor added, their face now concerned. “You seem like you could use a break.”

“Someone...?" Undyne echoed, before her eye flared and she jerked away, diving for her purse and digging into it for her phone, grabbing it up with shaky hands and turning it on. It complained that it needed a charge, but lasted long enough for her to see it: she had a lot of missed called, messages, and emails.

Her stomach sank and she bit her lip. What could she even say? How could she try to explain any of it?

‘I'm in the hospital because Alphy almost died, because Lindsey kissed me, because she's in love with me, and I might have been attracted to her, until she forced kisses on me?’

Even in her mind, it sounded insane.

And yet it was true.

“I…” she started, her expression falling, before she inhaled, turned the phone off, and went back to her purse to look for her spare charger. “I-I… I don't think anyone should know…”

“Captain,” the doctor broke in gently. “They _must_ know. And it's better if it comes from you than anyone else. If your family is already worried, then you're already too late. She's going to be here for another three days, so you need help."

Undyne lowered her head, just as she found her charger, but she nodded. “Yeah,” she agreed. “Just lemme charge this… get some coffee…”

“I'll ask someone to get you a take-out breakfast, my treat,” the doctor replied. “Doctor Alphys gets one for free, anyway.”

Undyne wanted to smile, wanted to make a joke about the quality of it, but nothing came.

She wasn't herself. She wouldn't be until this was over.

“I would really like that,” Undyne confessed weakly, trying to hide her face as she plugged her phone in and flipped it face-down. She told them what she'd like, then listened as the doctor updated her on Alphys.

Alphys, who was still sleeping deeply, barely stirring when she was given her asprin shot, and even though Undyne and the doctor spoke with normal-volume, Alphys still didn't wake up.

“It's normal,” the doctor spoke up, noticing Undyne's fearful expression. “We gave her a heavy sedative, because of the pain and the loss of blood. She'll wake up when her body is ready to – or when it complains.”

Undyne's lips twitched, but that was the best she could do. The doctor smiled and left her to herself, advising her to get up and move around at the very least.

Undyne sighed, looking back over at Alphys. At least she looked better in the morning light, less pale and sickly, and though she slept hard, she slept without discomfort. The doctor was right; she wasn't waking up anytime soon.

They thought.

But when Undyne got up to leave, she couldn't. Instead, she went to the washroom attached and used it to freshen up, washing her face and brushing her hair, before reapplying deodorant and straightening up her sleep-rumpled scrubs, yearning for her own clothes.

_Am I even getting them back? Were they too bloody to save?_

The idea made her stomach churn, and she covered her mouth, hunching over the sink for a moment. Thinking of her clothes reminded her of why she was there, and where that blood had come from, and it made her want to retch. Instead, she simply choked and coughed a few times, as she hadn't eaten since arriving. She cried a little as she calmed down, using the toilet and washing her hands, then her face, again.

Once she was sure that she didn't look like she'd been obviously crying, she walked out.

To her shock, she walked in to find someone else there.

Lindsey.

The lioness jumped back and turned around, and Undyne stared at her, completely still. She couldn't move, could barely breathe, could barely even _see_, except for the woman now standing in front of her.

_The same place she'd been when she'd stuck her tongue down my throat and almost ruined my life…_

Lindsey stared back, her own face pale. Her hair, usually smooth and wavy down her back, was pulled back into a messy bun. She wore no make-up, wore casual clothes, and looked like she hadn't slept, either. She’d been standing over Alphys, her hands at her sides and her expression grim.

“Get away from her,” Undyne suddenly snarled, seeing the proximity and not liking it.

Lindsey jumped again, looking burnt, before she nodded and moved away, instead moving to sit on the windowsill. Undyne watched her sharply, her hands clenched into shaking fists at her sides, but Lindsey merely looked back, and without the usual charm and sass. This was almost like a stranger, and despite herself, Undyne was curious.

“Why are you here?” Undyne demanded, sitting down on Alphys's bed, for once happy that she was still asleep. “How did you know _we_ were even here?”

Lindsey looked up, then, her eyes dark, and her whiskers twitched, her hands tightening their hold upon her knees.

“I… I don't know why,” she admitted. “But… but when you ran away, and never answered my messages, I figured something went wrong. It wasn't hard to put it together, after that.”

A great deal of anger filled Undyne from this.

First, Lindsey having the audacity to stalk her was a major reason, especially after her behaviour.

Second, she'd not only assumed that _her_ actions held a great deal of power, but enough to drive someone to suicide, and without any surprise.

Third, and most of all, was the idea that Lindsey had gotten to know Alphys – and Undyne – well enough to know _any_ of that.

Undyne looked away, tears filling her eyes. “Why the fuck did you make me do that?” she hissed out.

Unknown to her, unseen, was the slight twitch that came from Alphys's hands as she spoke.

Lindsey stared at her for a moment, long enough to get Undyne to look back.

_“Make_ you?” she then echoed. “I acted on what my feelings told me was right. I know you're attracted to me, just like I am to you--,”

“Shut up,” Undyne broke in.

Lindsey ignored her. “—and yes, I’m aware we are friends, first, but I can tell, Undyne. Just like Alphys could. You're attracted to me. You like me, too.”

“Yes, I like you!” Undyne exploded, losing her temper. “I like you, see you as a _friend_, a good and equal _friend! _I like you for your enthusiasm, your vigour, your passion, and I like you because you don't take shit and know a good horror flick! I'm not looking for a girlfriend!"

Lindsey smiled a little. “So you _don't_ find me beautiful?”

Undyne's throat dried up, before she croaked out, “How did you even get _in here?!”_

Lindsey's smile widened, making Undyne feel gross. “Visiting hours started an hour ago, and everyone knows I know you, and how,” she explained calmly.

“Like you give a shit about Alphy!” Undyne snorted.

Lindsey's smile faded a little. “I did, at first. I wasn't lying when I said I admired her, that she and you got me started,” she admitted. “But when she kept…” Her eyes narrowed. _“Clinging_, and interrupting, and getting in-between us… I stopped, after that.”

“She's my _wife!”_ Undyne cried, grabbing Alphys's left one tight. “Of _course_ she wants to be around me! Especially around someone she--,”

Undyne shut up before she could blurt it out, then concluded with, “Someone she sees as a _threat!”_

Lindsey sighed. “I couldn't help it. When I realised my feelings, and when I realised yours alongside my own, I couldn't hold it in, anymore, especially when Alphys accused me of doing it, first.”

“So you thought that by proving her right, it would be okay?” Undyne growled.

“Yes,” Lindsey agreed, making Undyne blink with surprise. “I thought once you knew _what_ you'd married, and if I showed you I was still here for you, then you would realise you could finally return your affection.”

“Return?!” Undyne cried. “I love _Alphy!”_

Lindsey stared into her eye. “But you _are_ attracted to me,” she pressed again.

_“Fine!”_ Undyne snapped, her eyes filling with more tears, especially when Lindsey smiled with satisfaction. “I _was_, Lindsey, I was! You _are_ stunning, and fun, and attractive, yes! But that shit went down the toilet when you fucking _forced kisses on me!!”_

Lindsey blinked slowly. “Force? You touched my face.”

“Yes, _force!”_ Undyne insisted. “And that was to pull you _away!_ I didn't fucking want _any_ of that, and you kept doing it, even when I said no! Spontaneous kisses are one thing, but _that?_ That was fucking not okay!”

By the end, her voice was high-pitched and shrill, her mind full of the images of that night, and she started shaking, the memory still enough to make her feel awful and afraid.

Lindsey had watched her the entire time, and by the end, she looked… regretful. “Oh,” she murmured, lowering her eyes back to her knees. “I'm… I’m sorry… I just thought… I thought it was you playing.”

_“No!!”_ Undyne shouted.

Suddenly, her hand was squeezed tight, and she turned – and found Alphys's eyes open and alert, and right on Undyne. Her expression was mixed – both scared and sorrowful. She opened her mouth – but was silenced when Undyne threw herself at her, hugging onto her so tightly it hurt. And yet she hugged back, happy to do so, her heart lifting ever so slightly.

When she looked over Undyne's shoulder, Alphys's eyes met Lindsey's, and they locked.

Lindsey said nothing, but didn't have to: her eyes burned, with fury and jealousy, and yet Alphys could also see something else…

_Regret?_

Undyne pulled away when she felt Alphys started shaking, turning to where she looked – and added her glare to it.

_“You_… you-you're _n-not_ welco-welcome here!” Alphys raised out, her hold on Undyne tightening.

Undyne said nothing, even when Lindsey looked at her for confirmation – or defence. All she saw on the lioness's face was disgust, and only when she looked at Alphys.

“Perhaps,” Lindsey answered, her voice cold and flat. “And yet I gotta ask: why would anyone even visit _you_, anyway?”

Alphys paled, hurt curling around her heart.

“Someone like you, so weak and stupid, who kills herself just at the mere _sight_ of a threat, of competition,” she went on, her eyes burning into Alphys's. "Who would even like you?"

“Shut up,” Undyne snapped. “Get out.”

Lindsey ignored her, continuing to talk to Alphys. “Even if you have her now, do you think you _deserve_ her? Especially after what you just did to keep her? Are you gonna do _this_ any time Undyne does shit you hate?”

Undyne rose to her feet, her hand held out – and a flash of light brought a spear to that hand, the tip pointed toward Lindsey.

“Out,” she repeated.

“N-no,” Alphys said. “W-wait”

The two looked back at her, and she looked at Lindsey.

“You asked me,” she murmured, “whether or not it should be up to Undyne if she wants to stay with me, or leave me to be with you, and my answer is still one that I haven't changed: of course she has a choice.”

Undyne's throat clogged up with a lump, and she couldn't look away from her wife, though her spear vanished.

“She always does, and always will,” Alphys continued, surprised that Lindsey had let her go on so long. “But you don't even believe that answer, do you? You asked it, but you also clearly think Undyne _can't_ think for herself, like I somehow control her.”

Lindsey opened her mouth, so Alphys stopped, but nothing came out, surprising only Undyne.

“You forced that kiss,” Alphys whispered. “I had a premonition of it, Lindsey. I saw you do it. I knew there was no choice for me. But…”

Here, her eyes went soft, and met Undyne's. “Oh, Undyne… I’m so sorry… I didn't know she'd forced you, and-and if I h-had… if I’d just _w-waited_ to listen--,”

Undyne tried to protest, but Lindsey beat her to it.

“That's on _you_, not me or Undyne,” she said coldly.

“I know,” Alphys agreed, again surprising Lindsey. “That's what I’m saying. The only one without a choice was Undyne – and moments after you asked me if she did.” Her eyes narrowed, this time. “Ironic, no?”

“No,” Lindsey snapped.

_“I_ get it,” Undyne confessed. “I didn't know about that.”

“Again, I’m sorry,” Alphys whispered back. “If we'd just talked--,”

“So even _you_ agree with me!” Lindsey cried, standing up. “You agree that Undyne _doesn't_ deserve someone like you, deserves someone _better!”_

“Yes,” Alphys said. “But Undyne has chosen me; she feels I am. And because she chose _freely_, and I feel the same, th-then…” Her voice choked off, surprising Undyne.

Alphys closed her eyes and lowered her head, then concluded with, “Then, in-in fact… I-I… I _do..._ d-deserve her.”

Undyne's whole body went still, her brain zeroing in on that last sentence, and she grinned at Alphys, her heart warming and her cheeks hurting.

“What did you just say?” Lindsey demanded.

Alphys looked mortified. “Oh-oh no, pl-please don't ask me to repeat it.”

Undyne instead lunged, and when they fell back onto Alphys's bed, a burst of giggles erupted from Alphys, muffled once Undyne kissed those lips to taste them.

_“You deserve me,”_ Undyne whispered between kisses. “You deserve me, because _I deserve you.”_

Alphys's eyes filled with tears. “You deserve--,”

“You,” Undyne finished.

Lindsey stood there, watching this in silence, only all of her indignant anger was gone. Instead, in its place, she felt agony, deep and pained agony, and realised that her dreams were over, now. She’d always wanted to teach about Undyne (and Alphys, the plan had been at first, before she met Undyne for real), wanting to become her friend, too.

But when they met, Lindsey's heart was stolen from her, and she realised she needed more than just friendship. And the more she learnt about Alphys, the less she liked, and the more she hated. It became clear that she had no chance while Alphys stood in her way, and all she wanted now was Undyne, as a partner as well as a friend.

She'd come here to convince Undyne to leave Alphys, to leave with herself, but it was all gone, now. Listening to their soft kisses and gentle exchanges, she realised that she'd tried to destroy something far stronger than herself, beyond what she could even understand or even imagine happen, and for Undyne.

Now, Lindsey was forced to accept that above anyone else, no matter how messed up she was, Alphys _was_ the one that Undyne loved, needed, and wanted.

Lindsey was not, and never would be.

Without a word, Lindsey grabbed her coat and purse and slipped out, so quietly that the couple didn't even see or hear her go.

They never saw her again.


	14. Chapter 14

However, not long after that final departure, Undyne heard her phone start chiming, and with alarming frequency, and she knew Lindsey had told someone.

She desperately tried to ignore it, especially now that Alphys was awake and asking for food, but it was Alphys, herself, that made her listen.

“Undyne…” she murmured, her brow furrowed. She kept sipping from a cup of water, her hands shaking a little from weakness. “What is that? What's going on?”

Undyne sighed again, glaring at her phone – one still plugged into the wall, but now fully-charged. “I think everyone's wondering what happened to us.”

Alphys frowned, before she went pale and looked away, her expression ashamed. She covered her mouth, wishing she could throw up, but luckily, she kept it down; it would have only been water, anyway.

Undyne had been reaching for the phone, but when she saw this, she reached for her wife, instead, touching her on the back and making her jump, then hunch over, her shoulders shaking.

“Hey,” Undyne murmured, moving closer to place both of her hands upon those shoulders. “Hey, c'mon. It's okay, baby.”

_“N-no,”_ Alphys croaked out, her eyes staring at her bandaged wrist. “Oh _fuck_, what… _wh-what have I d-done?_ Oh… oh _no_… I’m…”

She started crying, her sobs cutting off her speech, but by then, she was already pressed against Undyne's chest. She almost dropped the water, but Undyne simply took it and placed it aside for now, intent on comforting Alphys.

“Wh-why…?” Alphys whispered. “Why? _Why?!”_

“Why what?” Undyne asked.

“Why… why do you still l-love me?!” Alphys demanded_. “How_ can you still love me, after what I did?!"

Undyne bit her lip, then said, “I just do.”

“B-but… I did something _heinous_… and all over… over something that could've been cleared up if I'd just _talked_ to you!!”

“Yeah,” Undyne agreed. “But you panicked. It… it happens, Alphy.”

She felt her stomach clench, however. _Am I gonna have to tell her?_ she thought with slight dismay. _I never did, before…_

_But if she keeps on like this, if she keeps thinking like this, then I gotta tell her…_

_“How can you say that?!”_ Alphys cried, raising her head to look up at Undyne, squinting a little without her glasses. “H-how can you say such a thing?! I tried… I-I tried to… because I _mistakenly_ thought… when _you_ didn't even want it, and--,”

Undyne gently covered Alphys's mouth with her palm and closed her eye, lowering her head.

Alphys went silent, not because of the gesture, but because of Undyne's sudden change in mood.

“Alphy,” she murmured, keeping her hand in place and her eye closed. “I understand, okay? You don’t gotta worry about that.”

_Please, can we just leave it at that, and move on?_ she added silently.

But she knew her wife, and thus it was with no surprise when she heard Alphys's answer.

“I _do_ worry, because… I _hate_ myself for what I did to you!” She said it behind Undyne's palm, and her voice was hindered by it, but Undyne still understood.

_Dammit._

“I know you didn't mean it that way,” Undyne insisted quietly, her eye opening and flicking to the door for a moment, glad it was still closed. “I know you panicked, and you weren't in your right mind. You were scared. To you, your life was already over when you saw that, so of _course_ you'd…”

Her face fell, but Alphys stared at her, stunned.

She was right.

“H-how did you know that?” Alphys whispered, suddenly fearful of the answer.

Undyne swallowed hard. “Because… it's… it's how_ I_ felt... when I lost my eye, Alphy. Okay?”

There. It was finally out.

She’d kept it hidden from her forever, from almost everyone else, forever, but now, it was out, and there was no calling it back.

“You…” Alphys whispered, and finally, Undyne lowered her hand, letting it drop into her lap. _“You…?”_

Undyne nodded grimly. “It was an accident, remember? Training with Asgore gone wrong. But I never told you what I said to him, and what I did, after.”

“You just told me that you had to stay in the infirmary for a while, and that's when you were also given--,”

“Yes,” Undyne agreed quickly, cutting her off before she could say that aloud, too. Again, her eye went to the door. “But I left out some stuff. Like _why_ they gave that to me.”

“Because they hoped to regenerate your eye,” Alphys supplied, but Undyne shook her head.

“That's what I was _told_, but I knew it was a lie,” Undyne admitted. She felt Alphys turn toward her, and suddenly, her hands were held, and she felt a little better. “I knew the real reason, because_ I was_ _the reason_. I was refusing treatment. I was sabotaging my recovery.”

She closed her eye tight, feeling both fill with shamed tears. “I kept trying to kill myself, Alphy. The last thing I said to Dad – Asgore – was_ 'You killed me! You killed my future! I'm already dead!’_ I then stopped talking, and when I kept trying to fuck with my recovery, that's when they offered…”

She waved her hand, and she felt Alphys nod, as her forehead was now resting on her shoulder.

_When had that happened?_ Alphys wondered silently. _Could I have prevented it, somehow?_

“Dad _said_ it would make my eye grow back, which he hoped would change my mind about dying,” Undyne sighed. She felt one of Alphys’s arms go around her waist, and despite herself, her heart lifted, just a bit. “It was a last resort, because he knew: if he didn't do something, I _would_ kill myself. And he was right, Alphy.”

“I had no idea,” Alphys whispered, feeling shame of her own at that. “You always seem so confident, so invincible, so free.”

“Because he _was_ right,” Undyne said, surprising Alphys. “It _did_ give me the will to live, again. It gave me confidence, hope, and forgiveness. I was able to forgive Asgore, and I still kept fighting. Because I was given another chance.”

She paused, then added, “You get _unlimited_ chances with me, Alphy. Because I totally understand how it feels, and I know it makes you do crazy things. I forgave you the moment you opened your eyes, okay?"

Alphys reached up and touched Undyne's cheek, and she gently brushed her tears away with her thumb. Undyne looked up at searched her gaze – and was shocked to find a mirror, a warm light, a sweet acceptance…

“You don't care?” Undyne blurted out.

“Of course I do,” Alphys said firmly, misunderstanding. “I care because it hurt you, and I wasn't in your life, yet, to help you. And I care because… n-now I finally understand… _wh-why_ you're so forgiving…”

“You're wrong, and also right,” Undyne corrected. “I _do_ forgive you, but not just because I get it. I still would've done it, even if I still had both eyes, because I love you, and that's the _only_ reason I need.”

Alphys was crying by the time she finished, so Undyne simply gathered her close, again, and Alphys clung tight. She buried her face into Undyne's shoulder, just as Undyne did the same with her.

They shared a soft cry, again, only this time, it healed. It felt good. It felt cleansing, soothing, so that by the time food arrived for both of them, they were calm, even smiling at each other.

Somehow, they'd grown even closer, when both had thought such a thing was impossible.

Folly, that: together, nothing was impossible for them.

And soon, they knew that, too.

* * *

Alphys stayed for two more days, and Undyne stayed with her.

Once she got around to her phone, Undyne discovered that most messages were from Papyrus, followed closely by Asgore. Toriel contacted her three times, and sans only once _(“do you know where my sock is?”)_.

Even Mettaton texted her, and twice, and his messages surprised Undyne more than sans's.

_“Where are you? I'm on tour and can't be there, yet. Is Alphys stable?”_

And, an hour later:

_“Nevermind. I know where you are. I'll be there by tomorrow.”_

When Undyne showed her, Alphys scowled. “He probably was just worried his best mechanic was close to dying, not a friend.”

Undyne closed her mouth, realising she'd been about to reply when she shouldn't. She wasn't so sure, and was surprised that Alphys was, at all.

Over the years, while they hadn't become besties (like Alphys had secretly hoped), they had become at least friends, especially whenever ideas and inventions came to mind, and they worked together. Undyne had seen many such occasions, and with each one, she began to notice a change within the robot – ghostbot, she corrected herself – and it was of a kind she hadn't anticipated.

Irony, that.

But Alphys hadn't even noticed the _friendship_ part – or was in denial about it, thinking it too good to be true.

“Visitors,” Alphys then added, confused. “Who would even _want_ to visit me? Who would even _know_ to?”

Undyne's heart ached at that, and she looked down to hide it. “That's why they're asking _me_, Alphy: because they _do_ wanna see you. They probably tried your phone, first.”

Alphys blinked hard. “My phone!” she cried. “Where is--?”

“Chill, it's at home,” Undyne reported. “And before you ask: yes, I did bring your wallet. But I forgot the purse and phone.”

“N-no, if anything, that's good,” Alphys admitted. “I'm… I don't know what to say, yet.”

Undyne caught on. “Which is why you don't want visitors.”

Alphys nodded meekly.

Undyne smiled. “Okay. I'll warn them off until you say so.”

“Thank you,” Alphys murmured.

Undyne simply kissed her cheek in reply, then leaned back and started typing, going so fast that she got cramps in her hands, but she kept going. She left Mettaton's for last, unsure of how to phrase it, until she decided to be blunt about it.

_“No, toaster, she doesn't wanna see anyone, right now. Lindsey was not invited, despite whatever bullshit she claimed. She's poison. Don't trust her.”_

His reply was unexpected. _“I never did. I was dismayed when you did. And I don't care what you claim she said, I’m showing up there to see her whether you like it or not.”_

Undyne scowled. _“I don't care! She does! She's not ready for visits, bread-maker, so piss off until she says so!”_

When he didn't reply, she assumed he got the message, and with a satisfied nod, she closed the app and set her phone aside, shaking out her hands with a relieved sigh.

Alphys leaned back, too, gazing up at Undyne with a small smile, and the texts were forgotten.

The only visit that day was from Papyrus, and for Undyne, alone: he'd gone to grab her and Alphys some clean clothes, as well as Alphys's phone and purse. She’d been right to trust him, as he had a real flare for style, and always knew what looked cutest on the both of them. This time was no exception.

But then the second day rolled around, and Undyne realised her mistake too late.

Later, she was glad she did.

* * *

Undyne had stepped out to get some dinner in the hospital's cafeteria, while Alphys dozed lightly while she waited. She slept a great deal, and didn't fight it, knowing she needed to. The only times it became inconvenient were whenever a nurse had to disturb her rest, or if she needed the toilet, and those times were inevitable.

Until, however, supper rolled around.

Undyne had been gone five minutes when the door opened again, and Alphys didn't stir, completely out.

Her guest crept in, carrying a huge bouquet of flowers, then closed the door.

There was a long pause as her guest took in her state, before there were footsteps, ones that woke her when there grew close enough.

She stirred, then, struggling to open her eyes; sometimes, the meds worked too good, and she got sleep paralysis.

She wondered if she was hallucinating.

But then, a familiar hand touched her hand, taking it, and she managed to prise open her eyes – and smile with surprise.

“M-M-Metta!” she cried, squeezing his hand and turning toward him, lighting up without any regard for her personal shields. She forgot all about them, as in-between this entire ordeal and between therapy sessions, she was learning to be more open, less cautious, and more honest with her feelings.

She liked Mettaton – always had – and nothing had changed that. When she held his hand, her eyes shone with true affection.

He hadn't prepared for it, for any of it, and yet here he was. He set the bouquet down beside the bed without letting go of her hand, then sat down. She smiled wider, squinting up at him, and he looked into her eyes, unable to smile back – and he did try.

“Hullo,” she added.

Mettaton felt his soul ache; the expression on her face when she'd said that one word, the way it made him feel…

Undyne was right about him. Especially now that he realised how close he'd actually come to losing her forever.

“What happened, Alphys?” he asked her. “I heard rumours... Lady Toriel contacted me, said you'd had an accident, something about a teacher…”

Alphys's expression fell lower and lower the longer he went, and when her eyes filled with tears, he trailed off, shocked.

“I…” she whispered, her voice broken. “Metta, I…”

She still couldn't say it, yet. Not to anyone else. Instead, she looked away, but raised her arm and held it before his face, closing her eyes.

Mettaton blinked, his eyes looking at her forearm, only noticing the bandages wrapped around it, now. They were thick, intensive-care brand-type bandages, and when he adjusted his corneas to look beneath it, he saw the long line sewed closed upon her arm.

With that sight burnt into his memory forever, he felt a keen desire to suddenly shut off, just turn right off and sleep, so that he wouldn't have to accept this.

“I didn't want visitors,” Alphys added weakly, trying to defend herself. She pulled her arm away, holding it to her chest and rubbing the bandaged part with her other hand. “Pl-please g-go.”

For a moment, he almost obeyed, both from fear and woe. He even sat up.

But she flinched when he did, so he stopped and looked closer at her. She was tense, her eyes squeezed shut and her jaws clenched together, and she rocked slowly, like she was cradling her arm.

“Pl-please,” she repeated. “I know you h-h-hate me, now. It's-it's... it's okay.”

“I _don't!”_ he protested, making her jump. His voice had been squeaky, high-pitched, almost like it had been when he’d still been a ghost. “I don't hate you. I'm… I’m just… _What happened, Alphys?!”_

But Alphys didn't answer right away. She went still, breathing hard, before she repeated, “You _don't_ hate me?”

“Never,” he agreed.

This was also when Undyne returned, deciding to share her lunch with Alphys, and she opened the door – only to stop and back up, closing it just enough for her to spy and listen.

She didn't want to be right.

“I fucked up, Metta,” Alphys was saying, hurting Undyne's heart. “I had a premonition that came true, but I misunderstood it. I didn't… I didn't bother to even trust her. I just… _let_ my jealous fear control m-me.”

Mettaton was slowly starting to understand, the longer she went on. “The teacher?” he asked. “And Undyne?”

Then, when she flinched, again, he felt a wave of hot rage. “Did Undyne _cheat on you,_ Alphys?!” he cried.

Undyne almost threw herself in, then, to defend herself and throw him out, but she didn't have to.

“Of course not,” Alphys snapped. “And that's why I’m so stupid and gross! I claimed to trust her, but when that bitch kissed her, I just ran away to do something even _grosser_, and without even bothering to _talk_ to Undyne, to find out the _tr-truth!”_

Now everything – including what Toriel had said to him – made sense. “The new teacher put the moves on Undyne, and you thought Undyne wanted her to?”

Alphys nodded.

“But she didn't.”

Alphys nodded again, covering her face with her hands. “How can she still love me after that? And after what I did in reply?!”

Mettaton's eyes went back to Alphys's arm. “You cut your wrist,” he said. "And tried to bleed out." His voice was flat.

Alphys turned to him, her eyes looking larger than normal without her glasses, and she looked more hurt than she was.

“Yes,” she whispered. “I thought… she was leaving m-me… Without her, I’m _nothing_…”

Undyne's heart almost broke at that. It wasn't true, least of all to her.

“You're something,” Mettaton corrected gently, “with _or_ without her.” He hesitated, needing to ask. “Are you… getting help?”

She nodded.

“Good.”

Again, he paused, before he said, his voice soft and kind, “I'm glad you're safe, Alphys. I was scared. I thought you were... lost…”

Alphys looked back at him with surprise. The way he spoke…

Was she mistaken? _Were_ they friends, after all?

But then, Undyne lost her patience, and she barged in, pretending to just get there. “Yo, look, Alphy! Nanaimo crepes!”

She stopped, seeing Mettaton and feeling real anger, again. “Why are you here when I said no?”

“Because you’re not _my_ Captain,” he snapped back.

“Please stop,” Alphys broke in quickly. She touched Mettaton's arm, and he looked at her, his face softening. “Metta, please… Undyne is right. I'm not ready for visitors, even you, just now. Please give me more time.”

Mettaton looked like he wanted to argue, but when Undyne glowered murder at him, he changed his mind. He hugged Alphys and promised he would see her, then, glared at her wife, then left.

Once out the door, however, he staggered, then leaned against the wall, feeling that urge to shut down, again.

_She tried to kill herself,_ he thought. _And I was away. I had no idea she was suffering. _

_She never told me any of it, any time I texted her. Because she didn't even know she was my friend._

At that, he vowed that he would change that. He was desperate to prove to Alphys that yes, he _did_ care about her, and beyond her as just his mechanic. He realised now just how badly he'd neglected her, even long after he'd forgiven her, and he hated that she'd almost had to die to get him to see that.

_Not anymore_, he promised.

He left, then went to update the others, to let them all know that Alphys was okay.

A relief to everyone.


	15. Chapter 15

The rest of Alphys's stay went well, while also without any more visits. While many people contacted Undyne with concern and desire to at least talk to Alphys, she denied all of them any request. She did it with Alphys's blessing, but that probably wouldn't of stopped her – unless Alphys said the opposite, and wanted company.

But she didn't. The only company Alphys needed was company she already had: Undyne’s.

“You… y-you don't have to stay,” Alphys said – only once – to Undyne, after Mettaton left. "If you're tired, or-or need a break, or some space, some air--,”

“Alphy,” Undyne had broken in.

“Be-because I know hospitals are the very worst,” Alphys continued, babbling, now. “Because they _are_, they're the _worst_, s-so I know it's boring, and annoying, and I probably stink--,”

“Alphy!” Undyne tried again, this time with a small laugh.

“Well, I do, because I can't really move until the stupid transfusions are done, and—_mffph mrr murrrph!”_

Undyne had covered her mouth, and it took her a moment to even realise it.

“Alphy,” Undyne said, her voice a little sharp, so Alphys listened. “I know my options. Thanks, really, but I’d rather be here with you, okay?”

_“Wrrrrph?”_ Alphys asked, not expecting to be understood.

“Because… honestly… I just… wanna be _here.”_

Alphys reached up and pulled Undyne's hand from her mouth – and held it. “Why?” she repeated.

Undyne's eye went to hers, flicking between them. “Because, at home, I’d just go _bonkers_, Alphy. All I’d ever think about is you: how you are, what you're doing, how safe you are, if you're hurting, or eating…”

“I’m okay,” Alphys tried.

“Yeah, I know, because I’m here, seeing it,” Undyne answered, annoyed at being interrupted. “But if you just _said_ that, over the phone – video or not – I wouldn't. I wouldn't be able to believe it. I’d _need_ to see you.”

Alphys was staring at her by the end, stunned into silence. She felt… strange. Like she was finally seeing things she'd never seen before – never thought to even look for before now. Ever since they'd made her go to therapy – by then, she'd gone twice – she found herself observing Undyne more, keeping her mouth closed when she could be using it to protest, or correct her, or shoot her down, to instead listen to Undyne, hear the words she spoke...

_Oh… oh, no…_

She didn't realise she was crying until she heard herself sniffle, and when she did, Undyne's hands were on her face, brushing them away slowly and patiently – and thus only made them come out faster.

Undyne waited, like she always did, like she had already done during this very conversation, for Alphys to twist her own words around, to make them into a weapon with which to hurt both of them, but herself most of all.

Instead, she leaned forward, buried her face into Undyne's chest, and whispered, _“I'm so sorry…”_

When her hands reached up to grab hold of the front of Undyne's shirt, Alphys found herself gathered close and kissed quite insistently. With shock, she realised that Undyne actually understood what she was saying, what she was sorry for, and was rewarding her for it. It was the one apology she'd always wanted, the _only_ one she'd wanted, and the reason why was so important…

But she had to be sure, anyway. “Alphy…” she whispered, rocking them both slowly as they both cried, just a little. “_Why_ are you sorry…?”

Alphys went still for a moment before she understood. She clutched onto Undyne tighter, sniffling again, before she rasped out, “I'm so sorry I tried to kill myself…”

Her voice was tiny, thick with her grief, but Undyne felt it touch her heart and soul, and she knew Alphys finally spoke the truth. She was speechless, but luckily, Alphys was not.

“I just have so much trouble, Undyne…” she murmured, keeping her face buried between her wife's breasts. “Believing this is real… believing I’m really with you… that you really love me… that…” She squeezed her eyes shut. “So I just wait... for the day th-that you'll find someone better… and I’m just waiting, enjoying what I have while I d-do, because I-I know it'll go away, soon…”

Alphys paused to take a breath. Undyne stayed quiet, sensing she had more to say – and she was right.

“So when Lindsey showed up…” Alphys admitted. “I knew what it meant. I knew that you'd go. I knew my nightmare was about to come true.”

She paused. “I just… didn't bother to think _beyond_ it. I didn't think about you, nor your feelings. I didn't consider just _asking_ you, or asking _her_. Instead, I made it all worse… I ruined… I… I think I ruined…”

She choked, so Undyne interjected ar last. “Hey, you broke _nothing_,” she returned. “I admit: my heart got cracked. Seeing you leave, seeing you…” She shivered, pulling Alphys closer. “…like _that_, in the tub… If you hadn't woken up, then yeah… my heart _would_ be broken.”

“N-no,” Alphys said. “I mean, yes, but also, no. I meant… I ruined _Lindsey's_ life. I should've… walked. I should've… done something _better_…”

“Don’t blame yourself for what might happen to her,” Undyne demanded, feeling a spark of anger at the thought of the lioness. “She was the one being creepy, trying to break up a marriage that she _knew_ was happy…!"

“Ow…” Alphys squeaked out.

Undyne blinked, then let go quickly; she was squeezing Alphys, and hard.

Alphys relaxed again, and soon, so did Undyne.

“I _do_ feel bad,” Alphys then whispered. “It's not her fault she has feelings for you--,”

“Maybe,” Undyne growled, “but it _was_ her fault for not taking no as the right, proper answer, and from both of us.”

Alphys sighed, inwardly still feeling bad. She didn't like Lindsey, kind of hated her for all of this mess, but still felt bad.

_What is wrong with me?_ she thought angrily.

“Honestly?” Undyne murmured then, surprising Alphys. “A bit of me feels that way, too, Alphy. But that's because we're _monsters_; we give a shit about causing pain, because we know how badly it _feels,_ and that nobody likes feeling it. But even if we do, Alphy… It's neither of our faults.”

“I overreacted,” Alphys whispered, shame making her hot all over, and in the worst way.

Undyne swallowed hard, then nodded, her eye closed. “A little,” she agreed, worried she would upset Alphys. Instead, she felt her relax a little, so she continued. “But I get why. I get it, now. And you promised never to do it, again.”

“I did,” Alphys agreed, her voice a bit lighter. “And I meant it, too.”

“Good,” Undyne said. “Then let's leave it at that.”

It was good advice.

* * *

On the last morning, as Alphys started packing up her things, Undyne got a call from Toriel, and she took it in the hallway – just in case.

“I want you to know,” Toriel said, without any preamble after ‘hello', “that Lindsey no longer works at my school.”

Undyne blinked hard for a moment, unsure of what to say. She didn't even _think_ about that: the fact that, when all was said and done, Lindsey would still be in their lives thanks to the school. That she would have to face Lindsey – and Alphys would, too – _every day,_ knowing what happened between them and why.

But here, Toriel was saying it wasn't even going to be an issue, and it genuinely confused Undyne. “What happened?” she croaked out.

Toriel heaved a big sigh, clearly getting more comfortable on her end – confirmed when Undyne heard a low murmur that could only be Asgore's.

“Well,” Toriel then continued, “I knew something was up when you and Alphys didn't show up the next day, or answered me when I texted both of you – then called. I remembered that Lindsey mentioned seeing you that same night, so I tried calling her, but she didn't answer until the following day.”

Undyne could easily guess why, but she said nothing. Why draw more blame upon herself?

“She told me,” Toriel said, her voice suddenly growing cold, and Undyne felt worried, now. “That her interest in you had started as academic, but it was now romantic. She told me that her feelings were interfering with her work. She also told me that they were not reciprocated. Then, she quit.”

Undyne was silent.

Lindsey was not a quitter, she knew. She was the type that would stay snagged on the hook until she'd finished the entire worm. If anything, Undyne had expected her to ask Toriel for her help in getting rid of Alphys.

“I asked why,” Toriel was saying. “And she repeated her excuse, but also added something about how her affections hurt people, because she didn't know how to properly express them. She quit, again, and this time, I let her.”

Undyne breathed out, relieved and surprised by it. She hadn't realised how worried she had been until Toriel had finally said the words. “Did she say anything else?”

“Just that I should ask you for the full story, and to ask for forgiveness,” Toriel admitted. “Honestly, Undyne, I was going to fire her; her work really has suffered these past few days, and it was to the point where her class was called ‘the party class'.” She sighed again. “And now I have a whole class set up for a topic nobody even teaches, anymore…”

Undyne felt a lump in her throat, truly feeling bad about that. She knew Toriel had been so proud when someone had expressed avid interest in one of her teachers, one of several that she now considered family. She knew this was a lousy blow to her.

“We'll think of something, okay?” Undyne reassured her, meaning it. “I promise. This loss is on me, so--,”

“No, dear,” Toriel broke in sharply, startling Undyne. “It was hers.”

At that, Undyne knew that Toriel knew more than she was letting on, and was horrified to imagine what else Toriel knew.

“Do you know where we are, right now?” she asked.

Toriel hesitated, then said, “Yes.”

Undyne gritted her teeth, closing her eye. “How many people know from her, now, instead of us?”

“Just me. The others know Alphys was injured, but not how or why.”

“Alphy told everyone yesterday,” Undyne confessed. “She called you, too, yeah? It was her shrink's advice.”

“She did, but I already knew,” Toriel sighed. “And so did Gorey.”

Undyne had assumed that, anyway. “Okay. Thank you, Toriel. We'll get through this.”

“Take a week off,” Toriel suggested. “If more is needed, call me.”

Undyne agreed, and they hung up.

For a moment, Undyne leaned back against the nearest wall and closed her eye, holding her phone to her chest. Her hands shook, and she started crying, as quietly as she could.

She hated that Lindsey had done that, had violated their trust like that, had practically tattled on Alphys. She knew that the lioness was probably cruel when she'd explained it, knew she blamed Alphys for everything, and Undyne loathed that Toriel had heard it from her, first.

_At least Toriel didn't have any regrets,_ she added to herself. _She had been about to fire her, anyway, so if anything, at least one good thing came of it._

_I just hope she doesn't see Alphys any differently…_

Once she was calm, Undyne pocketed her phone and went back to Alphys, to help her pack the rest.

* * *

Papyrus drove them both back to their home, chatting about all that they'd missed while in the hospital. Undyne listened with both curiosity and jealousy, but Alphys merely slept through it, comforted by the feel of Undyne's embrace and the promise of home.

Once there, Papyrus carried their bags while Undyne helped Alphys to bed. She protested, saying that a cut wrist didn't mean her legs were broken, but Undyne ignored her. She didn't want to take any chances.

Papyrus brought their bags in and settled them where Undyne told him to (“In a corner somewhere, okay?”), while Undyne walked Alphys to their bed and helped her lie down, tucking her under the covers. Alphys melted into the bed, her eyes closed and her mind drifting, so that once she was settled, she was asleep.

Undyne smiled; she'd figured that would work, that if anything would get Alphys to sleep, it would be this bed.

When she returned, Papyrus was waiting for her, making coffee. She smiled and waved him over, and they hugged onto each other tight.

Undyne suddenly lost her smile, instead closing her eye and burying her face into her best friend's shoulder, starting to cry a little, feeling torn up and exhausted, inside. She had tried so hard with Alphys, making sure that she knew how much Undyne loved her, and how undying that love was and always would be.

Lately, she thought she'd seen acceptance in Alphys's eyes – fleeting, yes, but no less real – and she knew she was understood. But more often, those eyes would look away with shame, and Undyne hated that most of all. She hoped more therapy would help. She hoped—

“HEY,” Papyrus murmured, “YOU'RE OKAY. SHE'S OKAY, UNDYNE.”

She was sobbing. She didn't even feel it happening – she just… _was_. She couldn't help it, tried to, even, but she just couldn't. Instead, she nodded, and she felt Papyrus hold her tighter.

“I AM HERE,” he told her.

In reply, she sobbed louder, grateful to have him here, after all – coffee or no coffee. She invited him to stay while Alphys slept, and he agreed.

They spent the entire afternoon drinking coffee and talking about Alphys and Lindsey.

“EVEN _I_ WAS HOODWINKED,” Papyrus confessed sheepishly. “SHE JUST SEEMED SO KIND AND CHEERFUL.”

“’Cause she was,” Undyne murmured. “Until she realised she couldn't have what she wanted. Then she took it too far.”

“AGREED. I AM GLAD ALPHYS IS SAFE.”

Undyne flinched, then nodded, moving to take a sip of her coffee. “Me, too,” she agreed, her eye staring into her mug, unfocused and blank, full of images of what could've been.

She was glad they weren't.

Papyrus stayed well until sundown, but left after that. “OFTEN, IF I'M SEEN AFTER DARK, HUMANS RUN AWAY SCREAMING,” he'd explained once. They hugged again, then he left.

Undyne sighed, then sat back down on the couch for a moment, staring at the two now-empty mugs.

_How does he do that?_ she wondered for the millionth time. _How does he drink?_

She thought of it for a while, happy to have such an inane topic to think about. She was so absorbed that she missed a sound the first few times, then jolted to her feet once she heard it.

Her name, being called from the bedroom.

_Alphy_, she thought, rushing to the bedroom.

Once there, she saw that Alphys was awake and sitting up, rubbing her left wrist with a wince before she noticed Undyne, there.

“H-hi,” she greeted. “Sit with me?”

Undyne did, sitting on her side of the bed and turning to her, her heart pounding with fear.

Alphys was looking down at her hands. “Undyne, I-I was thinking… we've… been through a lot, me and you. I know I’m partly to blame – no, don't protest! I'm talking! – so I want to make it up to you.”

“You are,” Undyne broke in. “You're in therapy, you promised you won't do it, again--,”

“I know,” Alphys agreed. “But it's not enough for me.” She lowered her head. “I _know_, Undyne. I know you've been treating me with kid gloves since we got to the ER. I know you're scared to hurt me, just by touching me.”

Undyne looked down, now, her cheeks burning. _“You…”_ she growled. “It should be _illegal_ to know so much about someone else!”

“Ah, but once we were married, it became legal,” Alphys replied, a sorely-missed spark of humour coming to her eyes. “And I’m not fragile, Undyne. Not physically, at the very least. I've replaced the blood, am taking my depression meds, and will be seeing my therapist every week, now. I'm okay. I'm going to be _great.”_

Undyne looked up at her, desperate to believe her, but all she felt was a sinking in her gut. She bit her lip and looked away again – until Alphys's hands stopped her, and had her looking back up.

“You know how I know this, Undyne?” Alphys pressed.

Undyne shrugged. She didn't know.

Alphys rolled her eyes, surprising Undyne, before she sighed and clenched her teeth together. She closed her eyes tight, then hissed out, barely, “Be-because I.. I kn-know now… th-that I… d-d-deserve you…”

Undyne's whole body went warm, and in the good way, this time.

When she looked up at Undyne, Alphys jumped, shocked to see the expression on her face.

Their eyes met, however, and something snapped between them – and they both lunged.

Alphys hadn’t gotten out what else she wanted to say, but didn't care. Not for a while, anyway.

Just as Undyne liked it.


	16. Chapter 16

_Oh god, _Alphys was thinking over and over._ Oh god, oh god, oh god, I missed you…_

Every kiss she shared with Undyne made these thoughts grow louder. She felt Undyne's fingertips digging into her lower back, felt her pressing her body against Alphys's, felt the heat of it, smelt the scent of Undyne's desire…

But then, she moved back, reaching up and pushing Undyne away from her gently, and with clear hesitation and protest, Undyne broke their kiss. She stayed close but trembled all over, and when her eye opened, it was dark and unfocused with desire.

And honestly, for a moment, Alphys forgot why she’d stopped Undyne, instead pulling her back and resuming that kissing, making Undyne moan softly with yearning – and urgent need…

Then she remembered, and she gasped and pulled back. Undyne followed for a moment, trying to stay attached to her, but Alphys pushed her back, again. Undyne's eye wavered with confusion and worry, so Alphys smiled and reached up and cupped them around her wife's cheeks.

“Undyne, I would love to do what you have in mind,” she admitted, and Undyne's fingers twitched. “But I have another idea, one that requires us to wait.”

Undyne blinked, her worry crumbling into something softer: intrigue. “What are you talking about?”

“I was thinking…” Alphys began, leaning back and lowering her gaze, tangling her fingers together and in her lap, trying to pretend the bandage wasn't there. “I-I want to… I want to pr-prove to you th-that I… that I trust you, and-and that I meant wh-what I promised…”

Undyne blinked slowly, her heart fluttering a little at the expression on Alphys's face: the same expression she wore when she'd been about to…

“So I was wondering if-if… we could re-renew our… our-our wedding v-vows…” Alphys finished, proving Undyne right.

Undyne's entire body went hot, and she felt tears fill her eyes, but she was smiling so much her cheeks hurt.

“I’m sorry!’ Alphys cried suddenly, almost right after she finished her sentence. “Forget it, it's a dumb, dumb, stupid idea! _I'm_ dumb, I’m--!”

She squeaked, her vision blurring, until she found herself on her back, Undyne pouncing atop her with visible delight.

“You're fucking _awesome_, Alphy!” Undyne replied happily, kissing her between sentences. “Yes, let's do it! Let's have another wedding! Let's start off anew!”

Alphys giggled after each kiss, nodding with each sentence, and Undyne chuckled, her heart pounding with emotion.

“Th-thank you, Undyne,” Alphys murmured, her hands returning to Undyne's cheeks. “B-but it also m-means that… I want to _wait_. Until that night.”

Undyne stared at her for a moment, unable to speak, her mouth open slightly. She blinked hard, unsure of what she'd just heard.

“You wanna what? Wait for what?” Undyne asked, before her teeth sank down into her bottom lip, shifting her body a little and blushing harder.

Alphys’s eyes closed briefly when she did, her resolve growing very thin in those seconds, before she got a hold of herself. “To-to m-make love,” she blurted out.

Undyne went still, then sighed and lowered her head, before she pulled away, rolling over onto her side with her back to Alphys. She wrapped her arms around herself, feeling her entire body trembling, and she bit down on her lip hard to keep any sound from escaping, her eye wide but blind.

Alphys noticed, had watched the disappoint cloud Undyne's eye, but she also had seen something unexpected, something that made her heart ache – then start to race.

_Rejection_. Undyne thought she was being rejected.

Alphys saw that, plain as day. And the solution came to her so quickly that her body was already moving toward Undyne, her mind still far behind it. She watched her hands move with a grace of their own, sliding forward and reaching under, to find a way to pull Undyne's shirt off…

Undyne's body went rigid, like she'd been dipped in cement, and she felt just as cold. Alphys felt it like a cold slap across her own face, and she jerked away, starting to move her hands away.

But then, surprising them both, Undyne stopped Alphys’s hands midway. She held them for a moment, her breaths soft but fast, and her eyes kept filling over and over again with tears, dampening her hair and ear on one side. She felt Alphys start to move her body away, so she shook her head – and Alphys stayed.

Undyne had been wrong, after all; Alphys _wasn't_ rejecting her. That was the entire reason why Alphys had wanted a renewal in the first place: to prove it.

“Undyne,” Alphys then whispered, her breaths touching the back of Undyne's neck, making her shiver and close her eye, her body moving backwards toward Alphys. She nodded, and she pressed Alphys's palms back against her skin.

In response to that nod, Undyne felt Alphys begin to kiss her way from the nape of her neck, to along her ear, then her jawline, then her cheek, then her lips…

“Let me tide you over…” Alphys then whispered, and Undyne was hers.

That night, they didn't make love. Instead, Alphys gave Undyne pleasure, and Undyne enjoyed it, needing to be comforted, and needing Alphys, alone, to comfort her.

By the time Undyne even thought to reciprocate, she was passing out – and Alphys was encouraging her to, knowing she needed that, too.

Undyne did indeed fall asleep, just as Alphys had hoped, and for a while, Alphys watched her sleep, her heart racing both with the excitement of what they'd just done, with general affection toward Undyne, alongside what they were _going_ to do.

Undyne had done a great deal over the past few days, more than either had anticipated needing, and yet she did it all without complaint and usually with a happy smile. Alphys saw it all, catching her wife each time Undyne thought she'd nodded off, and she would then turn away and started to cry, one hand holding onto Alphys's tight…

That had happened a lot.

Alphys had also watched Undyne falling asleep on her feet, awake for far too long in some urgent need to keep watch over Alphys, later confessing that she was terrified that Lindsey would return, and when Undyne was asleep and Alphys was vulnerable, and…

And Undyne would cry, and Alphys would hold her…

But there were no traces of any of that, right now.

Instead, Alphys saw traces of a smile, of happy laughter around her eyes, of joy and pleasure in the tearlines down her cheeks…

Once Alphys was certain Undyne was asleep for good, only then did she allow her body to relax. That brought her to sleep almost right away, so quickly that Alphys didn't have any memories leading up to it.

A needed, refreshing sleep, for both of them.

* * *

The next time they woke, it was in the middle of the night, their internal clocks screwed over from the hospital stay, so they woke up and quickly made themselves some sandwiches, starving and aware they needed _real_ food.

They ate watching TV, keeping it on a news channel in order to catch up on what they'd missed. This was planned, as both had avoided social media and almost all electronic contact while in the hospital, worried the stress would upset either of them – or both. It was simply safer for everyone if they did it at home, as they truly were the best company for each other, especially in a crisis.

But _was_ there a crisis?

Both were surprised to discover that there might not be anything to worry about, after all. It was very hard to try and keep one step ahead of the general public's opinion, and out of everyone, Alphys and Undyne had the worst time trying to figure out what it was and how to find out. Even Papyrus, as bumbling as he could be in public, still knew how to make a great speech, and he won people over easily.

Undyne and Alphys were seen, thanks to how they'd behaved toward Frisk Underground, as the fuck-ups of the group, and they all knew it.

Undyne decided it meant she didn't have to care about their opinions, so she didn't. Alphys publicly agreed with her, even pretended it was true whenever anyone asked, on- or offline. But in private, the truth was that it drove her _insane_ – the need to know, the desire to correct misconceptions – and she had trouble pretending not to care...

So it was no surprise that Alphys was glued to the screen the second it turned on, absently feeding herself while watching as much at once as she could.

Meanwhile, beside her, Undyne leaned back and barely watched, perfectly fine with just listening for now, and all her ears had picked up so far was stupidity (human celebrity gossip). But she did notice that, the longer the segment went on, the more upset Alphys grew, so she watched _her_, instead – and was soon glad she did.

When the commercial came on, Alphys was visibly agitated, a hand to her mouth and her teeth digging into her claws, the cuticles around most already torn and bloody. Her eyes wavered, and she didn't look away.

“Alphy,” Undyne started,

But Alphys said, at the same time, “Nobody cared.”

Undyne blinked, confused by this, thinking Alphys was changing subjects and seemingly out of no where.

Alphys's eyes filled with tears, and they spilled over right away, just as she closed them.

Undyne felt her stomach sink, and she moved closer. “Hey,” she murmured, wrapping her arms around Alphys’s waist. “What's wrong? Who didn't care about what?”

_“Anyone,”_ Alphys repeated, her voice angry and hurt. “Ab-about _m-me!”_

Undyne frowned, her eye flicking back to the TV screen for a moment before returning to Alphys, who was shaking, now. She bit her lip, then tried to comfort her with, “Alphy, we just started watching. It's only been like fifteen minutes. Give ‘em time.”

Alphys closed her eyes for a moment, so Undyne continued. “Besides, Frisk told me that they already held a press conference about it two days ago, remember?”

Alphys nodded, but her tears didn't stop. She sniffled, but she was silent. "I just haven't watched it, yet."

“Alphy,” Undyne urged, nudging her a little. “People cared, baby. Did you check your phone, yet? Your email?”

Alphys shook her head, blushing with embarrassment. She was too cowardly to look at it, knowing she had to at least start to, eventually, but terrified of being triggered by anything she received.

“You wanna do it together?”

Alphys suddenly sagged in Undyne's arms, and she turned her face away from the screen and buried it into Undyne's shoulder, nodding against it. Undyne smiled and pulled her into her lap, and Alphys cuddled into her embrace, just as eager for physical affection as Undyne.

“We're probably next,” Undyne then added, noticing that Alphys remained snuggled, her face still hidden by Undyne's shoulder. “Monster gossip and politics are usually last in human news, remember?”

“Mm,” Alphys agreed, her voice muffled. “Maybe we should watch _monster_ news. Is there a laptop or tablet close by?”

“Just our phones,” Undyne sighed, after looking around for a moment. “Look, let's just watch and assess the damage. If it's bad, we can count on the Underground alumni to still have our backs.”

That was true, and Alphys knew it. Even as a fuck-up, she was still a monster, and still one of the Seven (Eight, if you included Frisk), and because she’d still managed to save lives that otherwise would have been lost, most monsters had forgiven her by now.

The commercials ended, and Alphys became tense, her grip on Undyne's arm tightening. Undyne kissed her forehead but kept her eye on the screen, just as worried – if not _more_ worried – than Alphys.

At first, the anchors talked about inane politics and idle gossip, but it was obvious that they were stalling. Just before Alphys almost threw something at the TV, they finally got to it.

There was no crisis; this was true. Frisk was to thank for that.

But it wasn't good.

“And now we bring you the latest update on Doctor Alphys and her wife, Captain Undyne, and their co-worker, Professor Sekhmet.”

Both women flinched, especially when all three women's faces came up on the screen – in a clear triangle formation, with Undyne in the middle. Seeing Lindsey's face again, however the context, was not something either had prepared for.

It hurt.

“It appears that the Professor has left town, as she has either been dismissed or has resigned from Queen Toriel's school for monster children,” the anchor went on, looking almost bored but cheerful about it. “She left perhaps a day or two ago, and hasn't been seen since. She is active on social media, but has yet to mention anything about the events leading up to her exit.”

“Additionally,” their co-anchor picked up, just as blandly, “the Doctor has been released from hospital and into the care of the Captain, and it looks as if they will remain married.”

They paused as they went off script, their eyes meeting. This was expected, as usually with the night shows, the anchors were given more freedom of opinion, in order to try and bring in more ratings.

“So, then, we have a class without a teacher, a topic to make that class, and the topic herself remains a teacher. As does her wife.”

“Doctor Alphys, the one who did _those_ experiments, didn't she?”

“Maybe that's what came up? Sekhmet perhaps found the truth, and couldn't stay?”

“Anyone can find out the truth about that.”

That was true; Alphys had written and published an academic paper all about her research, and posted it online for all the world to see. She'd even written it in plain language, so no one could misunderstand what she wrote or misinterpret it.

“C'mon,” the first anchor said, waving a hand in the air. “Let's stop pretending to be stupid. We know that she had a thing for the Captain, and likely left once she found out the Captain has a thing for the Doctor.”

“What about the _Doctor?_ What if Sekhmet was in love with _her?”_

It was said with incredulity, and as expected, they looked at each other and, as if on cue, laughed at such a thing.

Alphys felt her whole body flush with shame, and she looked away, unable to keep tears from coming to her eyes. But when Undyne moved to turn it off, she was stopped, and Alphys's eyes remained on the screen.

Once they'd calmed down, the conversation resumed. “No, no, we both know that it was the Captain that was pursued. Guess she really does love the Doctor, warts and all.”

“Perhaps there's something there that monsters get, but we do not?”

“Finally, something right,” Undyne growled.

Alphys said nothing; she'd brought her knees up and was hiding behind them, her arms wrapped around her legs. She was still listening, however.

“Maybe,” the other anchor said, “but Sekhmet didn't see it, clearly. Otherwise, there would be – what do they call it? – a triad?”

At that, the topic became about triads, so when Undyne moved to turn it off, Alphys let her.

There was a small pause, before Alphys cried, “I'm sorry that I don't want to share you!”

Undyne was so surprised that she coughed out a laugh, leaning over to hug onto Alphys with affection – something that Alphys also allowed. She didn't move, however, so Undyne leaned closer and nuzzled her cheek with her own.

Alphys sighed, then raised her head, and Undyne smiled at her. “I don't wanna be shared,” she answered. “So we're good.”

Alphys stared up at her, finding herself able to believe this – to trust Undyne's words – and it felt _wonderful_. She nodded, and Undyne smiled wider, her eye gleaming.

“Hey,” Undyne added, and Alphys finally smiled, leaning forward to press her forehead to Undyne's. “It's gonna be okay. We'll figure it all out, okay? Trust me.”

“I do,” Alphys answered right away.

And, for the very first time, it was completely true.

Alphys had trusted Undyne, before, but always with a “but if she does/doesn't do it, I understand” added to it. She didn't add it silently – she didn't even think it – and thus she knew she had finally managed to grow past that fear.

She'd faced it down and, though hurt, she'd still survived it.

It was true.

And Undyne could hear it, in Alphys's words, her expression and her body language – but also, within her eyes, and for the first time.

Undyne grinned, just as Alphys felt herself blush again, but for different reasons.

Therefore, when Undyne threw herself at Alphys, Alphys was prepared – and simply caught her.

Another first. But not the last.

That was for certain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost done.


	17. Chapter 17

They spent their week off well, using it to prepare for their vow renewal, which they decided to have the weekend before they were due back to work, to make it even more meaningful.

Granted, when the hasty invitations went out, they were returned with grumpy confirmations; it _was_ rather last minute, but neither could help it. Both Alphys and Undyne were eager to start anew, and they both needed this ceremony for it, to actually _feel_ it renewed.

Some things, however, didn't need to be. They decided to wear their wedding clothes, again, as they still fit and had only really been worn, at _most_, four times. And the clothes had been kept protected for three years; they looked practically new.

What was new, however, was the decision to get new, secondary wedding rings, to match their first set.

For Alphys, it was to remind her that Undyne _could_ be trusted – and that she _did_ deserve to be married to her, despite the scar that could now be seen just beneath the palm of that ringed hand.

For Undyne, it was a reminder to pay more attention to Alphys, to trust her intuition better, and to also be self-aware of situations that might end in unhappiness – but most of all, not to take Alphys for granted.

They went out shopping together for those rings, and found a perfect matching set: a gold band with white stones, and a silver band with blue stones. They went well with their other rings, and they were also very pretty. Undyne still wore hers around her neck (save special occasions) and Alphys put hers on her finger, and this was before they even left the store. They promised to take them off the day of, to replace them during the ceremony, but for now, both preferred to wear them now.

The idea was to have the renewal ceremony with a handful of people, then move from that small venue to a huge one, so that they could party like the monsters they were. They chose the monsters' aboveground city's City Hall for the ceremony, then decided to move the party Underground and in the Palace of New Home – Asgore and Toriel's gift to them (but only for the day). Then, everyone would either stay Underground or head back up home, depending on the monster – or human.

_That_ was something Alphys had been sceptical about. Frisk's presence was obviously a given, as they'd pestered both for hours at a time until Undyne finally snapped and told them that '_yes_, they could be _both_ the flower girl _and_ the best man, so _shut up, please,'_ and Alphys had agreed with a laugh.

This delighted Frisk, as it fit in nicely with their own dualism, in turn making everyone else happy.

But _other_ humans?

While Frisk did say that they weren't too sure about it, either, they had recommended that the brides prepare for a _few_ human guests, just in case.

Alphys didn't want to; she didn't want to invite any other humans. She didn't really trust them much, as with this entire scandal, they made her out to be some kind of sex-crazed she-devil. Undyne wasn't thrilled with them, either, but she was more open to it, so she made sure there was _some_ human food.

Everything was meticulously planned, and while there was room for failure, there wasn't much.

The ceremony was foolsafe, failsafe, and promised great fun.

Thus it was with obvious dismay that, upon waking, it was raining.

* * *

“Oh…” Alphys moaned softly, her eyes wavering, before filling with tears. She pressed her palms to the window, feeling the chill of the September rain and shivering from it. “It's… _not_ happening…”

Undyne, who'd been tying on her shoes (they had ribbons that were tied around each of her shins, ending just under the knee), looked up with such force that Alphys heard her neck crack.

_“What?!”_ Undyne demanded, forgetting her other shoe and pushing herself up from the floor. Instead of looking out the window, she rounded on Alphys and pulled her hands away from it, taking them into her own to warm them. “What's not happening?”

Alphys stared up at her, blushing. She’d forgotten how stunning Undyne's dress looked, and she couldn’t help her body's reaction – especially after close to five days of abstinence.

Undyne's dress was bright blue, a royal blue that caught the eye in any crowd. It was a one-piece, made of soft cotton and falling just above her knees, in a flowing A-line that flattered her modest waist. It had a sweetheart neckline that was sleeveless, having only straps that tied behind her neck, leaving her back exposed – a lovely, muscular, scarred back, one that Alphys loved to press against and just _touch_…

“Alphy?” Undyne called, squeezing her shoulders. She blinked hard and looked up, reaching up quickly to keep her towel in place – she had just finished showering and was starting to get dressed, too.

_Except_…

“It's raining,” Alphys murmured. “We never planned for it. It's not happening, today…”

“Bullshit,” Undyne replied, but her tone was kind and patient. “Rain _or_ shine, Alphy, _we are doing this._ I'm a damned fish; I can take it. Can't you?”

Alphys blushed again. “Of course! It doesn't bother me! But I’m afraid people will be… scared off…”

“Good!” Undyne agreed, surprising Alphys. “I don't want them there if a bit of water makes them into _wusses_. Besides, we're only doing the _ceremony_ aboveground, remember, love?”

Alphys did, now, and she nodded, feeling both comforted and embarrassed. She couldn't help it; she'd been like that all week, worrying over the slightest issue that come up, and this seemed like the universe telling her to run.

But with Undyne's words, she felt better. It _would_ scare off the people she likely wouldn't of wanted at the party, especially if they were humans. She nodded slowly, and with a grin, Undyne kissed the tip of her nose.

“Get dressed, nerd,” she then advised. “The sooner you're dressed, the sooner I can undress.”

She left Alphys spluttering and blushing with a triumphant cackle – but didn't take it back, either.

A promising start.

* * *

If they hadn't asked Papyrus to film it, Alphys would have assumed it never happened, as she didn't remember much of the ceremony, itself.

Undyne did, but only because she had spent _hours_ on her vows.

Alphys hadn't; the words she'd wanted to say came easily to her, and she filled several cue-cards that she'd stuffed into the pocket of her suit.

The suit itself was dark green, cut to flatter Alphys's generous curves, and the material was a cotton-linen blend, making it soft but also loose. She wore a light grey shirt underneath, one without sleeves and lined in lace, and the sleeves, pants, and hems of the suit were long and baggy – just as she liked it.

But the moment it happened, Alphys forgot she had those cards. Her hands were being held by Undyne's, and she didn't want to let go. Even when Undyne started to, so that she _could_ grab the cards, Alphys held fast – and blurted out what came to her, instead, partly from memory, but mostly, from her heart.

“I _love_ you,” she stammered, her face red, her entire body breaking into a sweat. “I love you _so much_, I love you more than I _ever_ thought I could love, at all. You taught me _how_ to love, and you taught me how to _live_. All I want is to be your wife. Forever.”

She stopped to take a breath – and ran out of words. She closed her mouth, looking terrified, but when she finally gathered the courage to look up – she was shocked by what she saw.

Undyne was _crying_, and in a way that made Alphys stop breathing, and for quite some time. She cried with a smile, a happy, shocked, smile, and she didn't even seem to notice her own tears.

“I love you, too, Alphy,” Undyne murmured. She’d memorised her vows, and luckily didn't forget them (this time). “Since we first met, since you talked to me about the abyss, since you started sending me emails… I've loved you. You make me a better person, Alphy. You make me remember that I _can_ be soft, vulnerable, and that you _won't_ take advantage of that. I know I can trust you, Alphy.”

Alphys flinched, however, so Undyne hurriedly went on, understanding why.

“I _can_. I know you got scared – so did I,” she said, her voice wavering little. “But Alphy, even through the worst of it, all I cared about was _you_. All I care about _is_ you. All I _want_ to care about is…” Her voice broke, and she lowered her head. “…_you_, Alphy… _I love you_…”

Alphys moved closer, stood on her toes, and kissed Undyne's quivering lips still. Undyne returned it, clinging to her, before there were obvious coughs and throat-clearings, and they broke apart, sharing the same smile.

After that, it was more blurriness; Alphys vaguely remembered signing the license before having to stand up again, before finally, their vows were declared renewed, and they could kiss. They of course did, and with it came applause and cheers, this time.

It was the start of something incredible – for a second time.

* * *

The rest of the time was spent in another blur of happiness, the kind of which neither had ever experienced before, even with their first wedding.

Undyne was so pleased and proud of the amount of people who decided to attend – including humans. There were _real humans,_ there, humans who knew them _and_ wanted to support them. They ended up _running out_ of human food, and it brought along a funny game (“What Monster Foods Can Humans Eat Without Puking?”). She loved every second of it.

Alphys, however, was reserved. She was happy, and made sure it showed, but she was also inwardly berating herself, especially whenever she felt moments of joy.

_I was willing to throw this all away._

_I was fine with leaving this all behind._

_I accepted that someone else would live this life instead of me…_

“Hey you,” Undyne's voice suddenly broke in, almost every time. “C'mere.”

And, without any knowledge, Undyne helped Alphys banish each thought away. If anything, it meant more, that way. She did it all because she wanted to.

It was why, by the end of the night, Alphys suddenly had a solution to their last problem.

* * *

“G-give it to _me.”_

Toriel jumped, her sip of wine splashing over the rim of her glass, instead, and almost ruining the front of her dress. She blinked blurry eyes and looked up, and saw that Alphys stood there with her hands on her hips, her head held as high as she could. Her expression was set, confident.

It was clear that, in some way, Alphys was intoxicated.

It was true, and she did sway a little, but her mind was clear enough, even if her words slurred a little. “I m-mean it!” she insisted. “Give i-it to _m-me_! I _d-d-deserve_ it!”

Toriel stared at her. “Doctor, I would love to, but I don't know what you want,” she admitted, her words a little slow.

Alphys blinked back, then blushed. “O-oh! I'm sorry, I thought I already had! I-I just was thinking about… wh-what happened…”

And here, she looked away, her hand going to her wrist, her fingers tracing the still-tender scar, there. “And-and I remembered that there are no teachers f-for the cl-class...”

She trailed off, looking hopeful that it was enough.

Toriel's eyes had focused, however, and understood. “_You_ want to teach the Undyne class?” she clarified.

“Who else is better qualified?” Alphys replied.

“Undyne,” Toriel answered, making Alphys blush deeper.

“Well…_ I_ want it!” Alphys snapped, her hands going back to her hips. “I _deserve_ it! _You owe me!”_

Toriel raised her eyebrows, but Asgore, who they both thought was sleeping on the table, slowly raised a hand, then a thumb, pointing it upwards. He kept it there for a moment, before letting it go limp – and he resumed snoring, like before.

“Well,” Toriel echoed, her eyes on her husband, now. “I _do_ understand what marriage renewal does to someone. You want to restart, to create anew.”

“And,” Alphys added, “I want to kick those students' asses in. For thinking it a _party_ class.”

Toriel smiled at that; clearly, Undyne had told Alphys what they'd talked about. “You know what? Done. You can teach it. I know Undyne would rather teach gym and health, anyway.”

“She's too shy,” Alphys said.

Toriel lost her speech after that, the idea of Undyne being shy that alien to her, but it didn't matter; Alphys was already done.

“Thank,” she said sincerely, shaking Toriel's hand. “I have to go now.” She smiled, just a little, but Toriel saw within it genuine pleasure, and realised that Alphys had _really_ wanted this. She nodded, and with it, Alphys bolted back to Undyne's side, before hiding behind her for at least an hour.

But she was happy. Her tail was, like the rest of the party, a blur.

* * *

The party ended when Undyne passed out on one of the tables, a shot glass still in her hand. It made everyone but Alphys laugh – even Undyne chuckled when she came to – but it meant the night was over.

Alphys made Mettaton announce it, which he did with some sulkiness to his voice. Once Undyne was awake and drinking a little water, she agreed with Alphys, and that was it.

They were amongst the first to leave, as Undyne was drunk and Alphys was stoned, and they needed to get home and sleep it off, neither willing to sleep in the Palace. They were walked home by Papyrus and sans, as the brothers worried (for different reasons) for their safety on the way home, and wanted to make sure both brides arrived home safely.

Thanks to the brothers, they did, and once inside, they didn't even bother with the lights; both just walked into their bedroom, helped each other undress, before they both curled up in their bed and passed out, too tired to even think of making love.

_Yet_.

But it was worth it.

The entire night was worth it.

Neither regretted their decision to sleep.

Especially once the morning arrived.


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NSFW

Alphys awoke slowly, unsure of where she was or what had torn her away from her dreams. She shivered, opening her eyes and reaching up before she even knew it, so that when her hands touched an arm, she jumped – and Undyne chuckled. Her arms were around Alphys's waist, reaching up so that her palms pressed against the skin above each breast – a breast, she now remembered, that was naked, as they’d been so tired that all they'd done was strip down to underwear and pass out.

Now, instead of shivering, Alphys went hot, as the more she woke up, the more her body did, too, and she felt Undyne's body pressing closely against her back, so close that she could feel how hard her nipples were – they poked into her back. Her leg slowly slid up from Alphys's shin, to her thigh, then her hip, where it hooked around it quite tightly. Alphys reached out and curled her tail around the thigh of that leg, and this time, when Undyne chuckled, Alphys felt the vibrations of it against the nape of her neck – where Undyne was pressing her lips.

Alphys was breathing very hard, now, feeling hot and shaky and suddenly very, _very_ needy. But even as she felt those feelings rise up within her, she felt another one alongside them, one that was not welcome.

It said: _You do not deserve this pleasure, after all that you have done._

And Alphys agreed with that voice above the rest.

Her body went cold and rigid, and she let her hands drop from Undyne's arm, staring at them once they'd flopped right before her eyes – eyes that couldn't see much beyond that at the moment. Her tail started to tremble, but she didn't remove it.

It was that gesture, alone, that had Undyne remaining in place. She wasn't eager to push Alphys into doing something she didn't want to, but there was a different between reluctance, and what Alphys was feeling – what she _knew_ Alphys was feeling – and Undyne wished it was as simple as reluctance…

She pushed closer to Alphys, moving her hand down so that they remained on her own forearms, instead, but still around Alphys. Since she made no move to stop this, Undyne pressed her cheek against her back and whispered, “Talk to me, Alphy…?”

It was what Alphys needed to hear, to be brave enough to speak, but she spoke quickly, to get it all out at once, and thus never again.

“I'm scared, Undyne. I don't mean to be, because I want this so much, but I’m honestly _terrified_. We haven't made love since I… did the thing… and I’m scared… _I’m_ _so scared,_ _Undyne_…_ I don't want to fuck this up_…”

Her voice suddenly broke, and before she knew it, she was sobbing into her own hands, her entire body shaking with grief. She _was_ terrified, that was true, and most of all of doing the wrong thing.

All she'd done since this began had been wrong things...

Undyne, however, opened her eye and thought about it, making sure to keep close – and Alphys closer. It kept Alphys calm, this gentle holding, and _that_ kept _Undyne_ calm.

“I know you don't,” Undyne answered after a moment, closing her eye, again. “I don't, either. But all we can do to make sure that we don't is to _try_, Alphy. We got through our vow renewal. We got through the party. Now, I want us to get through this last hurdle: the fear of lost intimacy.”

Alphys bit her lip, her eyes filling with hot, ashamed tears. Undyne knew her so well, and had laid it out so easily, that she wished she could just disappear with a snap, like that movie series everyone talked about but she found too boring to keep track of.

She nodded, though, making sure that Undyne knew she did it. Just because it upset her didn't make it any less true.

“Okay,” Undyne agreed, kissing the back of Alphys's head gently.

One hand moved away to capture one of Alphys's – and she saw it was both of their left hands. Undyne pulled Alphys's up to eye-level, so that they could both see the new rings they were both currently wearing.

“See this?” Undyne wondered.

Alphys nodded slightly, staring at it, too. It sparkled, even in the dim light; it was another rainy day.

“This isn't just a piece of metal and glass,” Undyne murmured, her voice both soft and firm, in a way only a Captain could truly speak. “This is a symbol of our renewed love. I'm big on symbols, Alphy. And I know you are, too.”

Alphys smiled a little, nodding. She sniffled a little, but her smile remained.

“So you know that I don't just use symbols willy-nilly,” Undyne continued. She waited for another nod, then added, “So believe me when I say this: I don't want you to leave me, and I don't want to leave you, Alphy. Since we both agree on this, let's agree never to let each other go.”

Alphys felt her heart melting within her breast, her entire soul aching for Undyne, and she nodded, her other hand reaching up and grabbing at Undyne's left, so that she could hold it with both hands. She then pressed Undyne's palm between her breasts and over that heart, and Undyne closed her eye and listened with both her ears and her hand.

Alphys's heart beat fast, likely due to affection and excitement and emotion, but it beat strong and healthily. Alphys then dragged that hand to her wrist, closing Undyne's fingers over the bandages. It didn't hurt if pressed lightly, so when Undyne protested, Alphys shushed her, instead pressing her index and middle fingers over the arteries in her wrist, the ones not covered by bandage.

The ones below the parts that she had cut open and apart, that were still healing, that still needed occasional draining and treatment.

Undyne felt it, feeling her tears return, and she trembled from them, trying to weep quietly. Instead, she felt her hands removed, then let go of, before Alphys turned around and laid on her side, facing Undyne.

Their eyes met, and sparked.

Alphys reached out and held Undyne's face between her hands, and Undyne closed her eye, her hands closing over Alphys's forearms tightly, lowering her head forward. Alphys pressed her forehead against Undyne's, and when their eyes opened and met, again, they did the only thing that they needed most above all.

They kissed.

It was different than last night's goodnight kisses had been. It was different than the kisses during the entire chaste five days. 

_This_ was unrestrained, from having to restrain it for, it felt like, much too long.

Therefore, a simple kiss was like a spark to a dry patch of gunpower, starting at the beginning of a pathway that let right to an overstuffed keg.

The kiss grew hot, and when Alphys shivered, it was with urgent need, not a chill. Her arms went around Undyne's neck, her hands pulling back her hair and tugging on it, and she watched as Undyne jerked back and growled, baring her teeth when their eyes met – especially when Alphys smiled coyly.

Undyne's eye sparked, and before she knew it, Alphys felt _her_ hands go back and grab hold of her backside, Undyne's hands squeezing those generous cheeks rather hard, and when Alphys felt a bite of nail, her eyes hazed over, then closed – and she reached down to tug Undyne's underwear off.

But Undyne suddenly had an idea, and it involved _Alphys_ being naked, not herself – _yet_. She lunged, pouncing upon Alphys and pinning her onto her back. Alphys moaned softly, reaching up to grab hold, and Undyne couldn’t resist, pressing down and kissing Alphys's lips, Alphys kissing back with eager fervour that Undyne hadn't seen in _months_...

_We need this,_ she realised. _It's not about the abstinence at all; it's because Lindsey's gone, and she can finally relax…_

When she felt Alphys's hands slip under her underpants, Undyne quickly jerked away and grabbed Alphys's wrists, then pinned them at her sides, pushing her tongue between Alphys's lips – and bringing up another moan from her, her body squirming beneath Undyne's.

Undyne pulled one hand away, breaking their kiss to bite down at the curve of Alphys’s neck, and she cried out, arching her back when she felt a stab of heat from it. Undyne grinned, as her hand had finally found the waistband of Alphys's underwear, and before Alphys could so much as try to stop her, Undyne had them off and tossed to the floor.

Alphys squeaked, blushing a little – only to gasp when Undyne's fingers dipped between her legs, sliding between _very_ slick folds. Undyne licked her lips, feeling her own body respond to this discovery, and she knew what to do, next.

Alphys was panting by then, already sweating and lost within the arms of her wife. Her mind was _consumed_ with sex, with _Undyne's_ sex, and she couldn't think of anything else – not even her own failures or mistakes.

All she could hear was Undyne.

All she could feel was Undyne's pleasure.

All she had now was what she'd wanted from the very start...

Alphys suddenly lost all thoughts, as Undyne had moved her fingers up and into Alphys's cunt, and she jerked back, crying out and shutting her eyes tight. Her hands went to Undyne’s back, her claws digging in, and Undyne grinned, her eye remaining on Alphys's face the entire time.

But before she did, she paused, giving Alphys enough time to both adjust to her fingers, and to also say no if she wanted to. When she did not, Undyne pushed her fingers deeper, and when Alphys gasped, she felt her cunt’s muscles clench around her fingers, and Undyne felt _her_ whole body go hot with arousal.

Alphys was slick, but built smaller on the inside than the outside. It was why Undyne rarely used more than one finger when giving her hand-jobs, and when she used more, she hesitated like she had, now.

But Alphys _loved_ being fingered, especially when Undyne's long piano fingers managed to find that deeply-hidden button that made her go _crazy_ if stroked right (if stroked wrong, she felt nauseated and needed to stop). It was second only to tribbing, and even then, like now, it could give tribbing a run for its gold...

_“Yes,”_ Alphys hissed out, just as Undyne's fingers curved up and found that spot. “Oh _god_, Undyne, please… _please_…! _Pl_\--!”

She stopped talking, her lips preoccupied now with Undyne's, and she clung on, her body starting to move with Undyne's hand. Undyne kissed her harder, pressing her down into the bed and stroking inside of her slowly – but intensely – and all Alphys could do was tremble and cry out and hold on, barely able to breathe, not even _wanting_ to breathe, if breathlessness meant experiencing this pleasure…

Undyne broke their kiss, and when Alphys protested, Undyne responded by moving her head down and wrapping her lips around one of Alphys's breasts, right over its hardened nipple. Again, Alphys arched back, even her head, and in turn, it drove Undyne’s fingers deeper – and brought Alphys closer.

It wasn't always this fast – Alphys was notorious for how long it took her to come – but combined with her brush with death and her renewal of life and love, as well as knowing, now, that she would _never_ lose Undyne…

Well, both of those factors had a hand – _another_ hand – in the speed of Alphys's climax.

“Undyne,” she groaned out between her teeth, just as Undyne was switching nipples – and increased the speed of her fingers, timing them with the way her wife's body moved. “Undyne, I’m…”

Undyne looked up, just as Alphys closed her eyes and threw her head back. Undyne leaned down and bit the other side of Alphys's neck, just as she whimpered out Undyne's name, her body growing hotter and sweatier the closer she got.

That bite, however, broke down _everything_, and with it, Alphys was finished: her orgasm crested through her body, its gentle waves and soothing pleasure coursing through her blood and making her both laugh and cry, thinking only of the one who was pleasuring her…

Then, she went limp, gasping for breath and smiling wide, her body slick and red but tingling with bliss. Her eyes remained closed, too high to open them, and when she felt Undyne curl up into her side, she swallowed hard and tried to move her arms. After two tries, she managed to move one hand, and it was the one closest to Undyne’s head. She stroked Undyne's hair, murmuring affectionate nonsense, and Undyne looked at her and chuckled, leaning over and kissing her scarlet cheek.

“Good?” Undyne wondered after a moment, once she heard Alphys's heart slow down.

“Nguh,” was Alphys's eloquent reply.

Undyne laughed, burying her face into Alphys's chest, and after a moment, Alphys started giggling, too, a little weakly but no less happy.

When they'd bother calmed, Undyne rested her chin on Alphys's chest, between her breasts, and looked up at her. She looked adorable, and Alphys smiled, touching one of Undyne's cheeks affectionately.

“Alphy,” she then began, her voice soft. “I love you.”

“I… love you,” Alphys agreed. “Just… gimme a sec – I want to – with you--,”

Undyne covered her mouth briefly to silence her. “I never said anything about that,” she reminded her. “I just said I love you, Alphy. You don't have to reciprocate. I _don't_ keep score!”

The idea of that made Alphys giggle, again, and Undyne smiled, relaxing. “I _do_ wanna talk, though.”

“You can tell me anything,” Alphys confessed, her eyes closed again. She felt so wonderful…

Then, she felt her wrist held, and her eyes opened, her mind crashing back to Earth, within her body. She looked down, and saw Undyne holding it between her hands, looking sad and thoughtful.

“She really scared you,” Undyne then whispered. “I did, too. You really thought you'd lost me…”

Alphys wasn't sure if she should reply, but it felt wrong not to. “I did. I'm sorry I overreacted, though… I’m ashamed…”

“Don't be,” Undyne pleaded, holding that hand tighter. “You’ve no reason to be ashamed. You were _scared_, and you reacted the way your mind told you to react, because your mind is a bit… uh…”

“Tweaked?” Alphys offered dryly.

Undyne smiled, though. “I was gonna say ‘burnt', but that works, too, I guess.”

“Undyne…” Alphys said, her body starting to recover – and quickly. She reached down with her other hand, pressing it against Undyne's cheek, again.

“I…” She blushed, her eyes darting down to Undyne's breasts, before moving back to her eyes. “U-uhm…”

Undyne, however, grinned, and when she pounced, again, Alphys caught her – and kissed her.

The entire day was spent in that bed, an at-home honeymoon, if one preferred, and all weekend was spent similarly, neither bothering to even get dressed and ordering in food for laughs.

(Only Undyne was brave enough to answer the door naked – but only once. It was still worth it.)

Indeed, the entire weekend was spent talking, eating, sleeping, fucking, and repeating all four in various combinations.

It was the perfect start to the newest – and longest – chapter of their shared life.

* * *

As promised, Alphys took over for Lindsey, finding that she was, with her students, discovering new and interesting things about her wife that she never had, before. She split the class between her science classes, but was part-time for both - the most she could handle.

But she loved it. She didn't mind the double-workload. She didn't mind coming home exhausted. So long as she had Undyne's arms to fall into, everything was going to be okay. 

And Undyne got to see a side of Alphys she'd never had before: confident. 

Certainly, those first few weeks were touch and go, but as Alphys grew a feel for the course, it got easier - and demand for it grew.

When the school year ended for the term, Alphys was a little disappointed, certain it meant the end of her new class.

Instead, Toriel begged her to keep teaching it, showing her letters of demand for it, and Undyne had laughed so hard she was sick into one of Toriel's waste baskets. 

It was perfect.

**THE END**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again to GemR for help with this story! It was great fun working with you, and I look forward to more projects together!


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